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An interview with Tami Hart

Tami Hart is the mastermind behind the addictive electro-punk act, Making Friendz. It’s been a long journey (even though Tami herself is still on the young end of the age spectrum) and as you can see from our conversation below, a very interesting one. Growing up in a small town in South Carolina, surrounded by ultra-religious homophobia and few outlets for her angst, Tami funneled her energies into her music and from a very early age was able to capture the attention of one of, in my humble opinion, the best record labels to ever come out of the ’90s, Mr. Lady. Adding some bonus points to the coolness tip jar, Hart is also currently touring as bassist for the JD Samson fronted group, MEN. We wanted to know, just how did this all come together and where is it going from here?

AfterEllen.com: I know you just got back from Coachella – what was that like?

Tami Hart: It was sort of like Boogie Nights without the drugs or pornography. [Laughs] It was very surreal. It was kind of like too amazing, you know?

AE: Really? Even without the drugs?

TH: Preferably without that. There was a lot of coconut water.

AE: Oh, yeah they actually had that at Lollapalooza this year. That stuff is awesome.

TH: Yeah I’m kind of hooked now; so it was a great marketing strategy. [Laughs]

AE: Well maybe you can become the face of coconut water.

TH: One can only hope.

AE: You have to write a song specifically for it and hope that it catches on. Have you played a bunch of festivals before? You were there playing with MEN, right?

TH: Yes, I’ve been touring as a member of MEN playing bass and guitar. So this was my first experience on a larger scale.

AE: Oh, wow, that’s huge!

TH: It was a little sensory overload at times.

AE: Yeah, I bet. Were you able to enjoy some of the other music?

TH: A lot, actually. Festivals are kind of like the coolest thing ever because all the bands that I wanted to see were there and it would have taken me a year to see them all but I was able to watch them all in a couple of days. It was really amazing. You walk by one stage and it’s, “Oh, The Black Keys are playing” then you walk by another stage and it’s, “Oh, The Kills are playing” and it was all the bands I really like so it was really cool. I saw Robyn.

AE: Oh my God, she’s amazing!

TH: Yes, my mind is still dealing with the magic of Robyn. I have no idea why people are so obsessed with Lady Gaga and not Robyn.

AE: No kidding.

TH: She is amazing and she’s having fun and everyone was just losing it and loving it so much. One of the things that just made me really happy was looking around and seeing how much everyone was loving the music.

AE: Yeah and as a musician that must be the best feeling in the world.

TH: It was really, really cool. I was watching Cut Copy, who put on a really amazing live show, and I looked over and there was this 8-year-old kid who was singing all the words and was dancing next to his dad, who was dancing too, and that made my biological clock tick a little bit. [Laughs] It was just really cool to see.

AE: Yeah, I want one of those [kids], but it would have to be one that dances with me. I know you used to be on Kathleen Hanna’s label, is that how you got to be involved with JD Samson and MEN?

TH: Yes that is. Mr. Lady was run by two people – Kaia Wilson from The Butchies and Tammy Rae Carland who’s an amazing photographer and art professor. I was in high school and I lived in this really small sh—y town in South Carolina and I was, like, a queer punk. AE: [Laughs] So I’m sure that was easy.

TH: Exactly. It really was not. Initially I always played these hard punk songs but in my spare time I’d write these teen angsty songs. I listened to a lot of Nirvana-style acoustic songs because I was looking for a way to get out of the South, because college was never something that was on my radar. So I started sending them these demos I was making and (eventually) they wanted to sign me.

AE: That’s really ballsy as a high school student.

TH: Yeah, it’s weird because I had such determination. I sent them literally 20 tapes because after sending one I got an response from Kaia herself saying, “Don’t give up, keep doing it.” I don’t think she was telling me to keep sending her stuff [Laughs] but I sort of took that as her message to. And then she called me one day and said she wanted to sign me.

AE: Whoa.

TH: Yeah and Le Tigre was on that label. They were the biggest band on that label and I met JD when I was like 18 and we’ve just known each other for a long time. When I toured with my acoustic stuff with Le Tigre – I opened several shows for them and back in November – she asked if I was interested in joining MEN for touring and I jumped at the chance.

AE: I have this image in my head that it’s just a party everywhere you guys go.

TH: [Laughs] Honestly, when I was getting signed to Mr. Lady that was like college for me and it was such an education in how to be a touring musician and with feminism as well. And now I sort of feel like I’m in grad school with MEN. [Laughs] They are such a professional hard-working band and I’ve never been in a band like that before. It’s always just been sort of a party, which is great, but now it’s like, OK this is what I want to do with my life so I’m just learning how to do it.

AE: Do you think it’s been harder or easier to cultivate your solo project while touring with MEN?

TH: I think that it’s been easier because, like again, I’m getting such an education and I just want to see how it’s done and get ideas for my personal project. I’m getting so inspired and learning so much everyday and I’m realizing, OK, I need to really get serious about showing up for sound check and they do so many interviews and they are very consistent and very on-time for everything and it’s really good for me to be around that.

AE: Well you’ve performed between some of the best-loved lesbian acts of all time from Le Tigre, Gossip, Sleater-Kinney, The Indigo Girls and – on behalf of myself and (most likely) the readers of AfterEllen.com – can I just say how insanely jealous we are that you were even in their presence.

TH: [Laughs]

AE: [Laughs] So Indigo Girls – that seems like sort of a stretch. Where did that come from?

TH: It seemed like that for me too. I was really young. I think I was only 19 when I opened for them and they were really good friends with Mr. Lady and Kaia often still performs as a touring member of Amy Ray’s band. AE: Wow, I didn’t know that!

TH: Yeah and The Butchies toured with the Indigo Girls all the time but I have to be honest, I wasn’t a fan at first. I was coming from a place in high school where I was into punk and I got signed as an acoustic solo artist by chance and that was never something that I really wanted to do but it was the first big opportunity that really presented itself to me. It was weird because I was like, “Oh, The Indigo Girls?” but I became such a huge fan. I love those girls. They are so amazing live, they are the nicest people, their fans are the nicest people and I often I love to do “Closer to Fine” when I do karaoke.

AE: That’s fantastic. Do you have someone that does it with you? And do they do the harmonies?

TH: Yeah, I can usually get a good friend to help me out. [Laughs] Actually JD and I just recently did it. Yeah we sound checked it on tour. We were both talking about how much we love them and we did a little version of it when we were sound checking.

AE: Oh my God you need to put that up on YouTube. So tell me about your album, Social Life, I’ve already heard “Situation” and I love it! I’ve seen you describe your sound, or maybe it’s how your label describes it, as for the “punkers who want to dance” and that’s totally that song. And I might be dating myself here but it reminds me of Rock ‘n’ Roll High School.

TH: Oh, I love that!

AE: Oh good, you know that movie! I used to watch that on repeat when I was little.

TH: That’s awesome because honestly in the back of my head I was trying to go for a Ramones look on the cover. I was actually in my underwear but that shot is only from the waist up so I’m kinda bummed out that I didn’t get to show off the tighty-whities but you know I respect their marketing strategies.

AE: Maybe they’re just waiting to put it on the full-length posters to sell at the shows. TH: That would be awesome! That’s a good idea, thank you. We should get you on pay role.

AE: I’m here for all your marketing needs.

TH: [Laughs] So the album – I moved to New York six years ago and I really didn’t want to move here. I lived in San Francisco and I was in a noisy punk band and we had just gotten signed to Post Present Medium, which is a record label that put out a lot of bands that I like Abe Vigoda and Mika Miko and it’s run by those two guys from that band No Age. It’s like noisy weird but I liked it. My partner at the time lived here (in New York) and I wanted to move back and I sort of begrudgingly moved here and I didn’t have any friends and I was really unhappy in my relationship and I found myself being at home alone a lot and fortunately I found myself listening to a lot of Missy Elliott and Justin Timberlake at the time.

AE: As you do.

TH: Yes, I was lucky my mom ran a night club in South Carolina and she would let me come sometimes and she would get a lot of cool promo music so I grew up around a lot of R&B and hip-hop because of her and it’s always been something that I loved and have always secretly written – so I found myself home alone a lot writing this music that was really poppy and R&B-ish and really fun. But then I was also really depressed and I was drinking and doing a lot of drugs so the lyrics are kinda bummers. It was sorta of a tactic in a way because I didn’t really know anybody so I thought, “I’ll start a band and then see if people want to join. I’ll meet people and I’ll make friends with my bandmates and then I’ll have fun in New York,” and that’s kinda how it started.

AE: So how did it turn out? Did you post ads on Craigslist? Did you get a lot of weirdos that responded?

TH: [Laughs] I was fortunate enough. I put out a bulletin on MySpace – I didn’t have a Facebook yet – and I met this really cool guy named Daniel. We really hit it off and he was in the band for about two years and I brought in all the songs and I just wanted it to be a hot mess and he and I were best friends. We would just party our brains out and get really loaded and at first that was what we were known for but eventually it became a bummer for me. I would be performing but I would be so wasted that I would black out.

AE: No, that’s not good.

TH: Yeah it got really sad and during the process of recording this album. I’m sober now, which is something that I like to talk about because my life is so much better.

AE: And that has got to be really difficult to do.

TH: Yeah and I found out how much I actually love performing and I like to be present and actually see people’s faces when they hear the music. So Daniel and I had to part ways because of that. I just don’t want to do drugs anymore and blackout. I am really enjoying performing and being in the moment and that’s something I realized working with MEN. It’s a lot of work and you really have to be there.

AE: So what are your live shows as Making Friendz like now?

TH: It’s been an interesting transition. It’s really fun more like B-52s like back up singers and live keyboards and guitars it will be a whole different experience.

AE: I picture a lot of hand claps.

TH: Definitely hand clapping.

AE: Nice, I like it. It’s funny that you talk about your influences because the ones you have listed on your MySpace page both cracked me up and made perfect sense when listening to your music. Honestly, you could be my long lost sister.

TH: Aww, nice.

AE: I bet you’re good at Trivial Pursuit: Pop Culture Edition.

TH: Wow, that’s a good call, I actually am.

AE: What’s it like to be a queer musician on the road?

TH: For being in MEN it’s really fun especially in towns where they don’t get a lot of queer musicians and they are so excited to see you. Like, we did a show in El Paso and that was my favorite show because everyone there was just so excited and happy and just so lovely. They need that – because that is how I felt when I was in South Carolina. Making Friends just played a show in Arcadia, California and that was my favorite show for the same reason, because everyone was just so happy to have a queer band to come to town, so like everyone was there. AE: Yeah, it’s amazing like when you think back to your own experiences and you’re someone in the audience and you see someone on stage that can speak to you and express how you feel being queer – it has such a huge impact on you as part of the audience. I can’t imagine what it must feel like being on stage and then having people really looking up to you.

TH: That’s really what I live for. For me, there is this band called Light Asylum. You should totally check them out they are a queer two piece, also a boy and a girl. I literally had that feeling while seeing them that I had when I was a kid, that this band was saving my life.

AE: Oh, wow.

TH: And I feel that it what music should really do. Especially for the young kids in the small towns.

AE: When did you come out?

TH: I was still in high school. I had a really hard time with it. I knew I was gay probably at the age of seven and I had a crush on this girl and I remember telling a friend that “I love her.” And he was like, “You’re gay” and I was like “No, I’m not!” not knowing –

AE: Yeah and then BOOM!

TH: And my family is super religious, Baptist and super homophobic. So I developed this really intense sense of denial and my sister kissed a girl before I did and I was furious. But I still was not willing to accept the fact that I was gay even though it was getting harder and harder to hide it. I was kind of a bully in high school and super mean to the out kids, but by sophomore year I apologized to those kids and they became my friends and I was like, “OK, I’m gay.” It was a rough transition. I’m glad that it happened the way it happened and I came out so young. I see people that are coming out at 30 and I can’t even imagine how hard that must be.

AE: Yeah, I just talked to a woman who is 40 and she just came out and she talked about how she’s still a virgin. I’m happy that she’s able to be herself.

TH: That’s interesting to hear too because it makes me think about how fluid sexuality is.

AE: I had a similar experience to you because I knew from a very early age that I was gay, like there was no doubt in my mind and I went through some hiding but just it just blows my mind that for some people it’s just something they don’t think about.

TH: Or just can’t think about, like they develop walls to deny that part. The brain is just an interesting thing. [Laughs]

AE: It sure is. It’s never been able to block that out for me but I don’t remember a lot of my childhood so maybe that’s where it traded up.

TH: [Laughs]

AE: So what’s up for the future of Making Friends? Do you know when the album will be dropping?

TH: Yeah, the album is going to drop on June 21st. The first single is already out now and is called “Situation” and we’re talking about what the next single will be. I’m playing at the Willie May Rock Camp for Girls, which is really cool and I’m excited to help raise money for them and then off to play some shows with MEN this summer and doing some record release shows and hopefully planning a tour.

Be on the lookout for the Making Friendz album June 21. For now, enjoy these digital downloads of the original version of their single “Situation” and the freshly remixed version by Teen Wolf.

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