This is it, ladies who like ladies, this is it. This is the episode you’ve been waiting for. This is the episode you’ve been dreaming about. This is the episode that takes all those heretofore suppressed Bo and Lauren FEELINGS and explodes them all over the screen in a glorious display of Doccubus. This is the moment they kiss. This is the moment they more than kiss. This is the moment they connect. This is the moment they disconnect. Yes, ladies who love ladies, this is really it. This is also the episode that convinced me I should buy my very own set of luxurious red bed sheets so I could see them wrapped around a lovely lady for myself. But that’s another story for another time altogether. So are you ready? OK. Take a deep breath and let’s hold hands – things are about to get real.
OK, granted, before we can get to the good stuff we have to sit through a rather prolonged, not to mention rather aggressive, sexual healing session between Bo and Dyson first. But, don’t worry, this is the last time – she promises.
But then, oh then, things go from simmer to boil and boiling over pretty quickly. From the moment Lauren tells Bo that humans are “a little pedestrian now” to her flashes of jealously at learning about Bo’s relationship with the “well traveled” Dyson, we’ve already long since taken the bait hook, line and sinker. It’s those big, soft brown eyes. We’d do anything to get looked at by those eyes. Heck, she could put that stethoscope anywhere she wanted – so to speak.
FEELINGS, FEELINGS, FEELINGS!
I feel like we should add a fourth, all-caps FEELINGS because there were that many of them flying around this episode. It was like a Big Lesbian FEELINGS-polooza. The subtle rivalry between Dyson and Lauren comes to a passive-aggressive head with each scoffing at the other’s suitability as Bo’s partner. Dyson tells Bo she is just leading her on and will never love her. And then Dyson cements his bad dog status by offering to help Bo heal and saying, “You need more healing than Lauren’s little needles can give you.” Yep, he just dropped the old “my manly bits are more satisfying than her lady bits could ever be” chestnut. And this is when Dyson officially goes from just broody to totally douchey in my book.
And then there were all of our Doccubus FEELINGS, which quite frankly were all over the place as well. First, we rejoiced at their shy flirtation in Lauren’s office. Bo boldly grabbing Lauren’s necklace and saying she likes it (p.s. I’m totally stealing that move). Their quiet, hungry looks at each other. Bo saying she’d like to take things slowly, if everyone was OK with that. Then we worried as the Ash told Lauren to distract Bo from going after Dark Fae favorite Vex because it could potentially start a war. Then we really worried when we learned Lauren didn’t just work for the Ash, but as the pendant declared, she was owned by him. But then we melted when Lauren went to Bo’s house and grabbed her arm to stop her, pull her close.
Bo: What are you doing?
Lauren: I don’t know yet. Just let me.
Bo: I don’t want to hurt you.
Lauren: I trust you.
Me. In a puddle. On the floor. And don’t think I didn’t catch Lauren feverishly unbuttoning her own shirt there, because I totally did. Then, oh then, the puddle me started to boil with all the hot as Bo and Lauren consummated their attraction all over her big, sprawling bed. That moment when Bo rips off Lauren’s necklace? Well, don’t worry, I’ll get into that more in a second. Needless to say, yum times 1,000.
But then our little hearts break again as Bo realizes Lauren was sent by the Ash. Both their eyes brim with tears and you just want to hug Lauren and you just want to hug Bo and you wish they could both just be rolling around on those big red sheet together again.
But instead we are left with Lauren, wrapped in those sheets, as she pleads her case – albeit poorly. She – well her and the Ash – really had her best interests at heart.
Lauren: Goddamit Bo, I’m trying to protect you. I haven’t done anything wrong.
Bo: You are in my bed because he told you to be. Everything about that is wrong.
Finally to stomp on our already broken hearts, an angry Bo flings Lauren’s necklace back at her with an icy, “Don’t forget your dog collar.” No. I wanted the opposite of this.
SEXY SUCCUBUS SHENANIGANS
Sometimes, words just aren’t enough. In those instances I turn to the power of pictures. This, my friends, is Doccubus.
But more than being just hot – but, damn, is that hot – this moment packed in more emotion than any booty call she had with Dyson the entire season. In that singular moment when Bo again grabs Lauren’s necklace, this time to rip it off with a defiant, “Nobody owns you,” we knew we’d never stop loving these two together.
BADASS BO BADASSERY
The central theme of this episode was freedom. Bo’s freedom to stay unaligned. Lauren’s lack of freedom from the Ash. The death row inmates end of freedom for breaking Fae rules. Vex’s ability to take away people’s freedom of movement all together. All Bo wants to do is be able to live her own life and find someone to live it with her. But, Fae or human, life just can’t be simple. In an effort to get more information on her mother, Bo tracks down a lead from a pudgy vampire (vampire are apparently Fae – Buffy, take note), which leads her to a Fae women wrongly imprisoned on death row for killing her kids which ultimately leads her to Vex. Also, I can’t be the only one who secretly loves Vex, right?
Though I have to say, I like seeing extra badass Bo emerge when confronting Vex. I’ve always felt she lacked some edge, some oomph. But finally, thanks to Trick’s tricked out Fae Witchblade, take-no-prisoners Bo comes out to play. After she breaks Vex’s thrall and lets out a taunting, “Uh-oh, puppet cut her string?” That’s just a vintage Buffyism right there. It’s that kind of embracing of power and defying of expectations that makes a strong female heroine truly great. OK, looking kickass in leather doesn’t hurt either. But, you know, mostly the empowering stuff.
But while Bo is busy channeling her inner badass, her so-called friends are being less than forthright. First Dyson lies to her saying, “I wish I could tell you there was some grand conspiracy about your mother, but there isn’t…they didn’t know anything about your mother – nobody does.” And then Trick, well, we’re still not entirely sure what’s up with Trick. But the one thing we know is he knows more than nothing about Bo’s mother.
KENZISM OF THE WEEK
And this is how a nickname is born:
“Obviously you can’t have Dyson and chase after Dr. Hotpants anymore. Time to pick a team, dude.”
BOOBS O’CLOCK O’ THE WEEK
Well, I didn’t say they had to be Bo’s – just that Bo had to be involved.
So, was it good for you?