File this one under “Please don’t let it be true”: According to Nikki Finke of online rag
Deadline Hollywood Daily, Warner Brothers president of production Jeff Robinov has made
a new decree
stating that the studio will no longer make movies with women in lead roles. After that, he successfully negotiated to trade his Ecto Cooler for a Capri Sun and
received the Academy’s golden hall pass for a trip to the little boys’ room.
Oh, wait. I shouldn’t insult second graders like that. After all, Jeffy isn’t still growing, he’s a man — and must’ve gotten tired of being mistaken for a man with
a clue. Don’t worry, Robinov, we know Hollywood’s still an old boys’ network; no need to post the sign.
According to Finke’s sources (which she interprets as reliable), the decision is in response to the box office failure of The Brave One and Invasion.
Apparently Jodie Foster and Nicole Kidman are everything that’s wrong with movies these days.
This must be ever-so-slightly more complicated than men doing business with their brains between their legs, because otherwise these women would be safe.
Warner probably thinks they’re doing business with their wallets, but come on — both films were written, directed and produced by men, the latter
was notoriously difficult to make, and yet somehow the women are the ones to blame
for the lack of cash? Robinov needs to go back to grade school to learn math as well as socialization, because this equation just doesn’t add up.
Granted, the statement might not be true, but who are we kidding — the fact that folks
are responding means that we live in a world where it could be true, and that’s sad enough.
Equal rights attorney Gloria Allred gave a statement to Finke,
railing on the illogic of the decision and giving a call to arms: “If that studio confirms that their policy is to now exclude women as leads, then my policy would
be to boycott films made by Warner Bros.”
Since I tend to be a fan of films starring women, that shouldn’t be too hard; I’d be on board with a boycott in a minute. It’ll take me far longer to wrap my brain
around the idiocy of Robinov’s idea. What about all the flops starring men? Variety measured
last year’s bombs in a logical way — income to expense,
aka Budgeting 101 — and guess what? It’d be hard to pin most of these — All the King’s Men, Poseidon, The Wicker Man,
A Good Year — on the women involved, so should we stop signing Russell Crowe and Nic Cage, too?
On the flip side, Titanic remains at the top of the box office list in the States,
and I don’t care what Robinov might say — folks didn’t buy tickets just to see Leo DiCaprio.
Pay attention, Warner Brothers: When you put money and effort into a movie with a woman in the lead, you win 11 Oscars and earn box office returns that are, frankly, titanic.
Not that complicated, really — even a second grader can understand that.
Comments have ranged from dismissive
(since it’s just about the money, we shouldn’t be offended) to outraged (I can’t imagine why!) to hateful (of course — if he weren’t in good company,
Robinov wouldn’t dare to make a statement like this). Personally, I’m seething both at this particular plan and at the pervasive prejudice and
stupidity that it indicates. I don’t even want to know what other kind of comments get made in studio boardrooms.
As always, I’m curious what all of you think. Ready for a boycott, or too excited about
Oh, wait — I guess we can forget about that one.