Dear The Young and the Restless staff writers: what have you been doing to us? It’s been years since Mariah Copeland (Camryn Grimes), one half of lesbian super couple Teriah, caught the bridal bouquet at Lola and Kyle’s lavish wedding. With “Kola” now kaput, we had high hopes that Mariah and Tessa, the show’s most stable couple, would be the next to marry. But after that initial sign of hope from the lesbian Gods, your writers went rogue.
We watched in amazement as you dreamed up one ridiculous plot line after another. You toyed with our emotions, made us question our fan loyalty and dangled Mariah and Tessa over that scary dark pit known as TV lesbian couple obscurity. But you FINALLY got it right and came through with a wonderful surprise. On the January 20th show, Mariah and Tessa officially became engaged. And on the January 27th episode Mariah and Tessa became engaged..again! Yes, it was a duel engagement, a witty and warm gift from the writers who owed us fans a little breath of fresh air.
I really wanted to celebrate, but I couldn’t do it just yet, remembering all the hell you put us through to get to this point. So I’ve compiled a short list of what I’m calling Mariah and Tessa’s “Greatest” Hits, a look back at the rather colorful events that helped shape our beloved Mariah and Tessa:
The Tanner (What??) Saga.
In this plotline, we were aghast when you seriously attempted to un-gay Tessa with a rock star ex-husband named Tanner Watts. Tanner first texted Tessa on New Year’s Eve and then blatantly asked her to tour with him. Meanwhile, conveniently forgetful Tessa (Oh, Mariah, didn’t I tell you I was once MARRIED?) actually agreed to leave Mariah behind. Tessa made it clear to Tanner that this was all business, but the damage was done. Poor Mariah descended into a fit of jealousy, leading us to…
The Mariah And Lindsey-the-Hot-Bartender Fling Story
If the Tanner/Tessa non-affair wasn’t bizarre enough, Mariah went bonkers imagining all sorts of rocking and rolling between the ex-spouse singers. So she did a little acting out herself by sleeping with Lindsey, a sexy bartender who just wanted to help. Tessa angrily caught them, but still denied that it was big deal to be on tour with an ex-husband Mariah knew nothing about.
The Birthing Baby Bowie Drama
Sweet, giving Mariah volunteered to carry a child for troubled, sterile couple Chance and Abby. So how was she rewarded? By having Abby’s deranged ex abduct and hold Mariah hostage for weeks in an isolated hotel room. Not only did super hero earth mother Mariah bond with and protect that child (whom she dubbed Bowie), she also gave birth right there. Now THAT’S room service!
The Noah Newman is Back in Town Mess
This is a recent development in the complicated world of Mariah and Tessa. Noah, who is Mariah’s brother and Tessa’s ex-boyfriend, is back in Genoa City, quietly showing up everywhere and creepily gawking at Tessa while insisting he wants nothing but happiness for the women. Sure Noah, we believe THAT one…
But with all the drama behind them and the drama to come, the couple finally enjoyed a little happiness. In typically quirky Teriah fashion, their engagement scenes were at once sweepingly romantic and lovingly awkward. It began when Tessa (Cait Fairbanks) devilishly lured Mariah to a lunch at Society restaurant. When bewildered Mariah spotted the beautifully decorated table for two, she asked in her most charmingly naive Mariah way “are we celebrating something?”
Tessa smiled. That’s all she needed to drop down on one knee and open her heart to the love of her life: “we deserve every bit of happiness because we never gave up on love, ourselves, our dreams.” She recalled them as a “delicate, fragile thing” whose love grew stronger. It was a moving speech and perfectly delivered in glowing close-ups which magnified the obvious love and affection between the women. Tessa presented her ring to Mariah and formally asked for her hand in marriage. But before she accepted, Mariah wanted to tell her something. We held our breath for a moment (oh come on, Mariah, what now?) and let out a sigh of relief when she asked Tessa to stand because “we lift each other up.” She praised Tessa for her strength and, in a sly dig at Tessa’s unruly past, reminded her of all the “crazy, impossible insane things” that they overcame. Mariah tearfully said yes to “a lifetime of us” and sealed it with a passionate kiss. But there was more to come.
In a pleasantly shocking turn the following week, Mariah brought Tessa to a room where she had recreated their first date night. Among the twinkling lights, Tessa sighed “a movie under the stars!” Mariah spoke movingly about her feelings for another woman and essentially coming out. She held out a ring and also got down on one knee. Tessa happily giggled and immediately accepted…again.
If these two can finally find happiness as a married couple, I will gladly put Tanner What’s-His-Name, Lindsey the Hot Bartender, Birthing Baby Bowie and Noble Noah behind me. So far, the women have been talking nonstop about a spring wedding and their plans to adopt a child. It’s shaping up to be a happy ending, even as I dread Noah and another heterosexual ex story, threatening their bliss.
In the meantime, I’ll tune out Noah and his love sick death-staring and instead, focus on the gorgeous details from Mariah and Tessa’s dual proposals. I’ll think about the table decorated with the slightly tasteless purple tablecloth, the balloons strewn all over the floor and the intimate lighting from the flickering candles. I’ll remember Mariah’s widened eyes as she realized what Tessa was about to ask. Most of all, I will start counting down the days to one helluva landmark lesbian wedding.
