Girlfriends, Forever! Pros and cons of adding a pet to your LTR

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If you’re in a committed relationship and you can’t even fathom the possibility of a small human calling you “mom” for at least the next 10 years or maybe the next ten lifetimes, getting a pet is a natural next step in your LTR romance. Think about how much an animal could enhance your life! You could post pictures of your boo holding the cat on Instagram, she could name the dog after you, you could take family holiday card photos, along with a whole host of other adorable activities.

IMG_5952This is Trey

Adopting a pet is awesome, but it isn’t for everyone, and it definitely isn’t for every couple. As someone who has adopted both cats and a dog with a girlfriend, here are some pros and cons to consider before taking the pet plunge.

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Cons of adding a pet to your relationship:

1. You will fight more.

I guarantee it. Adding a pet to a relationship means there will be more effort and more money required from both of you, which are two things that lead to more fighting. If you have a cat, you’ll fight over who is taking them to the vet, who paid for the shots, who cleaned the litter box, or who fed them. If you have a dog, you will wake up every morning to the sound of your girlfriend saying, “Isn’t it your turn to walk him?” as she rolls away from you and pulls the pillows over her head. Suddenly, you’ll find yourselves keeping extra tabs on each other. It used to just be, “Oh, you bought Chinese food last week so I’ll get drinks.” But now it’s, “You forgot to clean the litter box, so don’t even think about kissing me.”

2. You will get cock-blocked by your new best friend (your pet) on a daily basis.

Your pet is going to become your best friend and the love of your life, but he or she is also about to become the biggest cock-block of all the time. Before pets, you and your gf used to have sex spontaneously. Like you’d both be hanging out in bed, and one person would accidentally touch the other person in a sexy way, and suddenly it’s four hours later and you’re both like, “Whoops, we missed book club.” Not anymore. Now that your cats and dogs are in bed with you, no one will get touched in a sexy way by accident. It will have to be extremely deliberate, and highly maneuvered. She will have to reach around your sleeping dog’s adorable face to grab your boob, and guess what? No one wants to do that. Everyone would rather stop at the adorable dog’s face. You get the idea. I know you’re probably thinking, “Okay, just don’t let your pets in bed with you.” We used to think that, too. Good luck. Let me know how that goes.

 3. You will get jealous of how much your girlfriend loves your pet.

My girlfriend and I wake up in the morning and immediately start petting our dog and telling him how much we love him. Then we casually look at each other and say “Oh yeah—love you too.” Where is the love? It’s mostly being soaked up by our dog. Hey, I’m not complaining—he’s the best. I’m just warning you: If you’re the jealous type, you might find yourself daydreaming about how much attention your girlfriend would give you if you were to dress up in a dog costume.

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Pros of adding a pet to your LTR:

1. You’ll find ultimate, unconditional love and lifetime companionship.

This one doesn’t need much explaining. Having a pet is seriously the best and no human could ever take the place of the animal child in your life. Said like a real crazy person.

 2. You’ll finally have a friend who will not tell your secrets.

My dog doesn’t speak English, which is why I feel completely secure in telling him all of my secrets. It’s a relief to know that in this gossipy, back-stabby world, your dog will always have your back, because he is physically unable to betray you.

3. You and your gf will bond over the hard stuff.

You may fight, and there may be extra work to do, but in the long run, you will get so much closer by working through it. You’re raising an animal together! It’s pretty special. It’s like raising an adorable child who will never talk back, and never enter horrifying teenage years, and will always be fluffy and cute. Needless to say, I totally recommend it.

Have ideas for topics you want to hear about? Know a great LTR couple we should interview? Email LTRadvice@gmail.com.

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