Bollywood is bi-curious in “3 Nights 4 Days”

This just in: There will be a bisexual female character in the new Bollywood film, 3 Nights 4 Days, but she’s not a murderer plotting revenge against some girl’s boyfriend! That’s a relief.

The movie boasts a cast full of, as of now, no-name newcomers playing a group of college friends who reunite in Goa for a wedding. Since Goa is notorious for being a 24-hour party island, things get interesting when the old friends, whose “personalities and ideologies” have changed since graduating from Pune University three years ago, party, catch up and hook up.

One of the friends, Zoha (played by Madhuri Bhattacharya), is the is disowned by her “affluent Hyderabadi Muslim family” because of her bisexuality, but leads a successful life as a fashion designer. She’s also described as having “average looks and sharp brains,” which is definitely a breath of fresh air from the oversexed bimbos in some other Bollywood films. Luckily, though, her looks are far from average.

Zoha is now known for her bisexuality in the fashion world after being linked to a high-profile fashion designer, making headlines everywhere. Her storyline also includes her longtime crush on best friend Antara, the “hot and sexy babe” (gag me) that was sex-crazed and flirtatious back in college. Let’s hope that Zoha isn’t some experiment for her best friend, who would most likely sleep with anything that moves.

I’m a tough critic when it comes to Bollywood movies — i.e. I rarely watch any — and honestly, the movie sounds pretty lame to me. The plot line is boring and reminds me of St. Elmo’s Fire with its college reunion theme. It would be nice if Zoha’s bisexuality were developed in a positive way, but this type of C-list film only cares about salaciousness and profit-making. In other words, don’t get your hopes up.

As a queer Desi, I’m still waiting for the film that shows a big fat Bollywood lesbian wedding — preferably starring me and my hot Bollywood actress partner — with beautiful saris, Indian food galore and spontaneous bursting into dance numbers in which everyone already knows the choreography. But alas, I might have to keep dreaming for a long, long time.

What do you think of Zoha? Anyone a Bollywood fan?

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