Ilene talks Times – are we ready to listen?

Would you pay $30 to hear Ilene Chaiken talk? No? How about if I told you she was bringing Jennifer Beals along with her? Still no? Wow, tough crowd. What if I told you there’d be ice cream? Fine, so there won’t be ice cream but I had to offer something.

The L Word creator, executive producer, killer-offer-of-characters-beloved-and-otherwise will take part in The New York Times discussion series Times Talk on April 20 in New York City. Oh, and Jennifer Beals will be there, too. Yes, that’s how it is billed in the Times Talk calendar, well, minus the killer-offer stuff.

And, once again, that billing is a microcosm of what was wrong with The L Word. It was always Mama Chaiken’s puppet show. Everyone else were just her marionettes, and no matter how well they performed the strings always showed.

The talk will be moderated by Times reporter Kim Severson, a food writer for the paper. OK, I don’t remember any particularly memorable recipes in The L Word, but I guess they were always eating or drinking something at The Planet.

Actually, the talk, titled “Life After ‘The L Word’,” will discuss how the show “broke new ground for those involved in the show as well as for the lesbian community, its impact on television, media, current events and pop culture — and what’s coming next for them all.”

Well, if by “broke new ground” they actually mean “made me scream at my television,” then the topic sounds about right.

Though the whole thing has me a little concerned. The description calls the who killed Jenny fiasco an “intriguing ‘whodunit’ plot twist.” Well, if by “intriguing” they actually mean “incomprehensible” and by “plot twist” they actually mean “unsuccessful attempt to ensure the creation of a ludicrous prison-themed spin-off,” then that sounds about right.

So, got your ticket yet?

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