Several online tabloids and gossip sites have reported that Bobby Brown has recently released (or, in some reports, is about to release) a new tell-all memoir called Bobby Brown: The Truth, The Whole Truth, And Nothing But. And in this book, he apparently reveals his ex-wife, Whitney Houston, married him to quell rumors that she is bisexual.
First of all, how many times does a story need to be recycled to make the news? The rumor that Whitney Houston married Bobby Brown to deflect attention from her close relationship with assistant Robyn Crawford dates back to the 1990s. For example, the book So You Want To Be A Lesbian by Liz Tracey and Sydney Pokorny included this tidbit: “Whitney Houston marries Bobby Brown, giving her ‘personal assistant’ Robyn Crawford a Mercedes as a consolation present.”
That book was published in 1996, the era known as “Before Ellen.”
These same rumors resurfaced in April of 2008, when excerpts of Brown’s memoir leaked to the press. An excerpt from the New York Post from April 3, 2008 reads as follows:
Whitney, he alleges, had been under “a lot of pressure”:
In order to find the truth, the whole truth, I had to endure the embarrassment of asking for this book at a Borders on Park Avenue in Manhattan, a neighborhood so straight laced and corporate that I couldn’t even pass it off as hipster irony. The look on the clerk’s face, a mixture of disdain and morbid curiosity, was priceless. My ears actually turned red in shame. (Damn you, AfterEllen.com.)
First, this book is not “new” or “upcoming” — it was published a year ago. A rambling and marginally literate foreword by a fellow called Derrick Handspike indicates that the book was originally intended to be an autobiography, but then Bobby Brown got cold feet, so Handspike decided to release the book as an unauthorized biography. Handspike, according to dubious internet sources, is a prolific writer and hip hop producer, but an Amazon.com search only turns up the Bobby Brown book. Shady all around.
On page 210 of this fine piece of literature, Bobby Brown is quoted as saying exactly what the Post said — and that’s it. Anti-climatic, indeed.
Perhaps we should take note from the direct source, as Whitney addressed the rumors in Time magazine in 1987:
I will close with one comment: If I really wanted to clean up my image, marrying Bobby Brown is probably the exact opposite of what I would do. I think that book should have been filed in the fiction section for that assertion alone. In fact, I think I would just drive off into the sunset in a Mercedes with my personal assistant at my side.