I HHHATTEE the word "dyke"

I hate the words dyke and fag...HATE THEM!

As for the term "partner"...I use it whenever I am talking to someone about their significant other whether or not they are gay or straight so not to out anyone or offend! (makes everyone equal...no one feels bad...etc.) 

The Future Belongs to Those Who Believe in The Beauty of Their Dreams. ~Eleanor Roosevelt

So I completely understand where people are coming from. To be honest, I'm surprised anyone even kinda agrees... 

I know its not nearly OR WOULD EVER BE on the same level as the n-word (HATE THAT WORD TOO!) or anything like that, but my dislike for the word not only comes from the negative experiences I've had with it.

I think I just straight up dislike the sound of it. There's words I like and don't like. Like the word "moist"....hahaha don't like that either.  

But to be serious I'm not trying to downplay the fact that yeah it is/can be a term of endearment and like my friend that's reading this over my shoulder is saying just be happy no one's throwing rocks at you or trying to send you off to "BIBLE" camp lol.....

but me personally....I just don't like it and you'll never hear me use it. It makes me sad that it is so commonly used (again, just my personal opinion) like "dykes on bikes" at pride, etc, etc, etc. Sure, anything can be said in a derogatory manner...but ugghh "dyke" just grinds my fucking gears.  

I guess I just wrote this to vent that NO not all Lesbians like hearing/using the word. Use it if you like, just don't use it with me.

Synonyms....soo. many. better. synonyms.    

Seriously, as a society, we really need to stop giving words so much power.  I'm not fond of the word 'Dyke' but I know when it's being used as a pejorative and when it's being used as a term of endearment.  The same with the word 'N*****'.  I focus on intent.. what is the intent of the person using one of those words around me or to describe me?  Either way, I'm not going to crumble into a heap if someone yells the word 'Dyke'at me.. or, my personal fave, 'Dyke N*****'.

The truth about words like Dyke, N*****, Fag, or any number of negative descriptors, is that the hostile person yelling that angry epithet at you is counting on you being offended, hurt and/or angered by its use.  Their intent is to hurt you with those words.  Don't let them.  At the very least, don't let them know they hit their target.

If your goal is to rid the world of words like that, you have to stop giving them so much power.

Having said all of the above, here are just a few, of many, words that I do not like the sound of...

• Cling
• Moist
• Schenectady
• Botulism
• Chuckle
• Funion

I understand where you're coming from. I also understand that some lesbians think it's okay to use that word within our community. But when we use it, it is easy for others to think that it's not a big deal; regardless of the fact that we don't say it with hate.

I always refer to myself as lesbian, I really prefer that. 

We all know there are some words that are socially unacceptable, and sometimes when someone really wants to say that word they'll just use a substitute to avoid getting in trouble...when you know damn well what they meant.

Like when people were calling Obama a "terrorist"...or the crazy lady that said he was an "Arab"...I really think they wanted to use the n-word.

I've also heard people say certain phrases where I felt like they really wanted to say "fag". You can forbid people from saying words, but it really doesn't reduce hate when a person just hates...they'll find another way to say it.

Commie, socialist, redistributionist, fascist => Nazi.

and moist...

on a lighter note

OhioLezGirlinNYC

I hate the fact that I give so much credence OR THOUGHT to a word...

but honestly I am heartened to the fact that we can debate and discuss it. While we can't wish away people's MIND BLOWINGLY BAD ignorance at times I liken my views AND FORGIVE ME FOR USING THESE REFERENCES to Tina Fey in Mean Girls when she says

 "we need to stop calling each other sluts and whores, it just makes it easier for guys to call us sluts and whores."

Or even in Forrest Gump when he says "he doesn't like being called crippled anymore than I like being called Stupid."

I guess dyke is that for me.

There are words I feel that empower us as individuals and then words that degrade us. Words like the n-word and dyke I feel in no way show who we are as people.

I know I'm not exactly a saint and that I am guilty of excessive cussing that can be offensive I'm sure, but I would never call anybody by such words. I am gay and I am proud of it.

But I prefer to look past a label and would hope people would do the same for me.

Libby. Just plain ol' Libby.

I'd feel at a total loss. I respect people's self identification and preferences, but this word is a key identity label for myself - so I'd hope that if I used it to refer to myself in conversation, other people could respect that, too.

For me, dyke is a word that refers to a community of female bodied people, but that is more gender inclusive than 'lesbian'. I would never identify as a lesbian - I've always heard it defined as a woman who prefers women. As a genderqueer identified individual, I strongly connect with identifying as "queer" (another reclaimed term) and "dyke". It is important for me to be able to identify as a genderqueer dyke - or a female bodied, non-woman-identified person who prefers other female bodied people, regardles of gender ID. Dyke, because it has been reclaimed, is a term that seems more flexible, more open to self definition.

When words are weilded against us, to hurt us, as a community sometimes the only option is to stop taking offence. To, rather, begin to celebrate and redefine those words. Celebrating the word 'dyke', and using it to describe myself in a joyful and proud way has taken power away from those who would use it to hurt me. What hurts, when someone hurls this word at me, is the intent in their voice - their will for verbal violence. I shake my head, and continue, but I make it as clear as I can that that word cannot hurt me anymore. It's mine.

Which is why when I read the original post, and saw that she asked her friend not to use the word 'dyke' anymore, I was extremely taken aback. It is fair to not feel comfortable identifying with a term, but it might be extremely empowering for your friend to use that word in describing herself. It might be her central identity label. Surely you can respect the personal reclamation of that word, even if you don't want the word itself used to describe you?

I think if someone identifies as "dyke" then, by all means, use that in reference to them.  If someone is taken aback/hurt/dislikes the word, don't use it.  Same with lesbian.  I prefer "lesbian", I don't feel "queer" but I have many friends that feel like "queer" describes them, and not lesbian.  I think the intent behind the usage is the most important...

as far as partner goes, I call my GF "my better half" when talking about her in conversation.  We have a domestic partnership, and I refuse to use the word "wife" until it is legal for me to get married.  Maybe that's silly, but to me it's like pointing out "Here I go to my SEPERATE legal arrangement".  She says partner, it just rolls off her tongue, and sometimes she calls me her wife, and I tell her not to because we aren't married, and the point is that we can't be married here in CA, so why pretend we are when they won't let us..... (well, that's a rant for another day) When I talk to people about our relationship, they get the entire "separate but not equal so I have to use five syllables to describe her, instead of one and you are going to have to sit through my uncomfortable use of the term until something changes" lecture.

generally, I like the word dyke.  But I like dykes.  i don't like the word "nipple".  i can barely type it....

Don't mind the word dyke either. I would only use it jokingly to describe myself, for that I prefer to use the word gay. However, I have been called the word dyke in an insulting sense before and it upset me.

 A word that I completely hate so much I can't even say it is "snog" even thinking about that word makes me cringe haha

I don't really have a problem with any word... they all sound wrong to me, because the whole discussion seems wrong to me.

I identify as a person who likes women and whatever word you want to stick to that description is fine with me, I won't use them.

The only one I use myself is gay, that just makes it sound all happy. And I'm a happy person, so that all ads up :)

I don't like using the 'word' dyke personally myself... but only because I have no gay female friends, and so the only time I hear the word being said is through my straight friends. And most notably its my male friends who get alot of amusement out of the word and the way it sounds... (so my eyes are always rolling during these convo moments).

I myself use the offending term as a way to galvanize myself against disapproval. It sounds so final, so last-word (like a real dyke made out of dirt and stones.)

I like the definition I've heard: "a dyke is a lesbian with attitude." Also, I must say, I've been inundated to its use by the spectanfabulistic comic strip "Dykes to Watch Out For" by Alison Bechdel. It's probably fair to say that if one thing "converted me" it was that.

It's like Amy Ray (allegedly) said about being gay instead of lesbian: it has one syllable, which makes sense in a strange way.

I just noticed the OP edited her original post to read:

When the original post before edit contains:

So poetic.