As many of us know firsthand, there are few things worse than having your heart broken. Breakups, for the most part, are ugly. Gay or straight, male, female or in between, getting dumped sucks, dumping someone sucks and, after days, months or years of companionship, being alone sucks, too (for awhile at least).
So imagine going through an ugly breakup with a girlfriend of nearly two years in public. With every teardrop, emotionally charged rant and overly-dramatic comment being photographed, published and subsequently ridiculed. It’s been a rough week for Lindsay Lohan.
While we generally leave the Lohan/Samantha Ronson beat to the celebrity blogs and tabloids, the demise of their relationship has certainly been noteworthy, if not for the sake of storytelling, but for some insight into how the world at large views lesbian breakups.
Salon writer Tracy Clark-Flory put it simply:
After all, popular culture tells us that straight girls get crazy during breakups and, so, two chicks calling it quits equals twice the crazy.
OK, so Lohan cried, accused Ronson of cheating via Twitter, allegedly made a scene at Sam’s hotel and “chugged vodka” — isn’t that what happens after a breakup? If the media followed around every heartbroken man or woman a day or two after a bad breakup, I’m sure this would all be par for the course: So why is it that the women always get the bad wrap?
“You’ve likely gathered from the recent reports of rabid catfights, changed locks and restraining orders: Somewhere in the world, a lesbian couple has just broken up,” Clark-Flory writes.
Of course, the restraining order rumors were completely untrue, according to Ronson. But you know you have heard it before: “Oh man, I cant imagine dating another woman, there would be sooo much drama,” your straight female coworker says. Even your lesbian friends embrace the term “lesbian drama” with a laugh. But are lesbian breakups really more dramatic?
“I’m just really hurt!” Lohan told US Weekly says, adding that she feels “so alone” without Ronson. Off the charts “crazy” breakup reaction? Not so much.
If anything, the Lohan/Ronson split has allowed everyone to perpetuate their jaded views on lesbian women and relationships easily: Page Six called Lohan the “saddest girl in the world” and one of their often wrong “sources” accused Sam of using the actress to book more DJ gigs. The poor, helpless straight girl, “tricked” into dating a mean dyke who was using her.
As everyone does after a bad breakup, Lohan will hurt for a while and get over it, unfortunately for her, the mainstream media is waiting for her to jump off a cliff. Perhaps some women are more openly emotional after breakups, so are many men. A public, celesbian breakup is just like any other breakup: But the untrue rumors, backstabbing and s–t talking is all public knowledge.
If a prominent couple of gay men split would the suicide-watch brigade be called upon?
Do you believe that lesbian breakups are more dramatic?