“Once Upon a Time” recap (3.09): No Regrets

 
 

Speaking of mothers, flash back to the early days of Regina’s foray into motherhood. She is at the office of baby take-backs, and hands the man at the desk baby Henry, along with a list of his naptime and bedtime routines. And by routines I mean what she’s done with him for the past like two days. The man at the desk was born to work at baby take-back stations, and tells her that sometimes it’s giving up a child for its own best interest that proves your strength. He then steps out of the room to give Regina a chance to say goodbye in private and say what will surely be encouraging words to the adoptive family .

Regina picks up baby Henry and tells him that he deserves better than her. His squishy little face coos in disagreement. By the time the man returned, she was resolute in her decision. She was keeping baby Henry. He was her son.

Out in the hallway, John and Michael Darling storm off in a rage, for it was them who almost adopted Henry. They’re sure Peter Pan isn’t going to be too pleased about this, but I reckon he’ll appreciate having a full-grown heart to steal years down the road instead of a teensy weensy baby heart.

In Neverland, at the Tree of Regret, Peter Pan can’t resist a good old villain’s monologue. He tells the captive ladies that he is Rumple’s father, and that he once abandoned his son, much like Emma and Mary Margaret had once abandoned their children. He pokes at their insecurities, rendering them both speechless. Regina interjects—his mom-shaming isn’t going to work on her. Sure, she’s killed like A LOT of people, ruined countless lives, impersonated a sea goddess, cursed an entire town for decades, etc, etc. But if there’s one thing she hasn’t done, it’s regret a single thing. Because all roads lead her straight to Henry, and Henry is the one thing she ever got right.

Regina busts through the vines, rips Peter Pan’s heart out, and grab’s Pandora’s Box. She looks back at Emma and Mary Margaret with a “what are you waiting for” expression and they all jaunt off to do what the ABC hashtag has been imploring them to do all season: Save Henry.

OUAT 309-6

On the Jolly Roger, Regina gingerly replaces Henry’s heart. After a brief moment of wondering if maybe they were too late, the rugrat awakens, and immediately wraps both of his moms into a big hug.

OUAT 309-7Next time let’s cut out the middle man, ladies.

Flash back to Regina admitting to Dr. Hopper that she fears Emma will one day return for Henry. He tells her to enjoy the love of Henry, enjoy motherhood, and cross that beautiful bridge when she gets to it. Regina takes his advice (with a bit of a magical twist) and takes baby Henry to her father’s tomb. She starts to tell her son a story about a glorious queen who learned that revenge was lonely. But eventually the queen found a little prince to call her own and put a spell on herself so she would forget about her worries about his birth mother showing up. With her fears at bay, the two of them could live in blissful harmony for about another decade or so.

On the Jolly Roger, that decade or so later, Regina tucks Henry in and puts a spell on him to lock his heart in his ribcage where it belongs (Which might have been a good spell to put on him a long time ago? Just in case?). He says, “Thanks, Mom” and she kisses her little prince goodnight.

No sooner does Regina leave then Pan appears at Henry’s bedside, apologizing for what he is about to do…

Above deck, Rumple and Neal reunite, but Rumple immediately senses something is amiss.

Peter Pan tries to take Henry’s heart but is blocked by Regina’s spell, which sends him into a blind panic. He tries to take Henry’s shadow instead causing both of their eyes to flash weirdly, but Rumple shows up just in time puts Pan into Pandora’s Box.

Convinced Henry is finally safe for real, Team Storybrooke and the riff-raff they’ve collected along the way work together and release Pan’s Shadow. Regina magics it into a sail and they fly off toward Storybrooke. Toward home.

Tinkerbell finds Wendy and tells her that she’ll see her brothers soon. Wendy gives Tink some pixie dust, and when Tink protests, Wendy says that someday she’ll find a way to make it work. Wendy says that she believes in her. Tink then finds Regina, saying that she’s happy for her. Regina says that Tink was right all along, there was still some good in her. Tink’s jar of pixie dust glowed, and Regina said that for a moment, it seemed maybe Tink believed in herself.

OUAT 309-8I wouldn’t hate it if this became a thing.

Henry sneaks above deck and finds Felix, The Creepiest Lost Boy. Felix hisses at him that no matter what these other sissies say, he’ll always be loyal to Pan. Henry recites a speech about Pan never failing that Felix had memorized, and Felix’s eyes light up. Henry’s voice coming out of Henry’s body tells Felix that he IS Pan, and the two have a good laugh about it.

What did you think of “Save Henry”?

Here are some of our favorite #queerytales tweets from this week.

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