Instead the Morrigan tries to feed him a death fly canapé, but luckily Dyson’s engagement ring protects him. As far as assassination attempts go, that one was pretty lame. Step up your game or go home, honey.
Hale tells a worried Bo about his forbidding Lauren to leave and she’s actually relieved because a little act of rebellion seems a lot better than a big act of breaking up forever. But then Bo finds herself with more immediate ex problems when she discovers Dyson foaming at the mouth. Rabies strikes again. The bartender says he called the paramedics and they arrive suspiciously quickly. Bo recognizes their smell: Eau du Skunk Ape. She tests them to see if they’re Fae and realizes they’re humans and armed.
Just then Kenzi pops up trying to help, but Bo tackles her to the floor to protect her and the humans are gone. They flee with Dyson and we’re all like, you can have him. I mean, I like the guy, but I’d much rather he be on his own spinoff show where he plays a loner cop with a penchant for taking off his shirt. Think of the crossover appeal to the AfterElton crowd. Call it Lone Wolf and it’s a guaranteed hit.
Bo, Trick and Hale try to interrogate the traitorous barkeep. But he drinks the remaining vial and kills himself before he can spill the beans. He just says something about them having his wife. Bo snatches the tube and is appalled to see it says “Dr. Lauren Lewis” on the side, so she pockets it before anyone else finds out. Meanwhile of course the Morrigan has overheard news of the human attack and of course knows the vials are marked “Dr. Lauren Lewis” and of course she plans to use all this information to her own nefarious gains. Of course.
Kenzi wakes up on Trick’s couch. But instead of Trick or Bo or even Hale’s friendly face it’s the stranger danger Fae fellow who proves as persistent as he is creepy. Kenz knows this, but his sales pitch is so enticing. Could he really turn her into a Fae so she doesn’t have to be the helpless human in distress? Short answer: No. Long answer: Hell no.
Bo went to Lauren’s apartment for answers. But she finds Tamsin in Lauren’s bathrobe eating her cereal instead. Thing is, homegirl has been living in her truck. So why let a perfectly good apartment with hot and cold running showers go to waste, right? Bo doesn’t have time to be incensed by the invasion of personal space, instead she’s trying to figure out why her Lauren’s name is on the vial that poisoned Dyson. And why the human kidnappers were using the same Skunk Ape glands to cover their humanness that Lauren did when they were in the pokey. Tamsin’s too busy cracking up about the total lezzer drama of one of Bo’s exes taking out the other ex.
But then she steps on her own laugh by stumbling a little because all of her meals have been in liquid form lately. Bo does a one-armed intervention to get her to beat the bottle, which actually works. Also she breaks the bottle, so even raging alcoholics think twice about drinking glass-flavored whisky off the floor. But things look even worse for Lauren when Bo finds her Ash pendant in the desk drawer. Bo hides it quickly in her clutch along with the vial. It’s like the Chamber of Lauren Secrets in there.