I would run away from this situation, nothing but disaster can really happen... but then, as I said, I feel very old sometimes.. so do what you can tollerate...

personally, I make it a point not to be involved with involved people... being 'the other woman' does not suit my ego, and it just seems so messy... emotionally, and even physically..

find someone available, out, and not entangled in weird relationship stuff, with either a boy, or a girl

just my two cents

I looked in my crystal ball and what did I see in the future?

A lesbian who hates bisexuals. LOL.

I have been in a somewhat similar situation. So let me tell you that it will end in somewhere between you getting really depress because she will never choose you or she will use you as a play-toy and no1 will ever know the existence of a relationship between you and her.

I think that the only that this can possibly work is that if she really love you. Yes, loveeee,not just like or infatuation. However, seeing that she is still in denial and wouldn't leave her boyfriend. i highly doubt it is not gonna be like that.

I dun think it is good that u will live with her since 1. it is going to kill you if her BF come over all the time and being all over each other. 2. u will not be able to get over this girl for a very very long time since u see her all the time.

My advice is to move on. You are not 60 right? there is still other manatee in the sea ^_^. There will be other that will be happy to be with u and u dun have to snoop around. But then u learn better when u experience pain. U can go ahead and do as ur heart tell you, but be warn that it going to hurt like hell.

Just to clarify! I don't really own a christal ball!!! Used to own a fishbowl though!LOL

Even had a secret message on it. haha

And to get back to the subject. I don't think there is anything wrong in asking for other people's advice/ experiences. It's called making an informed decision. I am sure in the end she will make up her own mind allright.

Work something out with your friend. Just talk to her about it, it's the best way to keep things on a healthy level.

She can't both have the cake and eat it though. No person should sacrifice her dignity by being "the other woman". Either she dumps the boyfriend or you two reign in your hormones and keep your hands off each other. Neither you or her boyfriend should have to suffer through some clandestine affair.

she will be living with you???

thats not a good idea.... first of all u got 2really know what u want ,, because no matter how aware you are of the situation as far as the consequences if you guys go more further, if u like this girl and she likes you ,, you two guys will cross the line and take things forward because of their attraction to each other,, and i'm saying this because i been there before and it really a disastrous situation,, we ended up with our "frienship" because she had a boyfriend which by the way she is about to get married next year,, when i heard it, it completely broke my heart cause i have to admit that i still have feelings for her but what the hell can i do? nothing,, just repress my feelings and move on!

but in your case,, think about your heart,,, think about your self,, cause u might get very hurt...

Wow thanks for all the replies everyone! I didn't expect so much feedback. I wouldn't nomally go online to strangers for advice (in fact, this is the first time I ever did something like this). It's just, it's so much easier to tell strangers than my close friends and risk them passing judgement on me, or even me thinking they're passing judgement (which in some ways is even worse than if they actually are).

Yes, I realize I'm going to be seeing her all the time next year and that's the main reason why I've held out so long. I know that if I get hurt it'll be torture for me all the time so I've been relectant. Well, the thing is, recently I've been having talks with her about monogamy and how she feels it doesn't work for her personnally. This might be a way for her not to feel guilty about her crush on me but it could also be the truth. I don't agree with her views about polygamy however the thing is, I'm not ready for a relationship at all right now. I don't want any kind of commitment. In fact, I haven't wanted commitment for over 8 months now. Now I've never tried any sort of non-commital relationship but all of these talks we've had have made me begin to consider it. If we can have only a certain degree of emotions involved it won't be awkward afterward and it'll be more difficult to feel guilt. Because I may not be prepared for a committed relationship but I am more than prepared for a sexual one only. I think both of us can put away our consciouses long enough to have this steamy affair (no pun intended). I think it's possible not to get too emotionally attached to her, too. I mean I haven't seen her in about 5 days and I'm not pining or anything. In fact, I'm only thinking of her in sexual ways lately.

Do you think it could work? I mean I always boast about how "I'll try anything once (twice if I like it)." This could definitely be an experience. I think we can even remain friends. Actually it would be kind of hot posing as friends but knowing that behind close doors it's much more than that. Besides, I need to practise anyway. I've never done anything with a girl except kiss. There's just the matter of getting to boyfriend to let her date openly again (they were in an open relationship until a little while before she met me and now she says she regrets telling him she'll be exclusive). Anyways, thanks a lot everyone. Any feedback on this idea?

She's not the kind of person to try to weasel out of it. In fact, she'll probably confront him before it happens and telling him to accept it or leave sort of thing. She's fierce, trust me. If he finds out he won't confront me, either. He'd wait until I come to apologize to him. I can't help but think that it's her that wears the pants in the realationship. :S Not that that makes it any better or worse. They'd work it out, though. They always work things out.

Okay so apparently I'm indecicive. Well, that's nothing new, but I have changed my mind a lot about this. At first I viewed it in the "ignorance is bliss" way meaning forget about her etc... Then I was all for helping her cheat on her bf in a purely physical and non-commital way, and now I've realized that I've fallen too hard for her to do either of those things.

We had a talk today about the guilt we feel about this and we talked about how we both recognized that he doesn't deserve the pain it would cause him. I mean, he is devoted to her (I can't blame him) and he is a really good guy. And then we talked about living together and how that's gonna suck... and I basically said "you know what, above everything, you're still a great friend who I love to hang out with, we're gonna have a blast." and that's where we left that. I also decided that I want to do the least amount of damage possible with this situation. So my conclusion is to wait. Wait as long as I have to and maybe when the time comes we'll both be ready to commit, have a lovely time and everything will be 'happily ever after.' In the meantime, I'll try to curb my jealousy.

Besides, right now, both of us have issues committing and we're litterally in our last week of school before we don't see eachother for 4 months.

Also, I've always believed that you appreciate things (aka people) more if you have to wait for them.