“Orange Is the New Black” recap (2.8): Appropriately Sized Pots

In the greenhouse, Caputo is going full on batshit crazy, emptying all of Red’s flowerpots, searching for contraband. She arrives during his tirade and even tosses some pots herself to show him that her hands are clean, or at least give that impression.

CO Fisher is fired up. Well, as fired up as it’s possible for her to get. She discusses her displeasure with her fellow COs and when Caputo comes in, she tells him her frustrations with the SHOT quota. She also doesn’t appreciate that fact that Caputo yelled at her earlier. Caputo, still fired up and covered with a thin layer of pot soil, fires her on the spot.

As Blanca heads to the walk in cooler with a shit ton of pudding, Gloria cuts her off at the pass, sending her to take care of other business. Gloria is startled to see Vee standing in the kitchen, holding a freshly rolled cigarette for her. Vee even made it menthol for her. Vee really wants the scoop on Red, but she’s barking up the wrong tree with her theory that Red’s connection is through the kitchen. As far as Gloria is concerned, she doesn’t trust Red or Vee as far as she can throw them.


CO Fisher, her eyes red from crying, takes some refuge in the chapel. Also there is Nicky, smoking a cig and listening to her radio. When Fisher comes up to her, Nicky is freaked that she’s in trouble. Good thing Fisher no longer works at Litchfield. Nicky does what Nicky does best: give stellar advice. She tells Fisher that there is a world of opportunity out there for her. Go back to school, learn a trade, she advises. Fisher was too good for this place, anyway. Fisher asks Nicky if she’d been hitting on her a few weeks back, and Nicky admits to it. Fisher wasn’t interested but is flattered nonetheless. She takes her leave of Nicky, who goes back to her music. Luschek runs into Fisher and acts like a total man-boy about the whole thing, so Fisher leaves his ass in the dust.

As Rosa is wheeled out of chemo, she sees Yusef and his mother crying in the hallway. She asks CO Ford to wheel her over to him. Yusef approaches Rosa, who thinks the worst and blames herself. Every man she did a job with dies and she declares herself cursed. He’s confused, and she tearfully shouts that he’s too young to die. He’s not dying though. He’s in remission! She wishes him well. “Enjoy your life, shitpot!” laughing with joy the whole way.


We flashback to Rosa behind the glass prison partition. Donnie has come to see her and she laments her greediness. At least he didn’t fall victim to the curse. (There was no after kiss.) She tells him how she misses the smell of money and the thrill of the heist.

In line at the caf, Taystee is openly bitching about Piper’s furlough, while Piper is within earshot. Poussey chimes in, noting that she missed her mother’s funeral while in lock up, and didn’t get furlough. Even Aleida is angry as she aggressively hands Piper her tray. Piper sits down at to eat and Nicky points out that everyone hates Piper, a fact that had not escaped Piper’s attention. Poussey continues her angry remarks, claiming that it’s Piper’s race that got her special treatment. Cindy suggests that perhaps Piper blew Healy to get furlough. Piper has had enough so she stands up and addresses the entire cafeteria. “Yes, I am white. We have established that! And I got furlough too. I guess white privilege wins again. And as a speaker, for the ENTIRE white race, I would like to say I am sorry that you guys got the raw deal. But I love my fucking grandmother. And yeah, she may be a whitey too, but she’s a fucking person and she’s sick, and she needs me. So shut the fuck up.” The cafeteria is silent for a moment until a pie flies through the air, making contact with Piper’s head. Suzanne has once again thrown her pie for Piper. Well, at Piper.


Gloria and Red are having it out behind the scenes. It appears Red is storing her contraband in the kitchen until the heat is off, but Gloria is done with dealing with Red and Vee’s nonsense. She gives Red three days to get her stuff out of there.

Piper marches into Healy’s office to tell him that she no longer wants her furlough because other people need it more. Furthermore, she and everyone else are baffled as to why Healy would work to get her furlough in the first place. “You hate me,” Piper declares. Healy explains that normally he is nothing but a paper pusher but once and while he gets a chance to make a difference. He took that chance with Piper’s furlough and there is no taking it back. He reminds her that she gets a precious chance to say goodbye to someone she loves. Let the other inmates talk. Some opportunities don’t come by again. She takes his words to heart and as she leaves, tells him that he did a good job at counseling just then.

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