“Orphan Black” recap: The Cutest Geek Monkey (1.06)

Previously on Orphan Black, we had five episodes of insanity. Sarah, a woman who grew up an orphan, saw a girl who looked just like her kill herself, then assumed her identity – which was Beth, a police detective. She discovers that Beth was not the only person out there who looked like her and that she was one in a series of clones. Unfortunately, it seems these clones are being killed off one by one. The clones suspect Beth’s boyfriend, Paul, of being a secret agent of sorts, monitoring Beth/Sarah and sending information to some unknown entity. The clones are working together to figure out who they are, where they came from, and who is out to get them – all while trying to retain some normalcy in their everyday lives.

We open on Allison (the housewife clone) watching the video from the nanny cam she set up in her bedroom to see if her husband, Donnie, was a spy, much like Paul turned out to be. She sees on the video that her husband disappeared for a few hours in the middle of the night, so she confronts him.

In the kitchen, Donnie is slamming cabinet doors and muttering to himself about how NOTHING is ready for the neighborhood potluck and could she try to HELP him a little and I wonder if maybe Donnie went to a brainswapping factory because he is acting like a Stepford wife and not the lazy husband of episodes past. Allison ignores his ranting and asks where he went last night, but he deflects and gets angrier and angrier until finally Allison takes a golf club and hits him IN THE FACE.

Meanwhile, at Beth’s apartment, Paul is asking Sarah questions now that he knows she was impersonating his dead girlfriend. Sarah asks where the secret test results go and he says they to go his boss, Olivier, but he doesn’t know what they do with them or what kind of tests they are. He calls Sarah “twin sister” and Sarah knows he’s not lying about how little he knows. (By the end of this episode, I felt like Joey in that episode of Friends where they know but they don’t know WE know they know, etc.)

Having the answers she needs, Sarah wickedly questions him a little more while she undresses “for a shower.” He’s distracted long enough for her to escape through the window. While he’s practically looking at her. Genius.

In the car, Sarah calls Cosima (the scientist clone) and tells her that, even though Paul is her Monitor, he doesn’t know about the clones. Cosima mentions that she might have a Monitor of her own as Delphine (speak of the devil) slinks around the library behind her. Sarah (who is now calling Cosima “Cos.” Which is adorable.) tells her to stay away, but Cos doesn’t want to feel like she’s just the “geek monkey,” so as soon as she hangs up, she struts right up to Delphine. Delphine, in her lovely French accent, invites Cosima to a Neolution lecture, which Cosima thinks is odd, but she agrees to go anyway.

Sarah is barely off the phone when Allison calls and says she needs her to come over, as she drags her unconscious husband down to her basement and ties him to a chair. When Donnie comes to, Allison resumes her line of questioning, this time while wielding a glue gun. The first time she drips hot glue on his chest is an accident and she wigs herself out, but then she gets kind of into playing “bad cop.”

However, in her blind rage, Allison forgot that the whole neighborhood was coming over. Her friend Ainsley and husband are very chipper and…helpful. Which immediately makes me suspicious. Allison quickly calligraphies an “off limits” sign for the basement and runs downstairs for “chips” aka wine and happy pills. While down there, Sarah shows up and Allison is basically like, “Please impersonate me while interrogating my husband who is tied to a chair in my craft room while I serve some cheese and crackers. Don’t mind the burn marks on his chest.”

Sarah  puts up a little resistance, but she does owe Allison a favor, and damn that woman is persuasive, so she puts on a pretty pink shirt and a headband and heads on in.

When Sarah-as-Allison gives Donnie a glass of water, he says he got up to watch cricket in the middle of the night. To which I say, really? That’s the best cover story you could come up with?

Anyway, clearly not understanding how vulnerable a position he’s in, he starts yelling like a douche-canoe again and Sarah loses her cool. She tells him to stop treating his wife like dirt because she is a rock and he doesn’t want to lose what they have – the kids, the home, the family. Everything Sarah never had.

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