Raise your hand if you wouldn’t mind Mariana showing up at your door offering to protect you from the evils of the world. Okay, now, keep your hand raised, and use it to slap some sense into Gaby. She’s all, “You can’t stay here. How will I explain that to my father?” Mariana tells her that she’ll think of something, but that she can’t leave Gaby alone and not know if she’s safe.
Gaby pretty much swoons and melts into a puddle. And the two of them brainstorm some excuses as to why Gaby should have a friend over. Apparently, having a friend over automatically makes you a raving lesbian. Quick, someone send out that memo!
Gaby’s father is under the belief that Mariana is a marine biologist so he sets out to ask her all sorts of scientific questions during dinner. Mariana goes on to b.s. her way through the answers while Gaby nods her head and smiles no matter what nonsensical thing Mariana thinks up to say. Thankfully, Gaby’s father doesn’t suspect anything since he knows about as much as Mariana does about the human genome. And so dinner ends well enough.
Meanwhile, Armando, calls the Aparicio home to blabber more nonsense about Julia. At the end of the conversation, Rafaela tells Mercedes that Julia has it rough because no matter what they may think about Armando, he really loves Julia. Like really really.
Which basically means: We are never getting rid of Armando. Ever. Ever. He is going to appear naked in our dreams every night, going, “Let’s get it on.” For all eternity.
But anyway, Julia and Alma are getting ready for Operation: Catch A Homophobe. During dinner they decided that something has to be done about Rodo his Band of Merry Men. Since these guys know they’re being watched they’ll likely not try anything obvious while the police are on their tail. But Julia and Alma plan to go out in full lesbian regalia and draw out these nefarious beings. You see, while the homophobes might be able to control their evil tendencies around other, lesser gays, Alma’s and Julia’s combined Powers of Sapphistication should be enough to lure them out of hiding.
But first, Julia whines some more about the fact that she can’t decide between Armando and Mariana and tells Alma about her dream, which leads them to a conversation about how monogamy is lame and people should be more open-minded about love and relationships because Julia wants it all and she can’t have it all and that sucks, dammit
And then they run off to catch themselves some baddies.
To finish off the ensemble, Julia throws on some Glasses of Undeniable Gayness, because otherwise she might’ve not been believable as a lesbian. And then the two of them parade down the street trying to pass themselves off as a lesbian couple.