I am yogurt, hear me roar

Here is the thing: I never realized that yogurt was so girlie. All this time I was just living my life, buying groceries, eating yogurt and never noticing that this was simply not something that men did. No, yogurt is strictly a woman thing – like an “I am woman, hear me roar” thing. At least, that’s what the yogurt companies keep telling me.

I like yogurt, in general. I mean I don’t eat it every day and I’m terrified by the yogurt that, in the immortal words of Tina Fey, “helps you poop.” But it took the perceptive eye of Current TV’s Sarah Haskins to open my eyes to the fact that yogurt really is all about the ladies.

First, that video is genius. Sarah is my newest funny lady crush. Raise your hand if you have a friend who belongs to the gray-hoodie, “I have a masters degree but then got married” club. Also, bonus points for the Leisha Hailey product placement. I don’t care if Leisha is selling me faux empowerment with fruit on the bottom, she’s still adorable in those spots. Though, really, who serves yogurt at a wedding?

Still, more importantly, when exactly did yogurt become “the official food of women”? I remember my dad used to eat yogurt. But now, as I look at the Yoplait in my fridge, I see that it has a little flower on its logo. So I guess I won’t see my anti-girlie man governator Arnold Schwarzenegger spoon down a cup anytime soon. Hillary Clinton, on the other hand, might want to consider launching her own brand, now that she has some time on her hands. Sigh.

Maybe I’m just overreacting, but the feminization or masculinization of food is just weird. A guy can eat some yogurt and not feel his manhood is being shamed. And, conversely, a woman doesn’t have to eat yogurt to be part of the sisterhood of traveling spoons. Food is food. Though, seriously, does anyone have a spoon? I’m hungry now.

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