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Real Lesbians do exist and are soooo over men, including sex and relationships with menI've been reading some of the topics about bisexual women, faux lesbians who have sex with men and lesbians who enjoy gay and straight porn. For the most part I've been laughing my ass off because I and many other gay women I know are so far removed from the assumptions that the original posters write as if they were carved in stone. Personally, I have not had sex with a male in over 25 years nor do I have any desire to. I never think about them, get attracted or want to (ugh) date a man. I used to open doors for guys when I was a teen and still finding my true sexuality. The boys I thought I like all turned out to be gay. They also happened to be pretty like girls. Ta-da! I knew very early on where my heart was. Of course, I find some men (mostly actors) to be attractive from the neck up but I still don't want to be with them. Why marginalize lesbians and throw all this nonsense at them when most lesbians have had to process their own identities before realizing they solely loved women. We have been castigated for too long by society's and religions' heterosexual values - do we really need more bullshit spewing forth on this website? We are everywhere and one size does not fit all. There's no need to justify to what I believe are trolls among us who want to get a rise from us to give themselves a sense of power and control. Instead, we should create a supportive safe AE forum that nurtures our true selves, whether it be lesbian, bi or the rest of the GLBT rainbow. Personally, I'm just turned off by the psychobabble that some of these topics cover and I wouldn't be surprised that some posters are really men who want to have a go at us. I have pretty good Troll Radar and I say let's stop feeding them and they'll go elsewhere.
Submitted by Anonymous on March 3, 2009 - 3:03pm. |
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News, Reviews & Commentary on Lesbian and Bisexual women in Entertainment and the Media
Ooops. Sorry.
Brainfart on my part. But I'm usually only asked such questions in German. Looks like I have to work on my international flirting skills. It's a bit hard for girls like me over the net, since I prefer a more physical approach to this specific form of "communication". ;)
Hah! Give me half of Xena's skills, and I'll take over Europe. Empress Tatiana. I like the ring of that. Or Tatiana the Great? Nah, too pompous. And too much connotations.
Still working on the wings thingy. Comes time, comes wings. But in the meantime I still have my loyal broom (twin F119-PW-100, thrust vectoring, supercruise and full stealth setup; yeah, it's a hell of a broom (and it cost a fortune), but you have to go with the time).
Mermaids? Hmm.....the problem with your standard mermaid is that they are sweet from the waist up. But, they lack something. Something important. So, I think I'll continue to play with the Rhinemaidens. They're sweet, too. And complete. :p
Hessian tease? Hey! I'm not a mercenary. I'm pretty sure I know which side I would have fought on in this war. That is, if they would have allowed me to fight, I mean, being a woman and all. But I guess the tease fits. Sometimes. Depends on the company. :)
In this day and age...
again, where's the "thumbs up" button?
hear hear, sister
That's my story and I'm sticking to it!
Sharing. Sounds like a good idea.
Thx for reminding me what this thread is about, Sunnyboi. Time to lower the DEFCON Level again.
But I'm not sure if I have a lot to share, because my story is pretty simple.
When my sexuality awakened around the age of 9-10, I knew right from the start that I'm into girls. I also knew girls were expected to be into boys and vice versa. But this concept never made any sense to me beyond the aspect of procreation. And no, it didn't have anything to do with the girls-are-stupid and boys-are-stupid phase most men and women go through during their childhood. It was just a simple "Thx, not interested".
I made my first sexual experiences with a girl at age 12, and she also became my first girlfriend. I made my first, and only, experiences with men at age 16, and it was purely experimental. I just wanted to know if it would give me anything, but it didn't. So I closed this case, and I have not felt even the slightest urge to reopen it since then.
For me my sexuality was never a puzzle. I guess that's the reason why I'm puzzled about people who are puzzled about their sexuality. I think it's pretty easy: You just have to listen to your feelings. Let the Force guide you, to say so.
I see two main problems:
1) It would be more productive if people would focus more on solving the problems within their own community, instead of constantly sticking their nose into the business of other communities.
2) It seems some people are taking the experiences they made with their own sexuality, and then they try to somehow force-project them onto everyone around them. To me this looks like they're trying to validate themselves, to assure themselves that they are "normal". Seems for some people it is very important to belong to the "majority crowd". I've been in the minority in most aspects ever since, so I'm just used to it. I know that most of the time numbers are not that important. What really counts are honesty, courage, honour and dignity.
---------------------------------------------------------
"Reason obeys itself. Ignorance submits to what is dictated to it." - Thomas Paine
Honesty, courage, honour & dignity - sounds like a good recipe
Thanks for sharing, Tia. I always come away from your posts with a little more enlightenment and what you say is refreshingly thought-provoking.
AE is an excellent site for people to come together and share their thoughts and feelings. Sometimes that's all it takes to make day-to-day living better.
About Womyn Loving Womyn
www.myspace.com/lunakiss7.com
Sunnyboi created this thread or forum to center mainly on womyn loving womyn no matter if you identify as bisexual or lesbian or queer or questioning or your personal identity. She's trying to create a positve environment. I speak for myself have taken offense to someone else's opinion and that's what it all boiled down to us a bunch of opinions. Now that have we let off our steam, spit our intellect and swung our debate sword can we please focus what was originally started: womyn. Hello.
Since we're on the topic of womyn, do you ladies love womyn if so what kind? Are you the picky type? I can't wrap myself around the word love like romantically love all womyn. I don't know all womyn. I'm attracted to certain type of womyn and not all womyn so therefore I am picky. I am just a picky Lesbian with integrity.
Can anyone relative and have trouble swallowing the word love? Can I get some feedback w/o any shouting matches and mudslinging insults (I include myself n that).
PLEASE DO NOT SEND ME A PM ABOUT MEETING WOMYN ON ANOTHER SITE. I'M NOT INTO THE DATING SITE ADVERTISMENT. GREATLY APPRECIATED!
How about some happier thoughts
Since this topic was here for positive thoughts, I thought I would put some pictures of Idina, because who doesn't have positive thoughts when looking at her. Just trying to lift the mood. Oh and My name is Angie and I like girls, a lot.
"Life... is like a grapefruit. It's orange and squishy, and has a few pips in it, and some folks have half a one for breakfast." Douglas Adams
There's nothing like a beautiful smiling woman to lift my spirit
Idina is lovely. In her top photo, she reminds me a little of Penelope Cruz who is drop dead gorgeous too.
Thanks for the eye candy. Made my day!
My type of woman
has to have a type of swagger to her. Like take Fly Khicks from ABDC this one girl in the group Wendy always had this attitude of I don't care if we are not the fav. Sh*t i'm still gonna bring it. So swagger to me is sexy. I like them with some height for sure, smart, sense of humor, if they can dance...bonus!. As for race, hot is hot imo no matter what the race. So one day it can go from the black girl to the south east asian to the white girl to the arab to the spanish girl. Nothing wrong with being picky b/c if she really likes you then she will rise to the occasion.
I don't have trouble swallowing the word love, I just don't use it unless it's for family. When I say it I mean it, so I don't use it with anyone I date b/c if I don't feel like I love you then i'm not gonna say it even if they use it.
Link to video of the dance thats goes with this pic of the Fly Khicks (Wendy is the the one on the far right with the black jacket sitting down..look at the swagger)
http://www.dailymotion.com/search/fly+khicks+week+6/video/x8gu13_america...We're off A Good start About Womyn Who Love Womyn
www.myspace.com/lunakiss7.com
Pictures beautiful womyn/hot womyn/ interesting womyn are a defintely calms me down. Thanks Angie. Speaking of swagger, that's hot in a womyn. You know don't mess with me attitude. I know tons of girls/womyn post only pictures of beautful womyn like hey that's there type. Swagger is part of the package. I want the whole package not just a nice face or body. I want her to have confident walk, dress according to how she stles, enter a womyn of "I got this" attitude be it not confused with "Yeah, I'm all of that but you ain't," speak proudly and she knows her sh$%. Anybody feeling me on that? Anybody people watch, I absolutely love to do). You know the type you takes ownership of their own being-that type f womyn. A womyn can look good 24/7 and have hot body but it still can do nothing for me if she's lie hiding or can't speak up for herself. Like Pink, I don't know to put a phoo of her from my saved pictures. The c/p (copy/paste) isn't working for me.
Down to earthy /earthy types, real cool/laidback types. When I figure out to work this I'll post photos later.
Oh yeah, Hey Angie (waving) How are you? Hey ladies? (waving). How good was your day? My name is Lunakiss I'm attracted to certain womyn. Welcome =).
Somestart a next question... like Womyn are like.... (finish my sentence)
AngieM, I like the photo of Idina smiling. I like that photo with bright moroon/orange colors. Very nice!
PLEASE DO NOT SEND ME A PM ABOUT MEETING WOMYN ON ANOTHER SITE. I'M NOT INTO THE DATING SITE ADVERTISMENT. GREATLY APPRECIATED!
Women are like apples on trees
"Women are like apples on trees, the best ones are on the top of the tree. The women don't want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and don't want to get hurt. Instead, they just get the rotten apples from the ground that aren't so good but easy. So, the apples at the top think something is wrong with them, when in reality they are amazing. They just have to wait for the right woman to come along, the one who's brave enough to climb all the way to the top becuase they value quality."
Stole that quote from think exist.com changed a few pronouns is all. I think this quote is so true though.
I feel you on a woman having the attitude of I am the sugar honey ice tea, and you can take it or leave it....and either way it's whatever. Pink does have that kind of attitude along with Angela Bassett, Michelle Rodriguez, Diana Taurasi, Candace Parker, Gina Carano but hers is more subtle until you mess with her, Naomi on the catwalk, and many others.
The first woman I had a crush on was............(finish my sentence)
There you go pic of PINK
The first woman I had a crush on was
The first woman I had a crush on was Winona Ryder, starting when I was like 7 or 8.
The first woman I had a crush on in the real world was my little sister's best friend's mom. I hung out with my little sister and her friend quite a bit for a while.
What kind of things immediatey attract you to a woman? What immediatley turns you off?
"Life... is like a grapefruit. It's orange and squishy, and has a few pips in it, and some folks have half a one for breakfast." Douglas Adams
Just a little more...
Michelle Rodriguez
Melissa York, Alison Martlew, Kaia Wilson (The Butchies)
Ashanti in Resident Evil
Rachel Maddow
In Black and White
Tegan & Sara, Amanda Palmer, Amy Cook
Alison Martlew
Rachel Maddow
Sorry for going off topic but lesbians onscreen and in real life
Sheetal Seth
Lisa Ray
Sheetal and Lisa played a lesbian couple in the World Unseen and I can't think straight. The movie title, I can't think straight, says it all.
The World Unseen
Out writer director and producer couple
Shamim Sarif
Hanan Kattan (her partner of Jordanian-Palestinian origin)
Jessica Clarke (out model and personal coach)
Shelly Conn (of Nina's Heavenly Delights and Mistresses fame)
Padma Lakshmi
Jill Hennessy (from Chutney Popcorn.)
Kate Clinton and Urvashi Vaid (LGBT activist and Indian-American attorney) make a cute couple.
Wanda Sykes
Sheryl Swoopes
Urvashi Vaid's speech before gay rights March in Washington. She was born overseas but came to the US when she was 8 and has been active for LGBT rights for over 25 years. She wrote a book called Virtual Equality: The Mainstreaming of Gay and Lesbian Liberation which won a Stonewall Book award.
Hello lesbian and gay Americans. I am proud to stand before you as a lesbian today. With hearts full of love and the abiding faith in justice, we have come toJenny Shimzu
Saving Face
Israeli lesbian love story
Janina Gavankar from the L word
Interracial lesbian movies that prove some people are at least lucky to find such relationships onscreen.
Watermelon woman (A movie that no one knows about and is hard to find).
When night is falling
The Incredibly True Adventure of Two Girls in Love
Robin's hood
Round Trip
Unveiled (German-Iranian lesbian love story)
Nina's heavenly delights
Chutney Popcorn
Red Doors
Aimee and Jaguar (lesbian love story set in Nazi Germany)
Mulholland Drive
The Gymnast (Asian American/White)
What kind of things immediatey attract you to a woman?
What kind of things immediatey attract you to a woman? What immediatley turns you off?
What immediately attracts me to a woman is lips, idk but I have a thing for a nice pair of full sized lips....or a persons hair I have thing about hair for some reason.
What turns me off is a horrible attitude. They can be the hottest thing out, but if their attitude is horrible then it's just a immediate turn off.
And to answer my question from earlier my first crush was on this girl in my class in the 3rd grade, and celebrity crush was on Salt N Peppa as a child.
My ideal woman is... (finish my sentence)
these games are fun
their mannerisms!
and what they do when no ones watching. and of course their smile. but the natural kind of smile. ya know the one they get when you're sitting in class and someone says something funny, and that smile just comes out. that one just melts my heart like butter! :)
The ideal woman
Her Pussy...
...I'm just sayin'.
Sure, personality is important too, i guess.
The question was what first attracts you, right?
Of course second would be her eyes, but you cant fuck an eyeball, know what i"m sayin'? So I'll stick with pussy here. Hell, Ive stuck with it all these years, might as well go down with the ship riding it.
Pussy!!
Were you at the Britney Spears concert
http://www.lovebscott.com/2009/03/09/britney-my-pussy-is-hanging-out/
"Come On Then Get These Good Done Debbies"
HA!
Indeed Cylon, you are correct!
;-)
Pussy?
OK, I admit it has something to do with it.
Buuuuuut, there's A LOT of pussy out there, so I'd say it's about finding the right pussy, or pussies.
Personality sure is important. But it takes quite a while to figure out someone's personality. Often enough, things are not as they seem to be at the first moment. So I wouldn't put personality into the "What attracts you instantly?" category.
Risking to sound superficial here, but how she looks and behaves is what make me interested in a woman. And risking to sound lame, but her eyes, the way she uses them (her looks) and the way she smiles are very important.
There are some characteristics I feel strongly attracted to if a woman has them. The kind of woman who turns your head and makes you walk against that damn lamp post. But everything else is a blank sheet. Often enough I have found myself attracted to women of whom I wouldn't have thought before I could be attracted to them. I just trust my instincts, and so far this has worked well.
I have no fucking clue...
...why one person out of millions makes my heart beat fast, my palms sweat, my voice stutter....ocupies my dreams, day and night.....
But every single time it IS a woman. And there is always a pussy. So, this seemed like an easy jump to make. Obviously, its fraught with nuance.
Dammit to hell, this should be easier!
:)
My ideal woman is..
in the looks department if they looked like VS model Emanuela de Paula from Brazil, that woul be ideal for sure.
As long as we click, they have passion for something in life, and they have a good heart, that would be my ideal woman.
"Come On Then Get These Good Done Debbies"
My ideal woman
My ideal woman has a good sense of humor and is intelligent. She is adventurous and open minded. And honest, I can't stand being lied to. Oh and if she looks like Megan Fox that would be ideal. (Too bad I met Megan Fox and she was a real bitch, but that doesn't change the fact that she is crazy hot.)
Ladies And Gentlewomyn Are Great
www.myspace.com/lunakiss7.com
I'm drooling all over your pics(wiping my mouth). My ideal womyn is mouth- watering awesome. Speaking of pussy (LOL)
What about pussy that you love so much ....
The smell and taste (if kept clean and fresh)...
I like...
...that it is always attached to a woman!
Not to mention the pleasure it can give her.....
Please stay on topic
I know things have gotten a little heated earlier in this discussion and the pictures have helped to diffuse things a bit -- But please remember to stay on topic. We have lots of other threads where you can post pictures of beautiful women. :)
Thanks.
_________
AfterEllen Moderator, please report any problems or suggestions here.
Question
It appears that Harpy's subject line says it all
I suppose that if a picture was 'worth a thousand words' about the topic, then that would seem okay. Just plastering bunches of pix that have nothing to do with the topic is appropriate for another thread perhaps called Beautiful Women.
So where are all the 'Real' lesbians
I guess this topic has gone full circle. Please prove me wrong.
As much as I enjoyed the pix of all the lovely ladies that were posted, I thought more sharing could have been made and shown different philosophies and outlooks from gay women. It would have made a positive impact. So my gay lady sisters, let's hear from you.
?
The sky's the limit
The reason I started this topic was I got weary about hearing how there were no 'real' lesbians and so much centered on bisexuality and men, men, men. There's nothing wrong if one is bi but it felt like the other part of GLBT was invisible - the lesbian woman.
I hoped there'd be lots of feedback and stories as varied because all gay women are individual and have different stories. I'm not trying to be an 'editor' of this thread but just inviting other gay women to share whatever they want. If they would rather not, that's fine too and the thread will eventually dissipate or go off topic again.
Is it wrong?
Is it wrong to have a space that discusses women who love women (only)?
There are gay bars, lesbians bars and mixed bars for everyone. Some women including myself have felt that places where some times they just don't want to see a man, not even a eunuch (lol) around. I think this feeling, this notion that you know what "it's not about you-today" threatens people. It's not about lesbian speratism nor misandry, but a small humble space or a corporate one (Dinah Shore, lol) for women who love women only.
Is it wrong to want that?
I get the impression that some people feel that I would want this ALL THE TIME, you know a "no boys club", an all-female universe, which is not true nor possible. Just a space where I'll go twice a week, after work where there could be some turkish oil wrestling or jello, hmm!
Labels exists to put some order so have an illusion of control. Some embrace it some reject it but hopefully know they are there. The word lesbian means many things and many people use different meanings.
Lesbian- I like women mostly but might have an once in a blue moon romp with a man.
Lesbian- I like women only, seriously.
Lesbian- I hate men! grrr.
Lesbian- Yea I know I happen to be a man, but trust me, I'm a lesbian ;)
Lesbian- Yes I'm from Lesbos, it's a beautiful country!
I have accepted all of these definitions except the 4th one, I need time on that one.
I feel like gay culture is dying
How's that for philosophy? The extreme ends of the spectrum of the gay community seems left out of the "accepted". In my teens and early 20s I wanted people to be able to tell I was gay just by looking at me. I didn't want to look "normal"...I didn't want to blend in with straight people.
I remember one of my friends from my gay youth group saying to me one day "You are the epitome of dyke!" because of the way I was dressed. We would sort of one up each other on how gay we could look. But we still looked different from each other.
Does gay have a look? Yeah, if you want it to. Some gay women really can't help it, they are what they are. I can pass if I want to because I have hips and boobs and soft facial features. I can put on a dress and makeup and totally look femme, but I feel like I'm in drag...in costume. And it makes me feel uncomfortable because that's not how I feel on the inside.
I'm not saying femme lesbians aren't real lesbians or anything. I'm just saying we need those gays that straight people find more difficult to accept, the ones that challenge perceptions of gender and how men and women ought to look and behave.
A teenage lesbian recently filed a lawsuit just to wear a tux to prom. Some of the comments I've read are a long the lines of barring a girl from wearing a dress isn't discrimination against sexual orienatation because lesbians can wear dresses. Well yeah, we can, but that's not the point. We shouldn't have to wear dresses. Straight women shouldn't even have to wear dresses. We should be allowed to stick out like a sore thumb if we want to.
What I love about gay
What I love about gay culture is how they challenge gender norms. How the story of the lesbian teen challenges what a woman should look like, how anyone should look like. What I love about gay culture is how it opens up a new way for humans to look at how we love and portray ourselves. It’s sad that in these days people ask those who challenge the status quo to assimilate or literally be assaulted.
It [gay culture] shows what we can be ourselves without judgment, although people are prone to judge. To find that safe pocket to express ourselves in hostile times means a lot when there are people supporting you at the local LBGT youth centers. I hope to think that gay culture is not really dying but morphing into something else, not just about pride parties but were people who don’t “read” gay or those who do can find a place to be themselves.
Being and woman who loves women is not easy because a lot of the personal hardships I went through, I feel deals a lot with sexism and homophobia. It’s nice to know that there is a space where I can go to express that without someone saying “oh you just need a man to fix that”. It’s nice to escape to a place where there is a “no boys allowed”, but it’s being threatened and I wonder what is so wrong with that? I have my conclusions, being that it deals with sexism and dealing with unwanted intrusion from men and those who insist that it’s being misandrist if I say “no thanks”.
My humble impression of gay culture does not begin at Stonewall in 1969; but when women who loved women and where married to men used to come together share their feelings. How these gatherings became political with the tide of the feminism, sexual revolution and of course Stonewall. It has been a long road, but things change and I hope that as long there is a place no matter how small someone can feel safe for not being straight, a culture thrives no matter how small and humble it is.