Hollywood to Lesbians: “We’re Just Not That Into You”


And to be honest, the fact that these onscreen relationships have failed in small or spectacular ways isn’t even the most galling part.

No, the most vexing part is that we’ve disappeared off the screen entirely. Look, we don’t need a happy ending as long as we still get to be part of the fairy tale.

Bianca and Reese (Eden Riegel and Tamara Braun) on All My Children

Tonight, television will give us one more shot at the storybook as Grey’s Anatomy dips its toes into lesbian waters again, with the burgeoning attraction between Callie and new pediatric surgeon Arizona Robbins (Jessica Capshaw). SPOILER ALERT! But you need only tune into the last five minutes of the show if you want to catch the entire scene in question.

The interaction between the two women, while brief, is played well. So let’s commence nicknaming now.

I vote for Calzona, because the possibility that this relationship ends up being stuffed with cheese is very, very real.

Callie and Arizona (Sara Ramirez and Jessica Capshaw) on Grey’s Anatomy

But having been burned once already this year with the demise of Callica, the real question is whether it’s worth seeing how Grey’s will kick us in the gut handle another female same-sex relationship.

What’s that saying, again? Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me. Yeah, we’ll see.

Erica and Callie (Ramirez and Brooke Smith) on Grey’s Anatomy

So, looking over the television landscape and how our lives have been unceremoniously dumped in the refuge heap this year, it has become abundantly clear that when it comes to long-term representations of our relationships, Hollywood is just not that into us.

And you know what, Hollywood? We’re just not that into you either. Like, at all.

Like, stop calling, don’t bother sending flowers and banish the thought of hooking up with us again when May sweeps rolls along. Your sweet nothings mean nothing to us anymore. We respect ourselves too much to let you keep doing this.

This relationship is over.

And, guess what? It’s not me, it’s totally you.

For more on this topic,
read The Disappearing Lesbian on Primetime Broadcast TV

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