The most Pennsatucky smile-worthy Season 2 moments from “Orange is the New Black”

Flacca and Maritza explain love: What is love like, do you ask? On Valentine’s Day, the women all have something to say about the subject. Flacca and Maritza have a very specific vision.

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Flacca: It’s like getting into a bathtub but the water is like warm, chocolate pudding. And The Smiths are playing “There’s a Light That Never Goes Out.” There’s warm lighting all over and there are like five dudes massaging you.
Maritza: And you have a pizza.
Flacca: She’s right. And you also have a pizza.

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Blacky Cindy’s Airport joyride: During Black Cindy’s flashback episode, we find out that she was a TSA agent before she landed in prison. Watching Cindy abuse her authority and terrorize passengers with such glee, especially while cruising through the airport on a motorized cart, did bring a smile to our faces.

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Post-sex punch job: After the best sex of Piper’s life, she has the misfortune of getting socked in the nose by Alex’s jealous girlfriend. While the violence itself isn’t particularly funny, the post-punch/sex awkward conversation between Piper and Alex is. Alex is still pining and flirting while Piper tries to gather her dignity and her clothes and get the hell out. When Alex tries complimenting Piper’s shoes (of which she can only find one) Piper has the last word.

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Piper: They’re from Marshalls. Fuck you.

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Nicky’s imitation of Alex: Piper shows Nicky an unread letter from Alex, one of many she’s received, but can’t bear to throw this one away. Alex’s hold on Piper is still strong, so Nicky tries to lighten the mood by imagining what the letter says.

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Nicky: (holds out her shirt to mimic Alex’s breasts, lowers voice) Hey girl. Sorry I fucked you over in Chicago. It was for your own good. Let me…lick your pussy.
Piper: Probably.

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