“Lost Girl” (4.3) recap: It was the best of lesbian times, it was the worst of lesbian times

 
 

On the road back from everlasting wander, Cleo tries to pull a fast one on Bo and Dyson. She holds Bo at knifepoint and says she won’t blow in her ear to heal her unless she comes with her. Oh, Cleo, her eyes – and ear – are higher. But Bo doesn’t need any of Cleo’s healing, sexual or otherwise. She already had an elemental inside of her (wait, wasn’t there ear blowing required to make this work, I’m confused but that’s fairly normal).

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So Bo just turns around and lays the smack-down on Cleo. Right hook. Elbow smash. Succu-suck. I’m not going to lie, I’ve been waiting all recap to say this. OH MY GOD, BO KILLED JENNY.

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At least I think she’s dead. Or at least knocked the hell out. Poor Mia, she seems forever destined to die at the hands of hot women.

Lauren is hitchhiking her way out of Dodge. A car rolls up and she runs over to find Crystal. Can this really be happening? Are these two going to Thelma & Louise it, but with more sex? The look on Lauren’s face is so hopeful, so happy. This is fantastic. This is incredible. This is too good to be true. Yep, it’s the latter. Crystal apologizes and a big hand reaches out and chloroforms Lauren from behind. Oh, Crystal, honey–you sold out the cutest, sexiest, funniest girl who just rocked the hell out of your world just for a sad little farmhouse in the country? This isn’t just a sin against lesbian fandom. This is a sin against lesbiankind. I hope Duke kicks you in the heart.

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Just so happens Bo and Dyson are driving down the exact same country road at that exact same moment. What, is the highway system that small in Canada? They pass Crystal’s car along the side of the road and see a blurry commotion inside. Bo sits up and wonders aloud if they should help. Dyson looks back and says no, “Whoever that is can fix their own flat tire.” In other words, good luck saving yourself, Lauren.

Wolf Boy, come on. Just when I was starting to like you again you go and do that and now the full wrath of lesbian rage shall come down upon your head. First you kiss Bo. Then you marry her. Then you refuse to help her (albeit ex) girlfriend. I need to rage drink a six-pack and eat an entire pizza. Who is with me?

 

KENZISM OF THE WEEK:

No Kenzi this week, so no Kenzism. But, Bo gave us a pretty good introduction of herself.

Bo: Hi, I’m Bo. The unaligned Succubus. How are you? Just a couple things about me. I like leather. Having a good time. And, in case you haven’t noticed, I always meddle in things that don’t concern me.

BOOBS O’CLOCK OF THE WEEK:

I mean, at this point it’s almost too easy.

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