Interview with Sarah Rhoades from Top Model

 
 
Sarah and Kim on an episode of America's Next Top Model

AE: So, with this guy—you said you weren’t dating him at the time. Are you with him now?
SR: No, no, I mean, we hadn’t been together for six or seven months when I talked to him, and we haven’t ever been together since.

AE: So how about your relationship with Kim—do you think that was portrayed accurately?
SR: Yes and no. I kind of feel like they made it look like I was a lot more involved versus Kim, but we really [were] on the same page more or less, because I knew she had a girlfriend and she knew that I was semi seeing somebody. I don’t know, it kind of seemed like they made me like come off as the foolish one, when really I wasn’t at all, and I’m not now. So I didn’t appreciate that, but yeah, whatever. (Laughs)

AE: Tell me what really happened.
SR: They showed what happened, but in interviews they cut off a lot of what I was saying to make me seem like the needy, feeble, straight 18-year-old girl, and Kim was like the all-wise lesbian, which really wasn’t the case. I mean, we were on the same terms. I thought we were on the same page, and she thought the same. So, it’s fine (laughs).

AE: I think that many viewers actually feel that she treated you unfairly, that she was being more of a player than a friend to you. How do you feel about that?
SR: That’s pretty much what I mean. In the end I know what happened, she knows what happened, and the way that they edited it does make me come off as a fool and her being all powerful, but I know how it was and so does she. And we’re fine now, we’re friends, it’s really quite fine. I’m not mad at her.

AE: So you’re still in touch with her?
SR: She’s still with her girlfriend and I’m with someone, so it’s fine.

AE: Are you in touch with any of the other girls on the show?
SR: Me and Kyle talk sometimes, me and Diane, and Coryn now and then, we talk.

AE: Did you tell you family about what was going to happen before it aired, or were you not allowed to talk about it until the airdate?
SR: We weren’t really allowed to talk about anything. I kind of hinted at it, so I think they were kind of sort of expecting it, a little bit, so they were okay.

AE: How have they reacted to it? Have they talked to you about it at all?
SR: No, it’s kind of one of those unspoken things no one talks about it. No one mentions it or says anything about it, so it’s kind of like it didn’t happen, here. I’m from Boonville, Missouri, and the Midwest is very very different from L.A. [It’s] not as accepting, we don’t really have that many lesbian people or gay people or whatever out here at all, and no one really wants to talk about it, so we don’t. We don’t even say the word “lesbian”! (Laughs) It’s really different here, so, no, I actually have never talked about it with my mom or dad or anybody.

AE: Wow. Do you think that they might want to talk about it? Do you want to talk about it?
SR: I would if they wanted to, but they don’t seem to even want to acknowledge it at all. I mean, I don’t consider myself bisexual or a lesbian, so I’m not even sure what I would say to them at this point about it at all, so I’m kind of glad they don’t want to talk about it, I guess (laughs).

AE: Do you think, though, even if you don’t identify as lesbian or bisexual, do you think you just might not be straight?
SR: I don’t know. I really don’t know what constitutes as being considered one or the other. I don’t know, you tell me! (laughs) Kim’s the only person I’ve ever had feelings for, I guess, in that sense.

AE: In your parting words on the show, you said that you learned a lot about yourself. Tell me about something that you learned that has nothing to do with Kim.
SR: I’m a lot more confident and I have [more] respect for myself versus from before. I always had a low self-esteem and I didn’t like myself at all, and I didn’t think I could do anything, you know? I hated myself at one point in my life and the show has really brought out my confidence. I can honestly say that I like who I am today, and I have never been able to say that before, so I’m really thankful for the show in that way.

AE: That’s wonderful. What was your most unexpected experience on the show?
SR: Kim, for sure. That would definitely be it.

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