When I was younger, I wanted nothing more than to go to the party in Clueless, the one where Tai bumps her head and sings “Rolling with the Homies” with Elton. As I grew older, I realized I would have hated having to drive to the Valley and hang out with mean girls like Ambular, so I probably would prefer a different kind of situation. So this week’s Huddle is dedicated to the on-screen parties we so wish we could RSVP for.
Lucy Hallowell: I never in the history of my entire life have thought “man I wish I was at that party.” I didn’t eat for days before my wedding because I was so nervous about having to talk to people, be the center of attention, and, you know, do bride stuff instead of sneaking off to hide like I do at every party. But I guess if I have to pick, I would say either the party in D.E.B.S. because then I would just get to sit in a booth, drink beer, and make snarky conversation with Lucy Diamond or the party at the end of Some Kind of Wonderful. I’d be in the car with Watts.
Heather Hogan: I’m with Lucy on this one. My idea of an awesome party is people I know and love sitting around drinking beer and talking about comic books or regular books or television or Quidditch or something like that. Or board games parties. I love board games. But I guess if I had to go to an actual party, I’d want to go to one of those ragers at Noel Kahn’s cabin like in Pretty Little Liars. Best case: You get to play truth or dare with Spencer AND Jenna. Worst case: The house eats you alive like it did to poor Maya.
Ali Davis: I mostly want to go to Hogan’s board game party. But if I could find an outfit and a mask, I wouldn’t mind checking out that freaky ballroom party in Labyrinth. You know, just to see.
Grace Chu: This house party in The L Word.
Elaine Atwell: My initial response was also The L Word house party from Season 5, but then I thought about how much all those women would terrify me in real life, and also I would have to travel to L.A. to go. I would much rather travel back in time to the boarding house inhabited by the Victory Munitions women. Someone was always sneaking in some hooch and playing on the piano, and in the absence of men, it was like 24/7 pajama dance party. Plus, if i got bored of the festivities, I could sneak down to the basement and have a long chat with Betty about Feelings.
Nicole Schultz: I would say that my dream party harkens back to my baby lesbian days when I entered an obsessive relationship with Xena: Warrior Princess. My fav episodes focused on the Amazon Tribe, mostly because it started the evolution Gabrielle’s character. And by evolution, I mean getting a pixie haircut and donning a leather bikini top. I would definitely want to be invited to an Amazonian bash. Fire, dancing and semi-nudity is a prerequisite. Those ladies know how to have a good time. At the end of the evening, if things get too overwhelming, I could always kick it with Gabrielle in a ceremonial yurt.
Dara Nai: I can’t think of any film or TV show party scenes that are as good as the IRL ones I’ve been to. Are there any where someone’s hair catches fire, but she keeps trying to pick up a girl anyway? Or the cops show up and people are jumping out of windows and then someone steals the cop car? Or a girl faints because she thinks she’s about to get her ass kicked for sleeping with another girl’s girlfriend? No? Bummer. ‘Cuz I rate those actual parties 5 solo cups. God, I miss college.
Dara knows how to party
Kimberly Hoffman: Oh, my. Would I have! Of course, it feels most natural to say I would have died to be at a party from one of The L Word seasons, most notably the second episode of Season 1 when Jenny and Tim go to Bette and Tina’s and Jenny is introduced to Marina. I recall watching that particular episode at the time and feeling so fluttery and weak at the thought of just carousing through that house with Shane in one corner kissing Girl #338, Alice slyly unbuttoning her jacket to get cozy on the couch, and Dana attempting to look straight.
But I’m torn. If it weren’t that particular party, I would have truly died to be at that Valley house party in The Runaways or, if we may consider the rollerskating rink gig they play at a party. Kristen Stewart as Joan Jett? Say no more. While all the California kids were doing Quaaludes, I’d be the one swooning in the front by the mic stand.
Chloe: Parties are all about a.) host b.) location and c.) guest list. Also open bar. Open bar is mandatory. My ultimate dream host is also my soul mate, Blair Waldorf. As anyone who followed current events between 2007-1012 knows, every episode of Gossip Girl (all of which I have seen) featured an amazing event raging from like 13 debutante balls to polo matches to a Speakeasy. Blair Waldorf’s charming elitism and excruciating OCD made her the best and most imaginative hostess/dictator. Her best event was the sleepover in Season 1 because sleepovers are rad and Blair Waldorf’s sleepover involve gin, racks on racks of couture, and crime. All parties should be sleepovers because then everyone can get drunk and snuggle.
Trish Bendix: I’m still pissed I wasn’t invited to Tess’s Cowgirls and Indians birthday party on Lip Service. I could have been on the receiving end of Frankie’s lips when she tries to make Cat jealous. I could have been the one that got used!
Karman Kregloe: I would attend James Franco’s party in This is the End, but I’d leave before the apocalypse (and AFTER Danny McBride arrived).
Punky Starshine: I don’t know if you would consider it a “party,” but in the finale of Orphan Black, when Cosima, Alison, Sarah and Felix were all in the same beautiful loft apartment drinking wine, all I could think was “I WANT TO BE IN THAT ROOM!” Even though they were talking about conspiracy and attempted murder and spies and lying and all that fun stuff. Ain’t no party like a Clone Club party.
What? No one chose Whitney’s Real L Word creamed corn wrestling party? Maybe you will, readers!