Coming out while in a hetero relationship?

If your in a monogamous relationship and your still in love/attracted to your boyfriend I don't think he needs to know something that could hurt him and make him feel insecure.Unless you have the type of relationship where your secure enough to already admit when you find someone attractive otherwise i'd keep quite.If you really need to talk to someone about your feeling of bisexuality try a friend,family member or even a LGBT help line.

Now if your relationship isn't so happy then maybe you should discuss the issue as it might be contributing to any problems your relationship is having and getting everything out in the open may help things.I guess for me it would come down to how happy my relationship was and if the feelings i'm having are something I want to act on because if they are it's only fair to tell him the truth first before you do anything about them.

I am expressing my opinion here so take what you need and leave the rest alone. Why are you in straight relationship? If I may ask? You should ask yourself too.

 It's natural to  discover same gender attraction now, but have you always had an attraction to womyn before you settled down? I agree with babyface30. It's something you may not want to discuss with your male partner until you're a 1000% sure your attraction and feelings are authentic towards womyn. Please seek an LGBTQI counselor before doing so.  Attraction is one thing? Having feelings and seeing yourself with a womyn and having a life together is another? Will you be prepared to come out  and face being a minority once you're sure? Do you know LGBTQI issues at hand? Legal rights you have and don't have? Some womyn come out after being in a relationship with a man and couldn't handle being ostracized by others and went back in the closet again b/c of legal issues.

I guess I'm telling you to face truth and reality. You're life will forever change.

Sorry to sound harsh but some of  us has walked the line of fire after coming out. As for me, I ask for Divine protection while have and still going through it!

Don't get me wrong. I'm blessed and happy and not ashamed.

 

i can't believe anyone would tell you to hide who you are and lie to someone you love. I'm so happy to hear you came out to him and that he's supportive.

It's about being considerate to your partners feelings,like I said if your happy and you don't intend to act on those feelings for women it's not necessary to make your partner feel insecure by telling them.In a way it's you being selfish and wanting unburden yourself at the expense of your partners feelings,unless you already have an open and completely honest type of relationship then it's not always a good idea to bring it up.I did tell an ex-boyfriend about my feeling of bisexuality and it did damage the relationship because he felt insecure and that I would want another woman-I would just advise people to think about the consequences before telling.

I'm glad Whimsey Roo that your boyfriend is supportive he sounds like a nice guy and I hope everything goes well for you whether it's in that relationship or in a same sex relationship in the future.

As for LGBTQ counselling try the net first and look up LGBTQ support in your area in the country you live in,that should get you an email address and some info about counselling etc.There are also helplines you can phone and again that should be on the net. 

I came out to my close friends as bi while I was going out with a guy. I just made sure I talked to them and tried to explain bisexuality to them when i came out. I've since broken up with him and had a huge crush on a lesbian girl I was thinking of asking out, and my friends knew about this entire situation and it seemed to be a little eye opening for them. Not that they didn't originally believe me, but I thiink they didn't get it until they watched me go through rejection by a girl and that it was just like when I've gotten rejected by guys.

That's never fun. I was in a two year relationship with a guy when I finally came to terms with myself as a lesbian. The worst feeling was when I had a short relationship with a girl from camp while we were "taking a break", and when I came back he had recorded a CD for me. (he's an amazing guitarist and singer) I ended up breaking up with him, and waiting till he was happy in a year long relationship with a different girl to come out.

But if you're bi and still have feelings for him, then I don't see the real need to come out. Unless you're unhappy with him, in which case you need to think about your sexuality more and maybe think about breaking it off with him.

We often don't have any control of how things unfold, only how we respond to them. Sometimes we don't realize things about ourselves until certain circumstances arise causing us to face them. Through my childhood, adolecence and college years I found myself seriously crushin' and literally falling head over heels for various girls from afar but I always repressed or ignored those feelings because at that time in my life I didn't know how to go about expressing such feelings let alone know if doing so was okay. It wasn't until I was three months shy of getting married that I discovered that my subsequent attractions to women along with my attractions to men could mean that I was possibly bisexual. At first I left the idea alone assuming that once I was married my same sex feelings would disappear. A year later the feelings only intensified. I started to take things more seriously and began to do a lot of soul searching and self examination. Three years into my marriage I came to the realization that the concept of bisexuality best fit what I had been experiencing internally for most of my life. For some people coming to such a realization isn't much of a deal. For some it is. For me it was and therefore I felt it was best for me to be open with my husband about it. Holding it all in was tearing me about. It was a risk but I'm glad that I opened up to him about it. He's been understanding and supportive. Opening up about one's sexuality is a personal decision that only you can make. It can be risky but it also can be rewarding in regards to allowing your true self to show. If you feel that you are in an environment where you can be comfortable opening up about your sexuality then feel free to do so. If you don't feel comfortable then don't. But don't allow others to convince that you shouldn't when you feel that you should or that you should when you don't feel comfortable doing so.