If you’re trying to decide what movie to see this weekend, and you’re tempted to see Deck the Halls because it co-stars Kristin Chenoweth and Kristin Davis…don’t. The movie, of which only 11% of the reviews on Rotten Tomatoes are positive, is about two neighbors who have it out after one of them decorates his house for the holidays so brightly that it can be seen from space – or as The Hollywood Reporter summarizes, “Two alpha males (Matthew Broderick, Danny DeVito) living across the street from each other turn Christmas into a contest that trashes any and all yuletide traditions”. My favorite line is from the Minneapolis Star‘s review, which calls it “the film equivalent of a fruitcake or snowman sweater you don’t want but can’t regift.”
I like a dysfunctional Christmas movie as much as the next person – watching National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation is actually a cherished holiday tradition in my family – but the very concept of this movie is stupid. Maybe it would be funny as a 5-minute Saturday Night Live skit, but even then, I’m not sure that wouldn’t be 4 minutes too long. I hate to stereotype, but I will anyway: it’s such a straight guy’s idea of a Christmas movie. In addition to the movie’s mine-is-bigger-than-yours contest, only in a male fantasy (or Hollywoodland, but I repeat myself) would either of the Kristin’s marry schlubs like these. At least, I hope.