Is Weight A Big Deal?

Hey, as long as they have a pretty face and AWSOME personaity, I wouldn't care if they weighed 250lbs...okay, so that's a lie but, I think it depends on an individals preferences. Don't worry about it. She will either like you or she won't. I don't think your weight would/should factor into the equation enough to make it a deal breaker.

...Did I make any sense? 

"I'm sister Blanche, and we're here to...collect clothes for uhhh...needy sexy people" 

if and when you get the girl in bed and you have a not so sturdy bed and your afraid the bed would collapse. That should be the only time weight should be an issue. LOL! 

The bigger issue is how you feel about yourself. If you present yourself with confidence and self worth, no girl could turn you down. Do whatever you have to do to make yourself happy. The rest will fall into place if you love yourself. I am personally very attracted by confidence. Just be yourself.

"You must be the change you wish to see in the world" Ghandi

"Do or Do Not, there is no try" Yoda

"Be true to who you are!".

I don't think there should be an issue! Of anything girls with a bit more on them is sexier, personaly that's what I think. I'm not a fan of boney things. One of my best mates is like a size 6 and a feel really uncomfy hugging her sometimes because I can just feel bone, it's pretty scary. So you shouldn't be worried about weight! As long as you feel comfortable with yourself then that all that maters and if this girl doesn't like it then she's an idot.

I have never cared what a woman weighs (although I do prefer a more voluptuous goddess, myself).  It's all in how she carries herself, and whether she thinks she is the shit.  Because if she thinks it, everyone else around her, including me, thinks it.  Confidence is the sexiest thing to me. 

Happiness is not the absence of sorrow...it is the absence of fear...

Instead of yelling out "HEY LOOK AT THAT FATTY' It would be more descrete to yell out "LOOK AT THE PERSON OVER THERE, THE ONE STUFFING THEIR FACE WITH UNHEALTHY FOOD...NO NOT THAT ONE, THE ONE THAT STUFFS THEIR FACE AND DOESN'T WORK OUT" 

That way it's got a political correctness to it.

I don't like the word fat, I don't like any word that is in the same catagory as fat.

Nobody deserves to have a label attatched to their ass (figurtively speaking) 

 We are who we are, love us or leave us.

"I'm sister Blanche, and we're here to...collect clothes for uhhh...needy sexy people" 

my gf is overweight, and always was. i'm on the other hand quite skinny - i'm 51 kilos and she's 76 (don't know how it translates into pounds). but she has a great personality, smile, she makes me laugh, and she has confidence. trust yourself and be confident of who you are - if you won't love yourself, it will be hard for other to love you. personally, i like it that she's a bit overweight, there's more of her or something like that..but too much weight on is just not good for you anyway... it's also, i think, important to iive healthely. my gf and i live pretty healithly and take care of ourselves - work out, eat healthy, don't smoke too much and stuff. take care of yourself, that's a form of investing in yourself and loving yourself, showing yourself your worth it. it will also make you feel better. so you should try to live healthier and not just for the person your dating.

in any case - good luck in your date!!! 

your about 112 and your gf is about 167? 

To me weight is a big deal. I do choose girls based on hair color, eye color, skin, color, and weight. I would not turn you away just because you're. . . healthy. If you're an interesting person I would totally date you, but I'm already in a relationship. She's muscular and I don't have a problem with her.

The real problem is myself and I know it. I'm not afraid to admit. I've had a problem with my weight and went to "desperate measures" to loose weight.

4give and 4get

insecurities insecurities i blame the media and ourselves as a community. i have no issue dating a thick and sexy and confident womyn. i know what i like and if you are that insecure about silly things like your body in which we are designed to embrace than that is more of a turn-off than your body image itself. i particularly don't like people who are not in shape it does not matter your body type you have to be in shape to be with me. i have a very active lifestyle so if you can't keep up i am so leaving you where i found you.

for most people if they can wrap there arms around you and hug themseleves that is a turn off and if they can't wrap there arms around you that is a turn off. all i care about is that you care about yourself first and not let people get to you on silly things like the way you look. embrace it and live your life : )

i am going to be honest. i think weight can sometimes be an issue. first and foremost a health issue. and that sways both ways you can be a size 2 and be unhealthy and be a size 12 and be completely healthy. secondly i think weight is very subjective what one person deems "big" might be average or small and vice versa. just like you cant help who you are attracted to you also cant help what you are attracted to and lastly (and most importantly) love your body, with its imperfections because its one of a kind. keep it healthy...you only get one =)

"you have the voice of an angel, your voice is like a combination of fergie and jesus"

its definately all about the confidence. you have to wear your body/hair/whatever! x

think about that girl from the gossip- shes all about her curves!

i love John Waters.

Yeah I'm around 124 on a "hey i had dinner every night this week' week, and i've dated women who are 200+. Fine is fine; i do NOT discriminate. Even though i love to make a good fat joke every once in a while. (or once a day.)

I got a dick like a mule...with a big dick.

Honestly,I'm afraid of overweight,but just for myself.
I'm 5'5'' n was 58kgs but on the way to 60kgs if i dont keep fit.I was 53kgs before.I always not satisfy about myself at that weight.I just want 52kgs.So I have to keep my mind up.
I know how you are feeling.So I think the best thing is if you cant make urself to be confident with that weight,just try to lose it.(only in the healthy way). Never give up if you think that is wrong.You can make it right.
If you think you live and treat yourself healthily but still at that shape.So just be honest and accept yourself.I saw many gal with chubby body,they are happy and funny and make people around happy too.I love to be around them.
Someone who love you because who you are.
In your case,I think you should told her about what you are feeling about yourself and about what you are afraid about ur weight.Make her be ready.I think it's good to not let people hoping too much,because when they are showing disapointed from what they've seen,it gonna let you very down.
Anyway,just be acceptable.And good luck to you.

"Open your heart as well as your eyes"

I have to agree with the above comments that say it's all about confidence. I am not ashamed to say that I am 275 lbs. I have no problem meeting/dating girls because of my weight. I go up to any girl I think is attractive usually in bars/clubs/bookstores/bus stops/wherever and chat her up. And, because I'm fat, my definition of what's attractive I think is definitely wider than when I was thinner. I know how it feels to be teased or looked down because I'm this weight. I was sad and angry. Then, I realized I don't give a fuck what those closed-minded people think. I AM BEAUTIFUL!!! I may not be perfect. But you know what? Nobody is! Anyone that tries to tell you that or acts like that, is lying to themselves. Plus, there is more to me than my weight. I may be a fat girl, but I am also a daughter, sister, cousin, friend, co-worker, and human. I am funny, smart, sexy, kind, and romantic. I have a lot to offer and if someone I am interested in cannot look past my weight, then they are not worth another minute of my time.

Now with that being said, I'm currently beginning an increadible journey of a lifestyle change. I'm going to be more healthy. I am going to loose weight through good ol' fashioned diet and exercise. But not because I feel bad about being heavy, but because I cannot walk to the mailbox without getting winded. I know that when become more healthy I will not discriminate against the fat girl, because I know what it's like. I've been there. All types of women are sexy as long as they let their personalities and confidence shine through. :)

But the only time weight could be an issue is if you are so fat that you can not fit through your own front door of the house and have to get into the house through the back glass sliding doors that lead to your backyard. 

Thanks guys! I definitely feel much better knowing this.

How would I show my current weight? Post more revealing (of my weight) photos on myspace? Go ahead and message her that I'm not exactly happy about my weight (or that I'm sort of "curvy"?)

It just depends on the woman.  It's not necessarily about the number on the scale, as much as it is the overall size of the person.  160 lbs. on one person is gonna appear different on another person of the same weight.  Although appearance is important (in terms of lifestyle, character, etc.), I'm more of a case-by-case person.  People are starting to get carried away with their prerequsites for people when they wouldn't want those imposed on them. Also, a person can pass the visual checklist completely and still be devoid of anything worthwhile as a person.  Line up a dozen women against a wall and chances are I'll find something visually passable on all twelve (then again, I live near a college campus).  Once you do that, you move on to internal character (intellectual passability).

There are legitimate reasons to not get involve with people who don't have adequate appearances, but most people don't point them out and go the shallow, pandering, patronizing, sycophant route.  If you get involved with someone whose appearance is overshadowed with clear and concise health and negative lifestyle issues (cigarettes, alcohol, drugs, morbid obesity, lack of cleanliness, not dressed appropriately), more likely than not you'd be enabling them and they'd get worse. Since they're having success,  they'll see no reason to change their erroneous ways.  That's probably how the person came about living that lifestyle in the first place: someone close to them was either entangled in it with them or turned a blind eye and allowed complacency.  I'm all for makeovers but they have to make sense and be about encouragement, empowerment, and enhancement.  I mean, you can't turn a black person white, a short person tall, a Indonesian woman into an Irish women.  

To JJP: I'm sorry I hurt you.  Please forgive me so our wounds will heal.  God is gracious.

If you  are honest with each other since the beginning then there is no problem!. If she likes you enough to go on a blind date then im guessing she doesnt mind?. It would be better if you tell her about it discreetly , that way she wont go WOAH! whe she sees you, you know?. Is more of a personal answer though. Although you should/might be able to judge her reaction according to what you know of her up to this point??. 

Personally I dont mind, unless shes too big to not fit anywhere!. I like to go out and have fun and say, a girl that doesn fit on a rollercoaster ride is a no no! XD

First of all, good job with the weight loss! I know how hard it is to lose 10, so kudos for getting that far already <3 I lost 10 a few weeks ago, and then got sick/stressed and gained it all back. Woohoo. I need to get back on that :'D

Anyway, I don't really mind much, I actually prefer girls who are taller/a little bigger than I am because I'm self conscious about my weight. I'm 5"2 and 150lbs. 

On other people though, I don't actually like really skinny girls. I'm afraid I'll break them If i hug them too hard. I like healthy girls who have some meat on them, if that makes sense? 

if you guys already know eachother's personality, and if she does like you for yourself, i dont see how your weight would affect anything.

haha. I am petite and thin. I remember one time, I was standing near a tree and someone I knew stated "where are you Tara?". The tree completely covered me. Haha. 

To answer you question, I personally would like someone to be petitie like me.  I feel I would be uncomfortable with dating someone who is much bigger than I. I look younger than my age so I feel if the person is bigger (and taller even though I do like tall women), I could be seen as a child/little sister to her.  But I will not rule out on not dating someone because of their weight, though.

See, what Tara is saying is what the problem I am having.

If she was a few inches taller than me, I wouldn't be worried right now.

But this girl is a couple inches shorter.

I have a friend who is 5'10, but she seems miles taller than me because she is a pretty big girl (200lbs). Meanwhile there is a girl in my class who looks like a model (115), who is the same height but I could swear she is only an inch or two taller than me.

I don't think weight is really a big issue. I've fallen for girls of all body types. One of my best friends weighs about the same as you, she's very curvy and I think very pretty. For me it's all about facial expressions, like smiling alot, and a personality that I can relate to. I think girls of any size and weight might get self esteem issues and see themselves as fat. I'm about 133 right now and have a D size chest which I used to be really self-conscious about, so I never used to wear V necks or anything tight. If you feel good in your body and don't care about your size, other people won't either.

I tend to think that a person who I can be in a relationship with will find me attractive no matter what I look life. Shallow people aren't worth my time, anyway.

If you want to lose weight, do it the right way. Make long-term goals and incorporate losing weight into a lifestyle change. Better health should be your motive, not just losing weight. And don't diet! Just go for more fruits and vegetables, fewer processed foods and snacks, and limit your red meat intake. Exercise is good too. I hate running, but love yoga and pilates, so find something that you enjoy and commit to doing it 3 days a week and then gradually increasing the duration and intensity and doing it more times a week. I've found it really works and you have so much more energy.

Stay positive =) 

My girlfriend is a big girl, she weighs 170, I weigh like 127 or something like that. She has a gorgeous face and I always thought she was beautiful for her size before we were together, but when we started talking it sort of bothered me. Then I realized that I was being shallow and it was messed up. It doesn't matter that she isn't a carbon copy of what the mass media defines as beautiful, shes beautiful the way she is and she has a stunning personality and it makes her damn sexy. It means nothing to me that she isn't skinny with huge boobs and a 4pack. You are about the same size as her and my advice to you is to stop worrying about it and just work it, ya know? If someone cares about your size then obviously they aren't worth your time.

I have learned to love her body, through loving her.

I'm personally not really physically attracted to larger woman.  Curves are great, of course, but a lot of extra weight is a turn-off for me, unless they're a pretty fit person.  A thin girl with an unhealthy lifestyle would also be a turn-off, for the record.  I guess it's more about the fitness and lifestyle than the weight per se for me.

However, I'll add to the OP that it's just a date, I wouldn't stress about it too much.  She's seen your photos and she wants to meet you so it shouldn't be an issue.

I looove thick thighs and hips on a woman so obviously your weight wouldn't bother me. It just depends on what type the individual likes and obviously if she's seen pictures of you she already knows what you look like and if you've made a connection already I'm sure if she sees your curves as "imperfections" (I have no idea how she could) than I'm sure she'd overlook them if she really likes you.

The heart has its reasons which reason knows not of.

IMHO, weight does matter a bit. I don't really care about the actual number, but a girl should be fit, or if she is a bit heavier, curvaceous. Its all about proportion; some people look great with an extra bit of weight on, and some people look horrible. And, she can't be too skinny either, cause thats just scary.

Obviously you can't lose all the weight you'd like to before your date, so you just need to project confidence (fake it if you have to!) and be yourself! If you're feeling a bit self-conscious, you can mention in conversation that you've taken up a new sport for fun (running? tennis?) so she'll get the picture that your body is "under construction" and you're trying to lose weight, but won't sound like "I'm fat, I hate my body."

Don't give up on your goals, but don't hide yourself away until you're at your ideal size. No matter how big you are, theres ALWAYS someone out there who will love you just the way you are. The fattest guy in the world got married a few months ago! If he can find love, anyone can; you just have to have confidence.

I've got an update guys!

We went on our date not too long ago, and even though I think I messed up and talked way too much sometimes, I think we hit it off =] Nothing happened on the date, but she texted me after saying she had a great time and asked me out on a second one!

Oh, also, by the time we went on the date, I weighed 162. Not that 8 pounds had anything effect, other than maybe confidence?

I don't know. All i can say is thank you so much guys! You really helped me realize how much I needed to have self-confidence. I think it really helped!

Now I'm just dealing with what I'm dealing with in other thread. Taking the next step =]

I say no. I met this young woman (probably...early twenties) and she was overweight. I thought she was so beatiful--inside and out.

≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈≈

“We all die. The goal isn't to live forever, the goal is to create something that will.” --Chuck Palahniuk

When I was 16 I was about 5'7" and weighed about 220 (I'm not as big now so it's something I don't enjoy admitting) and I am definately "pear shaped", so I know where your jitters are coming from. I think the important issue that needs to be addressed is your own body image. You've probably heard this line before but 170 really isn't that heavy. I'm sure you're being harder on yourself than you should be. 

In this world of photoshopped images and anorexic celebrities its eay for things to become distorted. A little meat on the bones is nothing to be ashamed of. Personally I would rather be dating a girl who's 170 than 130; the girl at 170 is going to have more curves and be better filled out. Its easy to look in the mirror and see every one of your flaws, after all, you're your biggest (and worst) critic. Its important to realize that most of us have a distorted body image, I know I do.

Your date itsn't going to notice every little negagtive thing that you think about yourself. Actually she'll probably be nervous going into the date about her own body and how attractive she is, no matter how much she weighs. Just go on your date wearing something that makes you feel comfortable in your own skin and try to be confident. I know when I'm meeting a girl for the first time I'm much more concerned with confidence, personality and character than what size jean she is wearing. I'm sure you'll do fine :)