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Why We Love Aries (Plus Your Weekly Lesbian Horoscopes)

Horoscopes for March 20th – March 27th, 2018 Happy Birthday, Aries! Does anything scare you? Seriously! Your fiery passion makes you extremely head-strong. This makes you a great leader because you are not easily bullied into submission. No matter how many people try to drive you out of a group or industry because of your strong opinions, you stand your ground and speak your mind. This has earned you many haters and many quiet admirers. Your following loves you because you are the voice they are afraid to have when they need it the most. Keep it up, Aries. As much as you piss people off with your unfiltered, impulsive, remarks, the world needs people who are willing to ignore the haters for a greater cause. Although you’re the spawn of Satan is some people’s eyes, you’re a hero in the eyes of those who need you. Aries You May Recognize

Your fate is written in the stars. A lot of astrology readings are painfully ambiguous and could apply to anyone. We’ve decided not to sugar-coat what the stars are trying to communicate to you this week. Scroll down to find your super straight-forward personal horoscope and come back every week for your forecast!

Getty Star-Sign Real Talk: Brutally Honest Lesbian Horoscopes If you have a fragile ego (ahem, Leos…) then you’re going to have to put your Sensitive Sally in check. This isn’t your local Sunday newspaper’s horoscope section. AfterEllen is about to get REAL with you right now. If you think you can handle it, scroll down and find out what that stars are actually saying to you this week. Aries

Who are these people?! You keep getting invited to parties from randoms you don’t remember meeting. As much as you want to stay home and cuddle while binge-watching reruns of Orange is the New Black, there is someone you are meant to meet at one of these gatherings. Dust off your fancy Converses and iron your tight fitted blazer. If anyone knows that life is short, it’s you, Aries. Don’t fuck this up.

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Taurus

You’re expecting guests soon and are flustered with how you will complete your work in time to cater to their visit. Time management is your best friend right now, Taurus. It’s time to take a chill pill before you start losing sleep. You’ll want to be refreshed before they arrive. There’s nothing like a rude host. Don’t be that person.

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Gemini

Wow! You’re truly being a jerk this week, Gemini. According to those who miss you, that is. You need your personal space right now and although you may be misunderstood, it’s important that you take all of the time you need to play video games or organize your bow tie collection. Your energy reserves are low and refueling them before returning to your social life will give you the spark you need to ensure your friends and family that you mean well so they shouldn’t take it so personally.

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Cancer

Hitting the refresh button in your online bank account repeatedly isn’t going to increase the number you see listed as your balance. You’re broke, Cancer. It happens. You’ve been getting a little generous with your expenses. It’s okay. Decrease your strip club and fast food visits and things will work out in the end. You’re on the cusp of not being homeless, so take this opportunity to stay there before things get too out of hand.

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Leo

A blast from the past is about to storm through your life, Leo! Take a deep breath and just enjoy the ride. No need to stir drama or bring up old dirt. Just stay positive and cordial. Focus on how to create new happy memories as you don’t have time to spend on meaningless banter. Reminisce on the good times and fun moments.

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Virgo

Hey, Gumby! You are stretched thin trying to build karma points. Stop letting your false guilt get the best of you. You only have so many resources, so choose wisely before you diminish into nothingness. It’s okay to feel bad for the mistakes you have made in life, buy there comes a point in time when you need to forgive yourself. What is done is done. If you’ve sincerely taken the steps to make amends with the universe it is time to move on and start over.

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Libra

Time to set your phone to “Do Not Disturb”. Quality time spent with someone close has been bombarded by texts, notifications, and distractions from social media. Trust me, they notice and they are getting annoyed! Best to turn off that ringer before it’s the only thing left in your life.

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Scorpio

Listening to those around you would truly improve your well-being, Scorpio. You’ve been struggling with feelings of low self-worth and it has deeply clouded your judgment. Although you’ve been acting out as a cry for help, bringing those around you down with you isn’t the answer. Misery may love company, but you’ve gone too far this time. It would benefit you to stop lying to yourself because you’re the only one you’re fooling.

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Sagittarius

Going somewhere, Sagittarius? Looks like you’ve been planning a trip and you’re super stoked about it! Woo hoo! Take this time to explore and adventure where the wind takes you. There is a lot to be discovered both externally and internally. This is the time to do it!

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Capricorn

Whew! Get out the robe, Judge Judy! You have a point-of-view you are deeply trying to convince someone of this week. Hate to burst your bubble, but they aren’t ready for it. Let them sleep on the information you have already given them and be more gently about your future expressions on this topic. They might come around in due time but lay off the persistence in the meantime.

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Aquarius

Gluttony is your theme this week. You’ve been overindulging your heart out. You only live once, right Aquarius? That’s how you see it, anyway. Take some time to recover and gather yourself. It’s okay to have some fun, but keep in mind that you still have some dreams and goals to check off so should consider not shortening the one life you do have while it is still here.

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Pisces

You’ve fucked up, Pisces, and the consequences are coming your way. We don’t need to even say it — you know what you did. Karma is a bitch and it’s coming for you. Time to start building up those points because what you have done is nearly unforgivable. Focus on the fact that no action goes without a response and accept your punishment gracefully. This will make it easier. The good news is that all things come to past and time heals everything.

About The Author: Lily Khuu is a psychic lesbian witch who enjoys expressing her predictions through the art of GIF and meme. She is also the executive producer and founder of the feminist group Matriarchy where she channels her activism by creating liberating female-focused gatherings. As an entertainment reporter for AfterEllen she gives the lesbian community a voice through public media. When she isn’t stuffing a microphone in someone’s beautiful face, she’s spinning under the pseudonym DJ Matriarchy. You can find her on Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter.

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