Last summer I made my first
trek to the San Diego Comic Con and oh, honey … the sights I done saw!
Liv Tyler speaking Elvish to appease a ballroom full of nerds … a
dude dressed like a 300 Spartan yet decidedly lacking a 300
Spartan’s body … miles and miles of crap that no one needs yet everyone
desperately wants … an amputee model all done up like Rose McGowan
in Planet Terror … and $5 pretzels. Yes, I said five-dollar
pretzels. What’s up with that, Comic Con? Do I not
hunger yet deserve affordable snacks? Am I made out of money?
What am I, Goldfinger? Do I smell like Elizabeth Taylor’s
White Diamonds? No, I assure you that I most certainly do not.
Although now that I think about
it, that might be lovely.
While everyone else at the
convention was drooling over the Iron Man trailer, I was drooling
(with anticipation, I swear) over the panel writer-director Neil
Marshall gave to talk about his upcoming “dark action thriller”
Doomsday. Marshall, you see, is the man responsible for two
of my favorite horror films: the 2002 “army vs. werewolves” flick
Dog Soldiers, and the 2006 “hot women go caving with disastrous
results” flick The Descent. Basically, I’d be willing
to give any film the guy does a shot; lucky for me, however, Doomsday
Marshall’s ode to postapocalyptic
movies like Escape From New York and The Road Warrior
has everything you could want in pure escapist entertainment: car chases,
weirdo eye makeup on crazy people, infections and quarantines, explosions,
mohawks, and a gun-totin’, sword-wieldin’, tank-top-wearin’ Rhona
Mitra. It’s the end of the world as we know it, and, uh … she
looks pretty damn fine.
Six months after I went goo-goo over the film and early clips in San Diego, the official trailer
has shown up online and I’m goo-goo
all over again. Check it out — everything you need to know about
the movie is crammed into two and a half minutes. If you’re as
geeky — no wait — I mean, if you’re as savvy as I am, you’ll
even spot MyAnna Buring, one of The Descent’s six chicks
with a pick.
All you really need to know about Doomsday, though, are two little
words: Rhona and Mitra.
Doomsday will be hitting
theaters on March 14. But as anxious as I am to see it, I’m
not sure if I’ll be able to. Comic Con is coming up soon, after
all, and I’d better start saving now if I plan on eating.