Lindsay Lohan doesn’t come out looking too good in “Elle UK”

Sometimes rooting for Lindsay Lohan is like trying to make fetch happen. Take, for example, her cover feature on this month’s UK Elle:

As soon as the photos leaked online this morning, Twitter (ever the barometer of social leaning) went nuts. A simple search for “Lohan” and “Elle” reveals responses from “Ugh. LaLohan on Elle. Last I heard she was kicked off Ugly Betty for getting coked on set” to “ZOMG!! Lindsay Lohan’s Elle photos are effing HOTTEST pics ever!” (High praise, considering universally-beloved Emma Watson graced the cover just last month.)

No one’s going to argue that the camera loves her — but, as poetry would have it, it’s what’s actually inside the magazine that gets to the “lost (but lovable)” soul of Hollywood’s favorite contradiction.

The feature is basically the story of Elle trying to pin down Lohan for an interview.

There is something entirely uncontrollable about her. Not out of control. Not “I’ll do what I want” arrogant. It’s just that when you get her attention, you never know how long it will be yours. She bounces between her BlackBerry, the balcony and her iPod playlist (Current favorite: Release Me by Agnes Carlsson). At one point, she’s surprised by a half-eaten slice of pepperoni pizza in front of her. Between bites, she’d managed to forget she was eating it.

The interviewer is quite candid about Lohan’s run-ins with (on-again-off-again girlfriend), Sam Ronson while in London.

It’s only later, when Lindsay’s face is about to crumple into sobs, that the reason for our diversion to Bungalow 8 becomes clear. Sam Ronson is here. [...] It took only seconds for Lindsay to approach and then flee from Sam but, whatever she said, she is devastated. It does not matter that we’re in the middle of a bar, that I’m a journalist she barely knows, that Sam is still in the same room, Lindsay cannot stop the tears. She can barely speak.

Perhaps what is most surprising to the interviewer (and Elle readers) is how quickly she becomes protective of Lohan, even after she’s been repeatedly stood up for the interview. She develops an obvious sisterly affection for her.

She wants to go and talk to Sam. It is not a good idea. But Lindsay is not your best friend and you can’t tell her that. Does she look OK? Amazing. Hair up or down? Down. This top or the other one? That one. You want to stop Lindsay, beg her not to do this to herself.

In the end, the interview never happens. Lohan answers a couple of questions by email, but even the interviewer doesn’t seem put out.

It is when she is asked the most direct questions that she is most elusive. She cannot be constant because she is ruled by the moment. It is frustrating. It is exhausting. But it is real. And in a PR-polished world, you can no more hate her for it than you can avert your eyes from her.

The entire article is worth a read. There are loads more pictures, and it’s probably the fairest assessment of Lohan that I’ve ever read. You can also check out a behind the scenes video from the photoshoot below. Let us know what you think in the comments!

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