“Lost Girl” Recap (3.10): This is how a heart breaks


Bo and Lauren are having a Skype date, sorta. Lauren is relaying information on the autopsy and Bo is talking about them getting away to someplace with sand. She suggests Egypt but Lauren has been there. Can we talk for a second about the vastly different webcam resolutions? Bo’s camera looks like she bought it at the Dollar Store along with the sushi.

But their resolution isn’t the only thing out of whack. Lauren says they’ve been so busy doing different stuff. But Bo insists her stuff is Lauren’s stuff and Lauren’s stuff is her stuff. But their relationship status isn’t the only scary monster lurking in the background. Because just then the woodland Grouch attacks Bo and Lauren can only watch.

She calls Dyson who rushes in, but the thing runs off. And then they all run off after it. I sure hope Bo popped her head in the webcam to show Lauren she’s OK. That’s just good Skype etiquette. Dyson crashes into Kenzi in the hall, and then they discover the monster’s latest victim, the girl whose boyfriend was snatched before. This is the worst camp ever, I bet they don’t even have s’mores ingredients stocked in the cafeteria.

Tamsin finds a cardboard box waiting on her desk. And then proceeds to reenact the “What’s in the box” scene of Seven. Fine, so it’s not Gwyneth Paltrow’s severed head, but it is Acacia’s very distinctively tattooed and ringed severed hand. Next to it is the Rune Glass. I’m not sure, this is kind of vague as far as threatening messages go.

Just kidding, it’s totally clear. Message received, no need to pull your own hair out about it – just other people’s. So Tamsin saunters into Lauren’s apartment. She does this with the greatest of ease because, once again, Lauren has left her front door wide open. What is the deal with her and doors? Lauren is musing about what Fae is causing all the deaths and Tamsin recognizes it as a tikbalang, a creature form Filipino folklore.

She then plucks an eyelash from Lauren’s face and, only slightly surreptitiously, places it in the bottle. Now that I’m almost certain was just one hair. So, for those keeping score at home: one hair, she loves Lauren and two hairs, she trusts Dyson.

But Lauren does not trust Tamsin. Maybe it’s the fact that she helped keep her lady out all day when she should have been smiling and clapping supportively at her big award dinner. Or maybe it’s just her Lesbian Spidey Sense tingling. Because then Tamsin gives her the real reason she should distrust her: The Kiss.

And now Tamsin begins to lay it on thick. It was only that once. It wasn’t that big a deal. And she didn’t even feed off of her. Ooooh, gurl. GURL. But wait, I need a point of order clarification: Doesn’t this count as a kiss, too? I know their first lip-touching exchange was so Bo could feed, but that technically is also a kiss, right? Anyway, sorry, I got caught up on counting again. Stop it, Hannah Horvath.

Regardless of the number of kisses, any kiss is too much for Lauren, who lays down The Slap Heard Around the World.

Tamsin looks up in a slow, steady glare that seems to relish the contact. Is this her way of punishing herself for what she is about to do? Or does she just have a little kink? No judgment, let your freak flag fly, honey. Lauren tells her to GTFO and Tamsin complies, leaving her perplexed and shaken and not in the mood to make anyone breakfast in bed anymore.

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