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Seriously Sexy Valentine’s Day Gifts for Your Girlfriend

I want to believe in a Valentine’s Day that’s sexy-even if your version of sexy involves wearing your pajamas and watching a Twin Peaks marathon. Yes, Valentine’s Day is a socially crafted holiday that keeps us anxious, buried-in-snow creatures from losing our minds between the middle of winter and the hopeful end of winter. Cool story: My parents’ anniversary is on Cupid’s big day. So now V Day isn’t complete in my house without pink carnations and heart-shaped boxes of candy, while listening to “Heart-Shaped Box” by Nirvana.

But say there’s a special lady in your life this February and you want to surprise her with something spicier than your average teddy bear and flowers. Let’s take a nod from TLC and turn on the red light. (Silk robes included.) Don’t have enough time to grab a little something sweet for your honey? Valentines can be 365 days of the year when love (or lust!) is at play. These gifts-some that won’t break the bank, and some that might (but are totally worth it)-are great today or any day, because surprise sex toys and graphic ’80s lesbian books can be sexy anytime. You’ve earned it; you the seducer, the worthy partner, the kink, the eternal romantic.

As Saint Valentine said to Marvin Gaye, let’s get it on.

A Little Goes a Long Way

Gia, available on Amazon Instant Video for free, or buy it forever for $9.99

It’s just Angelina Jolie for two hours and six minutes-well, it’s her and her mom, and Linda (Elizabeth Mitchell), and super babe Faye Dunaway. Romantics aren’t always tied up into perfect little boxes, and this movie, though dark at almost every turn is still beautiful. Plus, there’s the infamous fence scene…

Kissing, a Field Guide by Violet Blue, $11, sheboptheshop.com

Maybe the biggest thing ever is that “first kiss”-even the ones when we were kids that we laugh (or cringe) about now. The range of sensations leading up to that kiss are everything-it tell us so much about what we like. Think about how sexy it would be to read this field guide aloud with your significant something. This how-to is teaching a whole lot more than just the semantics on kissing-but kissing as an art form.

The Joy of Lesbian Sex by Dr. Emily L. Sisley & Bertha Harris, $27, amazon.com

This is real. This is really a thing. If you’ve ever snuck a peek at the ’70s heterosexual version of a similar title-sans the lesbiana-then you know there’s more than joy within the pages of these books. There’s vivid imagery-of people boning down, in like, every which way. It’s the Bob Ross of sex books. It’s like a Peter, Paul and Mary song stamped onto paper. It was published in 1988, so expect to go back into a bit of a time machine. It’s perfect for the person in your life who would think it’s sorta hilarious, or the girl who is certain to find this a turn-on from page one.

JimmyJane AfterGlow Candle, $29, jimmyjane.com

This candle is literally amazing-it was even featured in a scene from Girls. It comes in a variety of scents, like bourbon, cucumber water, dark vanilla, or pink lotus. That’s-I don’t even know what to say about that incredible range in scent. Impressed. The little spout on the upper corner is really perfect. Who has time to clean up a mess when there’s a sexy massage at play? The warm combination of jojoba oil and Shea butter is sure to set the bar for feel-good activities she won’t forget. It lasts for-ev-er, so if she really loves it, she can try it out on you next time!

The Urge to Splurge

The Silverlake Sleep Short, $60, sloaneandtate.com

What’s sexier than a pair of briefs for your honey on V Day? It’s classic. You can do no wrong. It says: Take your pants off. Snag one of these cotton bad boys in black, burgundy, navy or white. Who knows, maybe you’ll both end up in a striptease with your favorite jams playing in the background. This queer L.A. based lingerie line produces luxury under garments inspired by menswear. (They even have a Valentine’s discount going on right now! Follow them on Instagram for the promo code.)

The Crave Vesper, $69-$149, babeland.com

Babeland calls this their James Bond vixen vibrator. Just look at this sleek necklace: It screams mystery, car chases, sweaty dancing at a salsa bar, espionage, bank robbery, date night. There’s a discreet button on the side you press when you’re ready to get busy, and when you need to recharge, you can plug it into any USB port. Does sexy spy music play when you wear it, too? Perfect for a girl who’s got her eye on a good time, wherever that may be. Who knows, someone may even recognize your neck candy.

OhMiBod Blue Motion, $129, sheboptheshop.com

More like: Oh. My. God. This is the sexiest thing anyone’s ever made. Long distance relationships everywhere-this one’s for you. Thrill-seekers who love a new adventure-you’ll love this too. Can’t be near your other half this holiday but want to show them you’re there? Sending your partner off to an event, but want her to know you’re thinking of her? Here’s how it works. It runs on Bluetooth or Wi-Fi with five vibration settings: preset rhythms, touch (your fingers record a pattern), tap (again, more fingers), wave (motion control), and voice (speak into the microphone and vibrations are mimicked back). The vibrator is wearable, so you can fit it right into your sexiest panties for a night in, or a night out. Whatever your poison.

Have a super sexy V Day.

Lesbian Apparel and Accessories Gay All Day sweatshirt -- AE exclusive

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