“Lost Girl” (4.3) recap: It was the best of lesbian times, it was the worst of lesbian times


Bo is still dazed and confused, but her Spidey senses tell her to snoop around the house. What she finds are three fortified bunker rooms. If this were a bed-and-breakfast the TripAdvisor reviews would read “Quaint. Charming. Dungeony.” The family tells her they’re for their own safety because they’re being haunted by a ghost who comes for them on the same day every year. So they lock themselves away year-after-year to hide from it. Bo tells them “Dealing with weird shit is kind of what I do” and offers her help. She should put that on a business card. Megan Fox Lite is all, OMG, this is ridiculous, but I won’t pass up the opportunity to get locked into a cell with this one for the night. Knowwhatimean?


So speaking of uncomfortable arrangements, the Morrigan has set up shop in Lauren’s apartment. We know it’s Lauren’s apartment because of the naked lady art and leafy green doorway to another dimension. Mossimo the Druid arrives having been beckoned after five years of having not been beckoned by Evony. They share some catty repartee that ultimately boils down to you’d better grow back my damn eye, bitch. Also, Evony goo-ifies the nail girl because why not? Man, Lauren is never getting back her security deposit.


At Holiday Dungeon, Megan Fox Lite is bored out of her mind until Bo bursts in. She shows Bo a family scrapbook showcasing her relatives’ unfortunate habit of getting dead. We’re supposed to believe the dad is crazy and possibly homicidal, but mostly it’s all just an elaborate excuse to get Megan Fox Lite to hug Bo.


I really don’t know what to say about what happens next. It’s one part homage to foot fetish fans, two parts deeply weird and all parts totally funny. All I know is there’s something about Lazy John and monkeys and being buried alive. Long story short, Dyson gets his toes licked by a dude in the ground for information about where Bo went in the woods.


p.s. Sadly, those pink toes are Cleo’s, not Dyson’s.

So Bo springs Megan Fox Lite from her cell with the best of intentions. But then quickly realizes she’s made a terrible mistake because all of the precautions her dad took aren’t signs of a ghost but of a Fae body jumper, or jumbee. So, wouldn’t you know, Megan Fox Lite walks past the shoes and knots and promptly gets jumped into.

A lot of angry familiar drama starts to bubble up–I killed my whole family, blah blah, bah – but the long and short of it is now the body jumper is inside the house and everyone is in deep doo doo. As if on cue Megan Fox Lite goes all Jennifer’s Body – wait, I just got it, is this whole thing an homage to the movie–and floats up using her scariest demon voice talking about how everyone is going to die. Bo turns on the blue light special and tells everyone to run. Me, I go run for some popcorn because, honey child, this is gonna be good.

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