OK, so all through this next scene with Trick where the Una Mens question him and provide needed exposition about Fae history and why the ancient order came to be (short version: Blood King became corrupt, council was formed, but the king betrayed them and stole a magic seed), I kept wondering whether the Lauren scene was real. Did we all just have a mass hallucination? Is it an evil trick? Is it an illusion? Did I accidentally take acid and now I’m on the best trip ever? Also, how does this seemingly all-knowing council not know Trick is the Blood King? Oh stop asking questions and just enjoy the hot geeky doctor talk.
Kenzi and Tamsin, meanwhile, are certainly enjoying the sushi buffet. That is until Kenz picks up a spicy salmon roll only to find Bruce. Yes, friends, it’s a Brushi platter. I hope they gave whoever pitched that joke in the writer’s room the appropriate rim shot sound effects afterward. Puntastic, people.
Kenzi makes the big guy get up and tries to find him a shirt. But considering I’ve seen sequoia trunks smaller than his torso, she grabs a tablecloth instead. Underneath the table, however, are the not-so-dearly deceased bride and groom whose party the Morrigan has hijacked. The Dark don’t pay for their own parties, let alone Brushi buffets.
Back in Snog City, Bo and Lauren are still at it. They pause for the requisite catch up, but also because perhaps their lips are beginning to chap. Hey, it happens. It goes a little something like this.
Bo: Hi, I’m Dark.
Lauren: Hi, I’m working for The Morrigan.
Together: You’re WHAT?
[Resume making out anyway.]
The Morrigan walks in and voices our unspoken internal monologue. Enough with the processing, “Scissor already!” I’m going to get a tattoo that says “Scissor already!” I’ll give you three guesses where.
Evony tells Bo she’ll give her the means to catch Vex if she promises to bring him back to her. But, you see, there’s always a catch. And the catch in this case is a tragic Fae creature called The Scavenger. The tragic part is clearly that dress. I think this is where Pepto-Bismol goes to die.
When next we see our unlikely Evony’s Angels, Lauren is stepping out of a limo that says “Just Married” while Bo watches. OK, now I know the writers are just trolling us. Not to get all Jane Rizzoli on their asses, but really, really?
Scavenger Pietra ruins the moment, naturally. Poor dear has peed herself a little with excitement, quite literally. But she does manage to find some ceremonial knife that Vex needs to cut out the poison the Una Mens gave him. Also I think she murdered someone to get it, though if you pass out underneath piles of trash this sort of thing is bound to happen.