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Going to a gay bar for the first time...help!Okay so i came out to my (gay) best friend, and now he's taking me to a gay bar. The upstairs is supposed to be where all the lesbians hang out. The thing is i dont know what to do! Im scared! I dont dance so thats out, and im quite shy when i first meet ppl. Whats a girl to do? I love women but they make me so nervous! also would it look weird if i went to a predominantly lesbian bar with a gay man? i would go with a lesbian cept i dont know any! am i supposed to talk to someone?? or just hang out with my friend? i have no clue what i have to do!!! i need help AfterElleners!!! Submitted by sarah (3 posts) on March 19, 2008 - 11:30pm. |
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woo don't worry this much!!!
It's not weird to go with a gay man ! there's tons of girls who go to lesbians bars with them (unless it's one of those places where men aren't allowed to go).
Keep it cool, just try to have fun with your friend and do whatever you want to do! If you want to meet people then go ahead and say something to someone, don't be there waiting all night for someone to say something to you (who knows if that someone is thinking the same you're thinking and that's why she doesn't say anything!)
Have funnn!!!:)
I'm shy too. Aaah, it
I'm shy too. Aaah, it sucks doesn't it? OK. Smile. You're cute. I'm sure you're cuter when you smile because everyone is and smiling people come off as friendly, even when they're terrified. Get a drink so you have something to do with your hands. Say hello to someone. Compliment her wrist cuff. Conversation ensues.
Hmm, predictable conversation topics:
Do you come here a lot? Where else do people hang out? I'm pretty new to this scene. Are you from around here? Do you want to dance? (Even if you hate dancing, some liquid courage might inspire you.) You could talk about a recent episode of the L Word, or about if you'd like to make out while waiting in line at the bar. You know, whatever.
You're hilarious!
I have the same problem. I
I have the same problem. I haven't even been to a gay bar yet because my social anxiety is so bad. Hell, even at a regular bar I'm usually so shy I can barley ask the bartender for a drink. But then after I get a drink or two in me I'm very talkative. I'm nervous just THINKING about YOU going to a new bar. That's how bad it is.
Anyway, it's good you're going with a friend. Even if he's a gay guy. Which I don't think is weird. I have the same gay guy friend. Just get some drinks in you. Or who knows, maybe some lovely lady will buy one for you. ;) But yeah, have fun. Don't over think about it. Strike up random conversations. Ask questions you probally already know the answere to like "hey...do you know who sings this song?" "love your shoes, where did you get them?" haha. You know. "hey...got a girlfriend?"