MoviesReviews

Sapphic Cinema: “Imagine Me & You”

Luce’s mother is somewhat shrewish and spends the entire film complaining about her lack of sexual satisfaction, though clearly she got it on somewhat recently because Rachel’s sister is, like, eight.

I WAS AN ACCIDENT!

That’s H. Her thing is that she asks random questions, which would be an unbearably twee affectation were it not or the fact that the actress playing her is a genuinely odd child, who delivers all her lines as if she’s passionately interested in something happening just off-camera, and it is delightful.

We meet all these fine people on Rachel’s wedding day, on which she is marrying The Nicest Man In The World, Heck.

Heck is loving, and kind, and makes adorable jokes about jam. His sole fault is that he works at a job where he yells numbers and those numbers are LIES.

I love that it is impossible not to be invested in Heck’s welfare since one of my all-time least favorite lesbian movie tropes is that there are no emotional consequences to breaking some poor dude’s heart. That does a tremendous disservice to bisexuality and to the trauma of coming out while you’re in a straight relationship, and this is one of precious few films not guilty of perpetuating it.

Heck’s best friend is Cooper, that “trollop who would shag an open wound.” I think he’s just there so there would be another dude on the poster.  He is garbage and somehow thinks it’s cute to continue trying to fuck Luce even after she tells him to please stop. The less said about him, the better.

So it’s Rachel’s wedding day, and her florist is Luce (Lena Headey, a hawk goddess who decided to try a lifetime in human form, just for a laugh) who provides the residents of London with tasteful bouquets and free therapy. (“He was just a dog and you shouldn’t have loved him more than me” is still my favorite line in the whole movie.) Luce’s mother is depressed in the most British way possible, which she describes in terms of snooker and tea. Luce’s best friend is the ecstatically gay Edie, about whom I would watch several movies, preferably action-comedies in which she has to steal artifacts or something.

Rachel is halfway down the aisle when she and Luce make eye contact, and in that brief moment, her life is blown to rainbow-colored smithereens.

SO, DRINK LATER?
OH FOR SURE. JUST LET ME WRAP THIS UP REAL QUICK.

They meet properly at the reception, where Luce goes punch-diving to rescue Rachel’s wedding ring.

YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE I’D LIKE TO STICK MY ENTIRE HAND INTO?

After the wedding, Rachel and Luce start hanging out, because Rachel thinks that Luce is her soul mate. Not in an inappropriate way, just in the way where another woman is all you think of and you want to listen to your favorite songs on the same pair of earbuds so they can be her favorite songs too and you always have to try on three different shirts before you hang out.  You know, in a friend way. She’s already a little alarmed by the intensity of her feelings, and when she finds out Luce is gay, the equivalent of a hydrogen bomb goes off in her head.

Lesbian Apparel and Accessories Gay All Day sweatshirt -- AE exclusive
Previous page 1 2 3 4Next page

Related Articles

Leave a Reply

Back to top button