They pass through the threshold to the temple and wind up right back at the bar. Dyson immediately thinks they should have a cold one. Seriously, is there no Fae equivalent to the 12 Steps? But it’s not exactly the same bar because something is off. For one, Dion’s “The Wanderer” is playing super loud over the stereo. Oh, please, we all knew we hadn’t seen the last of that ominous tarot card. And the hot model/would-be snack keeps popping up in pictures everywhere, too.
Just then a janitor comes up and explains the rules. Find the key, get out of the temple, pass the Dawning. Easy peasy. Right, so did anyone expect this whole big Fae bat mitzvah hoo-ha to be a little more, I don’t know, grand? Like maybe with robes and incense and ritualistic flogging? Nope, just a guy in coveralls with a broom. Is this a sacred ritual or the opening to the Carol Burnett Show?
Back in the real Dal, Kenzi is still upset about the whole abandoned pet scenario. Trick reassures her that if Bo doesn’t make it, Dyson or Hale could always use a scullery maid. But then he concedes that he thinks of her as family, and would gladly claim her if the worst happens. She’ll always have a place in our world. This almost makes up for all of his Fae rules/Human drools talk from before. Almost.
Speaking of rules, isn’t one of the big ones to run away from the sound of growling? Instead, Dyson is lending a hand by quite literally dragging Bo directly toward the sound of danger. But then when it arrives – in the form of a squinty monster with the worst crows feet you’ve ever seen – he’s no use after one swipe of the beast’s claws. Some hero.
And while we’re grinding axes, what is this business about Bo needing a hero to save her in the first place? She doesn’t need a man or a wolf or anyone to save her. She has been saving herself her own way just fine all this time, thank you. Be your own hero.
Bo says as much, telling him to stop monster-blocking her with his “male-honor bullshit.” And then Dyson admits he doesn’t have solely chivalrous reasons for being there. He loves her, he’ll always love her. And if that wasn’t insufferable enough he declares, “I’m just a wolf, standing in front of a succubus, asking her…” This earns him a well-deserved punch in the chest because you, sir, are no Julia Roberts.
Bo asks what happens now and Dyson says nothing, but to ask again in 100 years. At this point, I had such high hopes for a neat and respectful end to the Bo-Dyson saga. Give them a moment, tie it up with a bow, set it on a shelf. And before it gets too bad, squinty eyes shows up as the face of fandom and breaks up the kissyface.
So remember that movie Mulholland Dr. where Naomi Watts fantasizes that she’s an aspiring actress who meets a sultry stranger and begins a steamy affair with her only to be sucked through a portal in a blue box to awaken and find she’s put a hit out on her girlfriend instead in a fit of jealous rage? Or, at least, I think that’s what happened. Well, it’s like that for Bo. She wrestles a key away from the demon and gets sucked into an alternate universe. In it she is a cop. Lauren is her police partner/ex-lover. Dyson is her doctor husband. Kenzi (sorry, MacKenzie) is her key informant. And Trick is her gruff chief. It’s pretty trippy, and that’s even before we realize Doccubus has now become Copubus. To quote Keanu Reeves in every movie ever, “Whoa.”