Help: what to do?

well ok so my name is camille, i'm turing 17 tomorrow!!, and im going into senior yr of h/s.. im bi, and been really aware since 9th grade or w/e..and i'm currently dating (my first love) marie, she is one year older & just graduated and going to college (8 hours away :/ ) marie has been aware of sexuality (bi) since 9th as well, her first love was a girl, and they dated on and off for two years...so she is clearly bi aswell...the issue is not whether we are gay or not..(thank god) haha...I'm at the point where i can be out, i do not care, but she is totally not, and i love her...so we are a "hidden relationship." we have been together over 9 months, and its great, we talked and we are going to  be together while she is at university.  the reason she wants to remain hidden is, because in her first relationship with a girl, her mom found out, and made her life HELL, she sent her to a shrink, took away all forms of communication..you know all of that messed up stuff...so she is TERRIFIED.  She can barely see me, because her parents will find out (they are PSYCO)..we cant talk on the fone, because g-d forbid they hear its me..( they hate me btw ..cause her mom knows im bi) Today we got into a fight, which started because she said she couldnt see me on my BIRTHDAYY!!! :( i was really bummed...then it changed to a BIG fight about how she can NEVER be out, then later she said how she was having a breakdown.. and its not tru...she has no idea whe  she will come out, because she is so scared.  her parents will disown her.  my good friend said to me once....you either take her for everything she is....but if u ask her to change this one aspect about her, u are changing so much...and she wnt change ANYTIME SOON, to me 9 months is a while, and im getting super fustrated, i am wiling to wait for her, causse u know i love her, but today she also said...it hurts o breath...cause she lives a ie..her parents dnt trust her, and theyshouldnt cause she is lying bout...me, and she is so torn and hurt.it reaks my heart..i told her i wanna jus leave her, so she can find a nice boy, and fall in love, because i cant be with her if she is in SO MUCH PAIN, you know....but she said she is gunna make it work with me in college..we are gunna talk on the phone and video chat ( cause mommy aint around)...i love her dearly...i would do ANYTHINGG for her..you know...we talked bout marriage/children when we are older...she is so apart of me, i cant let her go....its so hard...but sometimes..i feel like maybe i'm kidding myself?...but sometimes im like...its love, u cnt let go of someone you love..... oh and BTW we dnt have sex...we did once 6 months in..but havent since then...we were supposed to on my birthdayy :(  (and even more why im disappointed)....its just so depressing..her mother...is ruining her life..she made my baby dependent on her..so she cant defy her....she is scared and doesnt wanna come out :(  ...today hurt so much..so much crying...but she wants to forget it...and so do i....but i like cant....i feel like my bday is ruined....i just want girlfriend time, with my girlfriend..i'm affraid i'm going to have to wait....a while..

 

HELPLPPLPPP, any questions..(if i left something out) let me know pleaseee!