Being bisexual and lesbian in college/university :)

Hey,

I'm at university (live in Holland, don't exactly know what is meant by college. maybe between high school and uni?) and I started coming out a year ago. I only realised I was not straight in the final year of high-school. Going to uni, moving out, a new environment, all those things really helped me to get to know myself better, I realised who I was. That's why I think a lot of people come out at college/uni!

Good luck with the article!

I haven't completely come out, although almost all of my friends at school/in calgary do know. When I first started dating my ex-girlfriend, when we would tell people we would get alot of the "oh .. experimenting!" like we were some horny crazy college girls who couldnt wait for a threesome. and people wouldnt take us seriously.

That was pretty disheartening which is why I have chosen not to come out fully to my family or home town friends until I am out of school and have a career. Not only is it hard to pin people down with labels when they have much more accomplished attributes, and hard to front on someone when they clearly know who they are, I mostly want to wait so I am taken seriously. So I can escape that stigma about experimenting in college, and in part, save college from that stigma as well. It is a place of learning, and I just happened to be learning about myself, but I was not part of some lab experiment. at least not in terms of sexuality.

However, university students are typically liberal minded, open minded, and unsure of who they are as well, and university has served as a nice buffer zone. I do find myself being alot more comfortable in this environment, I know coming out in highschool would never have gone well, but here it seems to just come naturally.. Most people you meet at school could care less who you love and sleep with. And since there are alot of diverse people, and alot of different social networks, if someone you meet does see it as a problem, its really easy eliminate them from your social sphere.  I often forget that it is even possible to have conflict because of sexuality, that is until I come home to visit the fam, but for me, it just seems to be becoming more and more of a non issue.

I do hope to get more involved in 'queers on campus' next year..

I was in the closet in highschool.  Although, to be honest I hadn't technically admitted it to myself yet either.  I must have been an adiot. What did I think I was doing when I stared longingly at at my very attractive sophomore math teacher?  So dense. ANYWAYS, when I finally came to college, I met more people, a diverse group, and I felt more comfortable being myself around them.  It also helped that gravitated towards people who I knew were like me.  Plus, we have a very active LGBT group here and I got into that. We have Pride Prom tonight - Woo!!

So, to answer the question why so many people come out in college, I think it is because you are surrounded by all these new people, where no one expects you to be something. You can just be you.  Whereas in highschool/middleschool, you are only in contact with the kids you've known all your life, and that is a much harder environment to come out to since people have all these preconcieved notions of who you are and who you should be.

Now, coming back home that first year after college was not so much fun. I really hate how you basically have to come out your whole life. I swear I'm just going to start wearing a sign around my neck.

Well, good luck wioth your article!

________________

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Hey there,

I go to a University in mediterranean europe. It's a very catholic country here - although the trends are changing with the younger generations (fingers crossed it will progress fast, because unfortunately the religion is bound too tightly with close-mindedness).

Im not technically out - 'coming out' to people is a concept i dont approve of much since i believe that, ideally, it should be a non-issue. But that's very idealistic i know, ther will always be people who need the concept of 'not a choice = merits equality" spelled out to them. However, i have had a couple of episodes at parties on campus where i kissed another girl. She's bi, and due to the setting im pretty sure most people assumed it was just drunken straight-girl kissing - which it wasnt.

And finally, i agree about people coming out in college mostly becos its a time of defining yourself and gaining so much more autonomy; you get an opportunity to morph into the person u really are becos u get the freedom for it, freedom from havign to fit into a stereotype previously 'imposed' or influenced by your family unit...

Goodluck withthe project, and sorry for the chunks of text - i kinda get carried away 0=)

I study in a major university in eastern Europe, quite a homophobic country in general, tops every europian statistic on the issue.

Ok so in my faculty there are mainly guys, about 70-80%, I don't know of anybody that is openly gay, I am in a sort of a glass closet myself, I am not so close with most people over there, so they are not really involved in my personal life. I have been out to a large group of college students from different places, and I didn't feel a single person having a negative attitude towards me, just the opposite. 

I could basicly say that it is not a hostile enviroment in general, being a really elite university, people tend to be smart and open minded, even though seriously undereducated about all the issues.

We don't have a GSA, or an organization of any sort, but I think it's a matter of time, it just takes longer. The first GSA in the country was just founded these days, in the American University. It created maybe some controversy, but I think in a short period of time, it'll be a significant step forward, for the simple reason that it kills the "Don't ask, don't tell" sort of hidden policy, that is everywhere. In fact we are not even in a point where Don't ask, don't tell applies, heterosexuality is just assumed by default in colleges, or everywhere overall.

But I guess college creates a safer enviroment, than high school, or even a job. There is no confirmity in college, that's what helps greater diversity. In high school there used to be spots to fill for the outsider's role, that's why everybody tried to be a certain way, to fit in. Out here people are more interested in what you carry in your head, not to mention they study a lot, so who has time for idle gossip. I don't feel uncomfortable about coming out, while at high school it felt unthinkable. I might just be overly optimistic, as usual, and not give you the real picture, but that is how I see it. 

I'm at university in The Netherlands and I came out as soon as I started here. I figured it out in my senior year of high school and I figured I might as well get a fresh, out and proud start. Since then, I've not really made an effort to be out but I do react like a straight person would (just with different pronouns) to conversations about relationships and such. I make it a non-issue so many follow my lead and just accept it. The ones who do question me further do so out of sheer curiosity and not out of any malicious intent, so I just answer honestly.

I have a great group of friends who are all ok with the fact that I'm gay - several are bisexual themselves.

Have I ever felt singled out? No, because being gay is very accepted here - like I said, it's mostly a non-issue.

Are there specific groups tailoured to LGBT students? Yes, we have D!to which is an LGBT youth group. I've never had much to do with them though, but I hear they're a great help to youths who are still struggling with their sexuality.

I think that many people start to question their sexuality in college and/or come out there because it's a new start. Fresh people, fresh city, fresh subjects to study; a perfect environment to start over, being more yourself. In high school, belonging to a group is very important and you have to do quite a lot to change the way people look at you when you're restricted like that. Once you get to college, people are meeting you and getting to know you as you are at that moment - you don't have all the history.

As for questioning their sexuality in college: You meet all sorts of new people. You might develop a crush on a person you wouldn't otherwise have looked twice at (again with the high school and fitting in) or you are crushed upon by a person who otherwise might not have shown that. It's a time of openness, new possibilities. Also, as was said above, the general open-minded culture of colleges helps, I think.

Hope this was useful to you and good luck on your article! 

I like my women like I like my poetry: strong, beautiful and rhythmic

I remember showing up to gay-themed events when I was 18 and thinking, "God, EVERYONE HERE must know I'm gay." And showing up to political groups, a year later, that had a GLBT slant and feeling like I'd just outed myself. And walking past the GSA office for the first three years of college, wishing desperately that I could go in, but with that special brand of solipsism that was characteristic of my late-teens / early 20s angsty self, I thought that everyone would be watching me and know that I was gay. And that if I were to do any of these - there would be no going back and I would be committed, irrevocably, to a self that was gay. Of course, no one knew that I was gay - or even wondered! - and most of my concerns were in my head only.

Anyway, that was my experience. I don't feel that the GLBT group on campus - as lovely as it was - helped or hindered in any way, as I was only comfortable going after I was out. Maybe insofar as it provided gay visibility? Like, look, here are the lesbians on campus - and you know them, and you like them, and they're all right. What helped more - professors who taught me feminist and queer theory. The library - I could just hang out in the stacks and become comfortable w/ being gay through books. The internet. 

"Most Lesbians are deliberate cowards. Usually they're too lazy or too full of themselves to go out and get themselves a man." (The Shadowy Sex, Hilary Hilton)

Well I personally had questioned my sexuality when I realized I got turned on by two girls together when I was a freshman in high school. I had seen Kissing Jessica Stein for the first time lol.  But for me, going to college was the time I could come out.  It was my chance to be who I wanted to be and make friends based on the true me.  Ironically my roommate and neighbor that I became friends with were both lesbians so it really helped me be comfortable in coming out and being myself. So college helped me be honest with who I am.  I wouldn't say I feel singled out.  But at the same time it's hard.  We have a straight-gay alliance type club, but unfortunately the people are my campus just see it as the "gay" club and we don't have many members.  It's kind of a joke.  It's really rather sad, I feel like people don't want to go because they think people will assume them gay, not like a straight ally or something.  It's hard to meet some lesbian or gay friends too. Still a lot of closeted ones running around my campus lol. 

I feel a lot of people start to question their sexuality or come out in college because of comfort.  In high school it's a smaller community and usually you're with people that you have going to school with for awhile, so coming out there is difficult.  It is more of a popularity contest, worrying about what people think of you and so on.  I feel like college, although some carrying on their high school antics there, is more of a new experience when questioning life in general is just the norm.   It is a little more comforting to be a new person, or be the person you have always wanted, or hell be the same person lol. 

Not sure if I can actually answer this because I won't be attending college until the fall, but I have been to my future campus many times to visit my girlfriend and we have seen many girls holding hands with girls and guys affectionate with guys. Their union has its own "LGBT Center" out in the open and has weekly activities for LGBT and allies. Actually, I met my girlfriend in the dorms last year in her first year of college. I am eager to check out some of these activities next year because I know Milwaukee accepts that lifestyle.

 I think more people want to come out and experience themselves in college because it's opposite of high school in some ways. You can't name everyone walking on campus like you can in high school. Not everyone knows your history. It's like you can start clean in college and you aren't as worried about friendships denting because of it.

Good luck

I have the fortune/misfortune of going to a very large university in a very large city so it's hard to feel singled out. But I did come out in my English class about 2 weeks ago. I haven't even told my parents or friends yet but I told them. We were having a discussion about a girl's essay topic. She supports marriage for non-heterosexuals. Another girl said that she thinks BANNING HOMOSEXUALITY would be the best course of action for society. Not just marriage for homosexuals but banning homosexuality altogether! At that point my heart was racing so fast I thought it was going to burst out of my chest and smack the girl in her face. I still didn't say anything because I'm not 100% comfortable with acknowledging my queerness. However, another said that being homosexual is a choice and that there is no scientific evidence that it is real. Then, a guy equated homosexuality to pedophilia and serial killing. I almost completely lost my shit. I had to come out and tell them that their words were really hurtful and that as a gay person I was deeply offended. They all shut up after that.

I never would have the courage to do that, however, if it wasn't for the GLBT group on my campus. It only meets once a week, but it was so helpful to see kids my own age living their lives unabashedly and standing up for what they believe in. I'm able to discuss my love of Jennifer Beals with those guys and they don't judge me. Well, the chick who is in love with Kate Moennig judges me, but that's different. ;)

I think people come out in college because of the reasons already stated: away from home, new fresh environment, new people. It's a chance to reinvent yourself and be whoever the hell you want to be without worrying that people are going to write crap about you on bathroom stalls.

Sorry for the long post, but I hope it helps. :)

I had a very accepting environment when i first came out. In fact the first person in my life that I truly came out to was my college roommate, freshman year, and we're still great friends to this day. Plus the city that I'm living in is rather known for having a strongly liberal, bohemian culture. I haven't joined any LGBT groups on campus, but that's mostly because of my insane schedule; I know there are several, and they put on a great Day of Silence rally this week.

As for coming out in college, I feel like a lot of people do because it's probably the easiest time in your life to do something like that. You're moving to a new place, with brand-new teachers, brand-new friends...basically you're going to be around people who don't know anything about you. It's much easier to be who you are, and if someone doesn't accept you, then you just don't have to stay around them. 

-- 

let's just pretend i said something constructive and intelligent.

I go to the University of Glasgow and I never experienced any problems, and in fact the rainbow flag was flying high outside the main building one day.

I had a long-term boyfriend when I first started and my friends were the same ones I'd had since high school so obviously I can't comment on the feelings people must have when they first enter uni and have to go through it with new people, it must be daunting.

When I came out no one really knew at uni, they didn't ask and I didn't feel the need to tell them unless they asked if I had a boyfriend. When a friend from my specialist subject bumped into me in a gay club it was really matter of fact and not a big deal. My specialist subject group was really close though so nobody had a problem at all, some of them even asked questions and found my perspectives interesting when a gender topic arose.

The only time I felt like I couldn't be open was in an American feminist class because for some reason people associated hardcore men-hating feminists with lesbians and I didn't want my opinions to be judged any differently from others. That's possibly because I wasn't friendly with most people in that class, and was a little unsure of them.

Now my student time is almost up and my biggest regret of all is not joining the LGBT group, I know people who have in other universities and they say it is a really great way to meet other gay people, which would have been useful for me having a pretty much straight only group of friends. 

I'm in my final year of university now, but when I first went to uni I thought it would be a good time for me to come out, I figured all new people, can start with a new slate and become the 'real' me. However that all changed on the second night, we were all sat around chatting about our senior schools. I said I went to an all girl school and one of my flatmates turned round and said 'I thought girls from all girls schools were either lesbians or complete sluts, I guess I was wrong!' I was just about to say, 'well actually... ' when another of my new flatmates piped up 'thank god your not a lesbian, one of my worries before I came to uni was that end up living with a wierdo or a lesbian' Which kind of knocked me, so I just stayed quiet. Anyway I love all my flatmates to bits despite this and I've lived with them for the last 3 years now, but I still havnt told them, I'm just too scared to! I really wish I had just said it on that second night and dealt withthe consequeces. Sometimes I worry I'll jut blurt it out when I'm drunk and I have a bit more courage! I'm sure I'll tell them eventually though!

When I applied for accomodation at birmingham university in the UK, they even offered an LGBTQ option where they would place you in a corridor with other other lgbtq people. My friends all either felt very strongly for or against it -it tended to be the gay friends who'd had a difficult coming-out experience who thought I should take it & my straight friends who were offended by the idea that i wouldn't want to share acommodation with straight people who were very against it. I didn't take it, as i didn't want gay life to become my total social scene, but it's nice to know the option is there for those who need it. 

I don't think I'll help you with you're article I'm afraid because I'm not out and I'm at the end of my final year now...*sighs*, but I often wonder how my experience of uni thus far, despite being mostly fantastic, could have differed in an equally great way. I think university definitely offers the ideal platform for 'coming out' as there are predominantly intelligent, liberal minded people attending and lgtb societies and such. I know one exists on my campus but I never seriously considered joining it as I just felt I'd be outing myself and once that was done, there would be no retracting those steps. In addition, I still wasn't completely comfortable with the idea of being bisexual/lesbian. Even now, I'm still unsure but hey isn't sexuality supposed to be fluid for many of us, so trying to label myself can be tricky as preferences tend to shift. I think maybe I'm just waiting to see if the right girl comes along and maybe then I'll seriously consider telling people, but I don't know how I'll ever be in a position to find that girl if I'm completely closeted and don't mingle in any queer social circles/have any queer acquaintances/friends. It's a bit of a no brainer unfortunately.

Anyway, I'm really envious of you ladies who have came out and admitted you like girls, as you all seem to have had a positive expeience. I feel like in a way I've missed out on the 'other' side of things and not explored that side of myself at all but I suppose I'm also fearful about not being accepted in the lesbian/gay community anyway as I don't identify as being lesbian/gay and I look and act very straight too. I've heard negative stories of people who don't fit the stereotype/being bi/basicaly not being gay enough not being accepted fully but I'm speaking from an Irish context here and a city with a very small visible lgtb(in theory at least) community. I think I don't want to forego my hetero privileges on one one hand but I get so sick of the mainstream lifestyle sometimes, in every sense. Sorry I think I went off the point considerably but good luck with your article!!

But I went to Jackson State University which is a historically black university in Jackson Mississippi. Jackson State actually has a large gay and lesbian population so coming out wasn't an issue it was the city which is still very racist and in no way wants anything to do with homosexuality at all. It made my skin a lot thicker that it was before I went there tough.

At Jackson State there is a glbt community but it is not in relation with the school.

Good luck and if you have any questions feel free to email me

I go to college here in the states (go jerzey! lol) and I did what any other lesbian would do... I joined a really straight all girls sorority! Well at first I was really scared they would kick me out and everything, but I told my "big"who was also the president and she was just like be yourself and no one will even care if your gay or not. So then I came out to everyone and they were so cool always asking about my gf and saying she was hot & everything (yes they are all "straight" lol). I was really surprised and felt like they cared about me and my feelings and making me comfortable not just asking to be nice about it. They were very supportive and I think I was very lucky that they were all cool open-minded people. I did feel like I was one of very few gay people at my school though (although I hear there are lots more), but there isn't really any gay community organization on campus. At least not one that is heard of around school.

In a totally unrelated story.... I had this philosophy teacher who made gay jokes (about gay guys mostly) but then would say "No one can get offended because I tell these jokes to my gay friends and they laugh." Like yes all gay people are the same so if you tell your friends that means your gay students should laugh too. He was really ignorant and I did feel really uncomfortable in his class and I lost total respect for him. He wouldn't get up there and make religious jokes or jokes about race so why about gay people? And he told them to our whole class who just started laughing like crazy and they would all chime in with their gay jokes too, but it wasn't like oh haha this is funny it was more making fun of jokes.

I feel singled out a lot because I just don’t fit middle class white American southern culture, and I live In the south and just graduated from a major southern university.

Just from a Canadian perspective, I just got back from 3 years at UofT (downtown). It was a great experience. I know other universities (i.e. McGill, McMaster) have a greater sense of community and activism than ours, but I really like the people I met there. For one thing, knowing other students just makes it easy to relate to each other's schooling woe's (for UofT it is insane obsession with academia :P).

It's probably about the best time to be out and meet people. :-) And don't be discouraged if you don't find your group on the first shot. The Toronto community's huge, but not overly publicized, so sometimes it takes a bit. Once you get one person you click with, you'll probably meet everyone else. ^^

Have you ever (or did you) feel/felt singled out as a bisexual or lesbian on your college campus?

Maybe, since my campus is swarmed with religious people. I try not to let it get to me. 

How did it affect your college experience?

Definitely felt like I had to declare my way in on campus. I hated how some conservative people in class would treat me as if I literally liked every female I spoke to.

Are there any organizations tailored for you such as Gay-Straight Alliances?

There's a LGBTQ club that I helped support, but they were kind of off to the side since we have so many clubs on campus. I took matters into my own hands and ran for student government. After my acceptance, I came out to the whole entire campus of 19,000 students. Being out and in leadership definitely got the campus people's attention. 

If so, did these organizations help or hinder your college experience?

No effect whatsoever. I feel like I've contributed more by just being myself, a lesbian in a position of leadership and of utmost academia. I remember having people come out to me all the time... it was really cool.

Why do you think so many people come out or start to question their sexuality in college?

 Psychosocially, it's the intimacy stage, I'd have to say.

I'm a senior in university in Orange County, CA (One of the more Republican places in an otherwise liberal state) and my sexuality has never been out there, so to speak. I don't live on campus, I just show up for class then leave.

As for gay/straight alliances or LGBT groups, I've seen their posters during the club week at school along with the other campus organizations but I never hear of any activities, see any flyers, met any recruiters (*snicker*) or anything of the like, leading me to believe that the homos don't receive much funding. My high school didn't even have a Gay/Straight Alliance, during a time when more and more high schools across the US were starting them.

I live in a largely conservative area, where the only girl-on-girl action you'll see is at a bar with a group of dudes circled around them chanting, "Go! Go! Go!" (I do not jest. I kissed a crush at one of these bars once and next thing I know, the entire Delta Beta whatever fraternity had surrounded us with this cheer. I didn't know whether it was a joke or a prelude to public gang rape.) Therefore, I'm not surprised at the lack of LGBT resources on campus.

While it doesn't significantly bother me, I do feel a bit...wistful, I suppose. I really want to meet and befriend bi/lesbian women in my area, I just don't know where they're hiding. Probably far from the Delta Betas.

As for why people tend to come out in college, well, at that stage you're really starting to formulate the foundations of who you are as a person, away from the settings of your childhood and away from the weird fishbowl experience that is high school.

What Eastern European country? I'm from Lithuania so I understand. Keep your head high and keep smiling. Good luck!

"He drew a circle that shut me out; as a heretic, rebel, a thing to flout. But love and I had the wit to win; we drew a circle that let him in!" --Edwin Markham

Have you ever (or did you) feel/felt singled out as a bisexual or lesbian on your college campus?

No, never felt signled out. Actually, I wanted to be THE lesbian at my university (The University of Maryland Eastern Shore), which was an HBCU near the shores of MD. Alot of HBCUs, nowadays, have growing, and dare I say, strong LGB (I dunno about T) communities.

How did it affect your college experience?

It was weird. In HS, I was a more or less closeted/ambiguous youngster. Clearly, I was a tomboy, but I couldn't really express myself. Being THE gay at UMES was cool...it was a niche, and sorta a title. I wasn't super cool, but I was known...and I had a good time. I think my tenure at the shore was the beginning phases of the growth and vibrance of the LGB community at my alma mater. The LGBT org celebrated their first pride week last fall.

Are there any organizations tailored for you such as Gay-Straight Alliances? If so, did these organizations help or hinder your college experience?

There was an LGBT org, Uniquely Defined, developed when I was a freshman. It was passed on to me when I was still fairly young in the life, and it was really overwhelming to run. We never officially combined the ranks of the LGB on the shore, so this was different. Also, a gay-straight alliance or anything like it was still really new at an HBCU...not only for students, but for faculty/administration as well. It was hard, and the org was dissolved for about a year or two. Luckily tho, it was restarted by some students, and they seem to really be putting in work make it last. UD taught me the hardwork it takes to make an org work, and it made me a better leader thru trial and error. Also, I'm glad I could expose the younger students to it, so that the ambitious ones could pick up the ball and keep it going.

Why do you think so many people come out or start to question their sexuality in college? 

Cuz they're free, and their parents are out their hair...and possibly their old friends arent there either. It's like no judgement or starting over. And you have your own dorm room (well, shared probably)...and you just have alot of free time to explore your fantasies without the worries of real life (for the most part). You can dabble because everybody else is dabbling too...and you meet so many different people who influence you to try something new or think about things differently. It's a growing experience, and the perfect time to "find yourself"

Have you ever (or did you) feel/felt singled out as a bisexual or lesbian on your college campus?

WEll since I attend the largest university in the US, that means the number of lesbians/bisexuals is that much greater, so no, I really never felt singled out.

How did it affect your college experience?

Um it madeit amazing so far! I'm definitely more willing to come out and say thing like "my girlfriend" or something instead of using ambiguous pronouns.

Are there any organizations tailored for you such as Gay-Straight Alliances?

There are like 8 LGBT groups on campus... so that makes it a very accepting environment. It's also specialized so you can join the LGBT group for business majors if you are interested in that route, and so on.

If so, did these organizations help or hinder your college experience?

See above!

Why do you think so many people come out or start to question their sexuality in college? 

There are no parents around, and you can do whatever you feel like doing, and in a lot of cases, that is coming out of the closet and being more yourself.

I was told I couldn't hold an office in this sorority type group I was in because I was gay.

Needless to say, I quit that shortly thereafter.

x Rage More x

am currently attending a university in cali and im an active member of a sorority.

gamma phi bete <3 

and all of  my sisters know of my interest in woman ;] 

so yeahh..  no prob there..

I'll be starting my sophomore year at a private university in PA in a couple of weeks, and so far I've only told 2 people I'm bi. I'm a member of my campus LGBT organization, but we're a really small club and don't really hold events or do much of anything. But we'll have a new adviser (I think) this semester so maybe we'll do more planning for activities. 

I really want to be more out than I am. It seems like the people I've gotten acquainted with here are conservative except for a few. I didn't say anything when a girl that I thought I was becoming friends with started to say really homophobic things, and I promised myself I wouldn't just be silent anymore. This year I want to be able to talk about it because I'm not ashamed of who I like. I have no problem telling people I'm an atheist which is also considered really unusual, so I don't know why this should be different.

My Facebook says that I'm bi, though, so if anyone reads my info from my school they'll be able to see it.  

I think people start to question their sexuality in college because they're away from their parents for the first time, surrounded by a bunch of people who don't know them, and they're at the right age. In high school it's still easy to worry about things getting back to people. College is free, everyone lets loose, sexuality is only one of the areas in which people start to experiment and explore in.

For me, starting to come out in college was only a matter of coincidence. If the girl I loved had happened to want to make a go of it in high school, I probably would have come out then. The age was right anyways, and it was easier to explain as a college aged person, than if I had been a junior in high school. 

I think a more interesting question would be... what happens after college? So many girls are what people refer to as  BUGS or GUGS... (aren't those the terms?) Gay until or Bi until graduation? Anyways... i think that is a very interesting phenomenon. What about graduation means the end of experimentation? Graduation also, often means it's harder to meet gay people...

 Which reminds me... if anyone reading this is in the N. Idaho/Coeur d' Alene/Spokane region... Where does one go about meeting women??? 

There were many vocal organizations for gay students at my university in central Pennsylvania.  There were definitely resources available for GLBT students, which is fantastic.  However, the overall atmosphere of the school doesn't scream Gay Pride... probably the opposite... lots of vocal homophobic Christians were there too.  The whole scene was kind of hidden. The best I can describe the lesbians I did encounter is super clique-ish.  I'm just not the cliquey type, so I never really fit in. Girly girls (like myself) have no chance, unless you tattoo HEY, I'M BI on your forehead.  I absolutely could have tried harder, but the scene really did nothing for me.  I was envious of the rich girls I knew that got to go to Holyoke and the like... LOL. 

One of the simultaneously funny and sad things I witnessed a lot in college was the super Christian, conservative types deal with their own homosexuality - it would inevitably spill out whenever they drank alcohol.  The power of denial is amazing.