Owen, Callie and April are working on a young man who, trying to be like Jackass’s Johnny Knoxville, built a human slingshot and accidentally shot himself into a concrete wall. Come on, who hasn’t done that?
While the doctors work on their patient, his buddy outside the exam room is videotaping the entire thing so they can post it on YouTube. Excuse me, Mr. Video Man. You’ll need all of the doctors to sign an appearance release form and the Chief to sign a location release form allowing you to shoot in the hospital, and I have a feeling none of that is going to happen.
Lexie finds Thatcher and lectures him about not telling her he was coming to the hospital. Thatcher fears his body is rejecting his new liver. As Lexie is about to draw Thatcher’s blood, a young blonde, Dani, bounces in and kisses Thatcher on the lips. (I just threw up a little bit in my mouth.) Lexie is thrown by this because the young tattooed blonde is Lexie’s age. Bailey comes in to break up the tension, but as soon as Dani describes some past pain Thatcher experienced during their lovemaking (I hate that term) Lexie high tails it out of there.
Mark has requested that Avery be on his service for the day. Mark tells Avery to “sparkle” and use his God-given looks to help sell the plastic surgery department. Mark says it helps to be attractive when your job is making others more attractive. That makes sense. Who wants to go to a hairdresser that has bad hair?
Callie is working with April, who is driving her crazy. (Join the club!) Callie tells April that she needs to speak differently since her voice is so annoying. April responds, “Like with an accent?”
Callie shoos April away and tells her to bring her a coffee and muffin from the cafeteria. (I should be careful when I type the word “cafeteria” because Teddy might be reading this, and then she’ll be hunting for men and throwing herself on the cafeteria salad bar again.) Callie has second thoughts and nixes her coffee order since her coffee consumption was voted down earlier by Arizona and Mark.
Alex walks by one of the rooms and sees Dr. Hottie, Teddy, Arizona and Cristina speaking to his pregnant patient and her husband. Alex sneaks in the room and overhears them telling the soon-to-be parents that they should have a C-section today because they have a heart donor for their baby. The parents are hesitant and Alex pipes up and says that they need to decide immediately or else the organ will go to another patient. (Alex needs to back up! Where is security when you need them?)
Arizona tells the couple to think it over and asks all the doctors to file out of their room, then Arizona tells Alex he’s off the case. Dr. Hottie looks pleased with herself and takes her top off. Wait, that didn’t happen, but this episode is dragging so my mind started to wander.
Mark bribes Avery with the chance to perform rhinoplasty if he checks in on Lexie for him and finds out what she’s doing and how she’s feeling. Mark should just check Lexie’s Facebook status for that info.
Arizona walks into the break room and catches Callie pouring herself a cup of coffee.
Callie says that the studies she’s read state that caffeine isn’t bad for
pregnant humans. Arizona reminds Callie that they took a vote earlier
in the morning and the majority voted against caffeine. Arizona shames
her into not drinking the coffee and Callie exits without her coffee in
Lexie finds Meredith and tells her that their father is dating a 20-year old tattooed bimbo. (Who hasn’t dated one of those?) Meredith does’t care, but Cristina insists they go see him and watch him get it on with his young lover. As Lexie and Meredith watch their father get his freak on, he starts screaming out in pain (and not in a good way.) Lexie and Meredith race in to help and his “lady friend” wont get out of the way. Lexie screams at Dani to get back.
After everything has settled, Thatcher is doing much better and Bailey reports that his liver is fine. Lexie yells at Dani and calls her Thatcher’s mid-life crisis. As a mid-life crisis wife myself, I find that offensive!