Hey, I'm in Grad school right now to become a physician assistant. It is important for your doctor to know about your sexual history because it could be very important in a differential diagnosis. Your doctor should have used open ended questions like... "Are you sexually active or are you in a relationship? If you replied yes..are you dating a male or female? They are not suppose to assume that you are heterosexual. That just poor history taking. I don't know how old your doctor is or where you are from, but that can make a difference. If you are comfortable telling your doctor you should. He/She is required by law to keep in confidential. I'm not saying there won't be any discrimination because doctors are people too and have biases, but if she/he has been trained well it shouldn't matter. Don't worry, there is a big focus now in the field to address gay and lesbian issues. I hoped this helped.

P.S. What I find funny is that your situation was on a video about history taking. And it was used as an example of what not to do when taking a history from a patient.

P.S.S. Sexual history is also important to your ophthalmologist because some sexually transmitted diseases can be diagnosed through an eye exam. :)~

So I can't really compete with a physician assistant since they obviously know their shit but I can speak from experience. Get straight (in the honesty way) with your doctor, get to know them well, and make sure they know your concerns. I had an interesting couple of experiences with doctors in my old college town.

One (which I didn't know before I walked in, and by the time I found out it was too late to walk out) was Christian based and that was one of the most awkward times to get a pap... ended up in one of the most awkward moments of my life. Sat up and pretty much had to explain to them that I was at the time in a monogamous relationship with a woman... I ended up gettin questions about using toys and shit... really bizarre. Didn't feel like it was useful at all. Was more of the intrusive inquiring kind of thing. Never went back.

The other one kept telling me I shouldn't worry about STDs if I haven't had sex with a man... That was the university health center... I think they were just trying to cut corners there.

Yeah. I would say it (coming out or whatever) does make a difference and it also makes a difference to be educated besides because apparently somewhere along the line, not all physicians are trained equally or as well. The one doctor I really do trust has pretty much been completely honest with me about the stuff I need to be aware of and why. One thing she made clear to me (and this may vary, and who knows, she could totally be wrong) was that lesbians in monogamous relationships typically don't need to get paps more than one every two years which is a year less than straight women... I would say that matters.

I think the fundamental thing about your doctor is that you need to build a relationship with him or her. If you don't feel comfortable with a doctor... you need to find someone else. Plain and simple. Mine happens to be a woman and is chiller than shit. Those (I am finding more often than not) are hard to find.

"Is it necessary for a physician, ob/gyn, dentist, opthomologist (I'm kidding about the last two) to know your sexual preference? "

-Well, you might want to let your dentist or opthamologist know if they are hot females...but, I digress as you were kidding.    As for your PCP or OB/GYN, it would be nice if they were taught to take better histories as the previous responer wrote and not assume, but that's usually not the case.  I can't think of a medical reason because why would it play into a differential diagnosis?  So I suppose it is up to you. 

"Does your doctor know?"  Yes, for a few reasons:  I don't have a problem telling anyone now, so when they do the sexually active/birth control questions I tell my doc so there isn't that weird pause when you say yes to sexually active and no to birth control.  I have had a variety of responses, some good, some idiotic.  One said to me years later when I saw him again, "I wouldn't have refused to do the the hysterectomy if I knew you were gay"  (I had told him, apparently he forgot)---as if being a lesbian equals not wanting children??? 

On the positive side, the guy who did the hysterectomy knew I was gay and discussed the loss of giving birth issue--don't think I'll ever regret that but it was right for him to explore it.

Re: stupid question, proper forum.....I don't think it's stupid, as for the forum, I am new here so I really don't know but given what I've read on this site I don't think you need to stress about that.  The people seem verrrry cool.

Anyway....I actually did tell my dentist who was kind of flirting while numbing me up, I think it sounded something like "acthuallly Ih'm a lesthbia."

My experiences have varied across the board from the most idiotic response I've ever heard from anyone, lest not someone who is supposed to be an educated health professional - "What is a lesbian? What do you mean you have sex with women?" (Uni health centre) to "ok, are you currently in a relationship with a woman?"

I always tell the doctors (I have to keep repeating myself because I visit super-centres and don't have just one doctor, and they're forgetful and I believe cannot legally make a note of it on your record.. although the most recent doctor wrote 'celebrant' on mine. I think she meant 'celebate' but I digress) as it's very important to your health ... it also *usually* stops them asking you stupid questions like "is it possible you're pregnant?" and "are you sure?" and "are you really certain of that?"

Although I do have a hint for the first doctor (what is a lesbian lady)... a celebate lesbian cannot get pregnant!!! No matter how many times you ask the question *eye roll*

So yeah, find yourself a doctor you are comfortable with, and make sure they know.

Also to whoever said Doctors aren't meant to assume you're heterosexual... sadly, they do.

Let's see. I've had a few doctors:

OB/GYN in America: It was the only time I saw him (walk-in clinic kind of deal) so it was a case of he didn't ask and I didn't tell. Had I answered the "are you sexually active?" question in a more efficient way though, I probably wouldn't have had to be so insistent that no, I don't need birth control. C'est la vie.

GP #1: They knew and were pretty cool about it. My partner came along to all of my appointments and they made sure to include her in the conversation and also made notes about her (in a good way, of course).

GP #2: ...is not really very nice and I've only seen him once. It hasn't come up thus far, although I wouldn't hesitate to tell him if I thought it would be relevant (probably because if he didn't like it then I'd have an excuse to get a new doctor, which I wouldn't mind!).

Hospital/Fracture Clinic: I broke my foot 6 weeks ago and have gone in to the clinic about four times since then for various check-ups and things. Every time, without fail, a nurse comes over and whispers, "Could you possibly be pregnant?" It really threw me off the first time (I'm pregnant?! What?!) but now it's just funny. Since this is strictly for my foot I don't feel it's relevant to tell them I'm a lesbian. My partner goes to all of the appointments with me and I would tell them if they were to stop her from coming in with me. ("It's okay. She's my civil partner.")

So the moral of my story is that I don't volunteer it as the first thing, "Hello, I'm Koma and I'm a lesbian!" but if it's a long-term or important doctor/patient relationship, I make sure they know whenever possible.

True happiness, we are told, consists in getting out of one's self, but the point is not only to get out, you must stay out; and to stay out you must have some absorbing errand. -Henry James

Well considering I live in a quite liberal city you'd be surprised by exactly how many doctors just assume you're straight and give you the "are you on birth control" lecture, yada yada. I've been to all the nurse practioners at one time or another for the Ob-Gyn and I swear they all just assume I'm straight based on my long hair only. Like they are afraid to say "well, do you have sex with women then?" although there are some patients that would get mad at that question. Anyway, I've told whoever I thought really needed to know for medical purposes, or else just told them because they were liberal seeming, or just because I felt like it... but sometimes it's easier to just pretend I'm straight although I'm a bit surprised that some of these doctors would truly believe it and all.

Having moved around quite a lot in the past dozen years, I've had several different doctors, but the experiences have been very similar.

Although doctors aren't supposed to assume every one of their patients is straight, they all do. I'm used to the drill at this point. They invariably ask about birth control, in most cases before even asking if I'm sexually active. To the question, "what method of birth control do you use?", I say, none. This answer provokes 'the speech', the condescending little talk about how important birth control is, why it's so vitally urgent for women to use it, yada, yada, yada. I let them yammer on for a little while, before telling them I'm gay, which, fortunately, has never received a nasty response. I've always been greeted with reactions that run the gamut from embarrassed to businesslike, but have never gotten condemnation, or, as one poster mentioned, questions about sex toys! That's just weird. How do such clueless idiots get to be doctors???

Speaking as a doctor, it's very, very important to let your PCP or GP (and especially your ob/gyn) know what your sexual orientation is... and I think Clowie hit at some of the main reasons why, so I won't repeat, except to say that one additional benefit is it allows your doctor to tailor care to you. 

And even though it's annoying, we always have to ask if there's a chance a young woman could be pregnant, even if they're lesbian, because it's something you never want to miss, and you never KNOW for a fact that they haven't had sex recently with a man.  The patient may know, but you don't know for absolute sure and it could affect their care.   If it's your clinic patient and you've been seeing her for years, I think it would be safer to assume they're not, but I tend to only see people once (being in the ER), so I personally have to be annoying and ask.   I would NEVER give a gay woman a lecture on birth control though... unless they had sex with men too... but I would certainly remind her to be have safe sex.  Because unsafe sex can lead to STDs which can lead to PID which causes abdominal pain, which necessitates a trip to the ER, which is when I end up seeing them. 

That all said, many doctors DO tend to assume that their patients are straight, even though we're not supposed to.  Older doctors in particular do.  Some medical schools are starting to teach a lot more about gay/lesbian health issues (mine was really good about it), but you will always end up having wackos in every class.  We had a particular idiot who went on this rant once how he was Christian and had to treat Christian people first and gay patients were this and that... it was horrible.  On the bright side, it made our straight physicians-in-training aware that our gay patients may have good reason to avoid trusting their doctor with such info! 

I don't tell my dentist b/c I don't think it's relevant.  I wouldn't tell my ophthamologist if I had one, because also not relevant (unless I had a systemic disease affecting my eye).  My PCP or GP though should know - except I don't have one yet b/c I just moved!! 

And sorry if my post is long or rambly... I am just coming off a series of night shifts and am SO exhausted!!!  :)

I suppose it's worth mentioning that a small portion of the population (I don't know if this includes doctors or not, because they really should know better) believe that lesbians can't get HIV/AIDS. This probably won't be an issue for 99.999% of lesbians getting an HIV test, but I still think it's worth mentioning because lesbians can become infected through sexual activities. Don't let anybody convince you otherwise.

True happiness, we are told, consists in getting out of one's self, but the point is not only to get out, you must stay out; and to stay out you must have some absorbing errand. -Henry James

Like Smokin' said - Just ask when you have regular blood work done or ask your regular doctor.  You don't have to go to an OBGYN or discuss your orientation or anything.  :) 

_________

"If you go flying back through time, and you see somebody else flying forward into the future, it's probably best to avoid eye contact." - Jack Handey

My recent exprience with my new doctor at the local clinic in London was asking all the typical questions above and naturally assumed I'm having sex with men as i am on the birth control pill but for different reasons when asked "when was the last time i had sex and did i use protection?" i just blurted im a lesbian....! she was fine after a second of surprised look on her face, after a few more questions she handed me  packets of condoms!! i told her i dont need them! she said its protocall and then handed me safe sex pamplet (for straight people might i add) leaving me rather bewildered and amusing story to tell. 

"car dy cymydog fel ti dy hun"

My doctor asked me if I needed birth control once, and rather than coming out to her(I don't think it's her business), i just told her that I’ll let her know if i need it. She hasn't asked again.

What are you using for birth control?

Sodomy, population control the fun way.

I went in for my check up with my gyno recently, and they just went computerized. So I had to spend 30 minutes filling out all this paperwork online, and when it can to sexual history I was surprised to see it asked which sex you prefer (this is a pretty conservative town). I was even more surprised that I had three choices.....men, women, or both.

I also asked to get tested for STDs and HIV since it had been awhile, and my insurance finally pays for it (I think), and she didn't ask why. Just asked me to sign the consent form.

I have only seen my GP once; I see my endocrinologist the most, and we have no reason to discuss my sex life. The man hates making small talk with me as it is; he would freak if I brought up my sexuality. Although it could be entertaining....

Yeah it's important that any doctor or therapist know your sexual orientation because they're treating the whole person and for the other reasons. If you're not comfortable letting your doctor know, find another doctor who you do trust. If it's simply disclosing to people, maybe it would be helpful for you to examine why you're not comfortable doing so. Being lesbian is no big deal to doctors and as someone said, it's part of your sexual history. As you get older,  your doctor may want you to start mammograms earlier because being childless makes the risk factor greater since 80% of breast cancer is hormone driven. I remember once when seeing a new dr I mentioned that I was gay and single in response to a question and he said, "good." so I asked him, "good that I'm lesbian or good that I'm single." he laughed.

Not to overstate the obvious, but women can give each other STDS, although female to female infection isn't as common as male to female or male to male.

~Talk Derby to me.~

i agree that your doctor should know if you're a lesbian but i usually don't say anything unless i have to. i've had negative experiences with homophobic doctors in the past and i am uncomfortable even going to the doctor. it just so happens that i'm always sick and therefore always at the hospital for some random reason.

last year i had an allergic reaction to shellfish which was a big surprise because i had never been allergic before. anyway, my throat swelled closed and i couldn't swallow or even speak. they started me on an i.v., took some blood, and all that good stuff. then the nurse comes in and says i have to take a pee test to see if i'm pregnant. i kept shaking my head no and she kept saying that the doctor insisted. i finally gave up and peed in the cup. the bill comes and it cost $50 for me to pee in that cup.

it was so frustrating because here i am in pain and unable to speak and i felt like i was being ignored. i now carry a notepad and pen with me wherever i go and a note in my wallet that says "lesbian and not pregnant" just in case.

...and a memo was sent around about 2 years ago as nurses weren't asking patients about their sexuality upon admission.

Basically, there's 12 activities of daily living that need to be filled out on admission. These range from nutrition (can the patient feed herself/dietary needs, etc) to elimination (colostomys/catheters/normally) to expression of spirituality & finally expression on sexuality. All of these (there's 8 more, I was just giving examples) are required to understand the patient more thoroughly. Therefore, her provision of care will be more efficient.

My doctor doesn't know I'm a lesbian. He knows I work in healthcare and, to be honest, treats me more like a colleague than a patient. He even got really embarrassed when I had to take my top off (I injured my shoulder when a patient collapsed. I thought I was fine, but my shoulder and muscles just around my ribs and above my breast hurt like hell. He had to check for breaks.)

I almost did tell him once when he insisted on giving me a pregnancy test. Then he wanted to put me on the pill. When I told him neither were necessary, he looked at me like I was into celibacy. Eugh! It's been over a year since I needed to see him.

"Happiness is not a pleasure, it's victory."

- Zig Ziglar