Then this happened. Oh no. God, no. Not Cristina. I need her for my fantasy Joy Luck Club.
Gary asks for help finding the Chief. She may be preoccupied with her Owen drama, but Cristina isn’t too busy to help a visitor. She gives Gary detailed directions to Derek’s office. Gary steps off the elevator, turns to Yang, and says, "Have a nice day," in that quiet monotone that serial killers are so fond of. Phew. And yikes.
Derek’s on the phone, getting nowhere with some never-seen, soon-to-be-fired Head of Security. Mr. 911 doesn’t have a clue about procedure. Good thing Derek finds the answer in his Chief Handbook. The hospital is going into lock-down.
The lock-down conveniently traps Callie on Arizona’s floor, Teddy, Owen and Avery in the same OR, and Bailey and Charles with Mrs. Poop Bag. Meredith and Cristina are left joined at the hip, but what else is new there?
In pediatrics, Arizona attempts lock-down small talk with Callie, who’s doing a great job of ignoring her.
Arizona: I really thought that was a joke.
Callie: [under her breath] Sick joke.
Arizona: What? You can’t be stuck on the same floor with me? That’s a hardship?
Callie: Uh, yeah. Frankly, it is.
So much that elusive thing called the amicable lesbo break-up.
Cristina and Meredith aren’t taking the lock-down very seriously. Maybe it’s an ax murderer? Hee hee. Meredith thinks that would be fun. Yup, it’s all fun and games until someone loses an eye. Or, some brain matter.
Lexie and Mark are sniping at each other about Alex when Gary makes his presence known by shooting up the place. He nails a nurse in the neck and robotically goes up some stairs, as everyone hits the floor, screaming. Seriously. How hard is it to find the Chief’s office?
Mark grabs Lexie, covers her head with his million dollar hands, and makes a break for the elevators. This one’s taken.
Finally. Alex has lost almost all his blood. Mark wanted Alex out of the way, but not this far out of the way.
Also not a moment too soon? The cops. Tactical teams are doing whatever it is they do outside the hospital. From all the rifles pointed at the hospital entrance, it’s reassuring to know the decorative shrubbery is safe. Where are all the cell phone calls from people inside the building saying, "He went thata way"?