“Glee” Episode 313 Recap: Love Shack, Baby

Later, Sam comes up to Mercedes at her locker, and tries to give her a little statue of St. Valentine he’s crafted from a nativity scene figurine. Mercedes says she’d told Shane about Sam, but that she’s not going to date Sam. She’s too ashamed of herself for cheating on Shane, making her the only person in the history of Glee to show remorse for infidelity.

She pretty much crushes Sam, though, and this leads into a stunning rendition of “I Will Always Love You,” the song made famous by Whitney Houston, and filmed and recorded for this episode long before the singer’s death earlier in the week. Which made it all the more powerful.

In flashbacks behind the song we see Shane crying as Mercedes talks to him, and in present time we see Sam doing the same as Mercedes sings in the choir room. For a brief moment he’s alone in an auditorium watching her on the stage, in a red satin gown, illuminated by spotlights, and then we’re back in the choir room. Both Mercedes and Sam are crying, and when she finishes singing, he leaves the room.

I once could take Samcedes or leave them, but oh, that hurt my heart. As much as I respect Mercedes for wanting time to know her own mind, and for regretting deceiving Shane, I’m starting to think those two are meant to be together.

On Valentine’s night, Clan Hudson-Hummel is at the Berry house for dinner, and Rachel joins her dads in a performance of “You’re The Top,” which under the circumstances struck me as wildly inappropriate. Then they had a lovely duck dinner (no idea what vegan Rachel ate) followed by teenage lovemaking.

Yes, the full extent of the plot against Rachel and Finn’s wedding plans now becomes clear as all four parents practically push the happy couple into Rachel’s bedroom. Where they get into a big fight because Finn needs to take a dump and Rachel feels that’s something he should do at his own house. (I am not making this up. That’s what happened.)

They kiss, make up, get into bed, realize it’s only 7:15, and head out to join their friends at Breadstix, but not before ruining any hope on the part of Hiram and LeRoy that their reverse psychological ploy worked. Seems the Finchel wedding is now moved up to May, right after Nationals.

Kurt arrives a little early at the Sugar Shack, obviously expecting to be “surprised” by Blaine. But it turns out to be someone else entirely who is his secret admirer.

“Karofsky,” Kurt says, stunned, as Dave pulls his gorilla head off.

They sit down. It seems that ever since running into Kurt at Scandals (you know, when he told him to keep an eye on his boyfriend?) he’s been carrying a torch for Mr. Hummel.

Kurt is kind but definitely not on board. “So, you tormented me, shoved me into lockers, called me horrible names and hate-kissed me. Now, after one conversation in a bar, you want us to be together?”

That about sums it up.

“When I was at McKinley, I hated who I was,” Dave says. “I took that out on you because there you were, so proud. I’ve wanted to call you since that night at Scandals, and, look, it’s taken me a while, but for the first time in my life, I’m tying to be honest about what I feel.”

“And I’m flattered, I-I-I really am, but Dave, you just think that you love me. You don’t really love me.” Dave, sweetie, that was a gentle let-down. Take it.

But Karofsky still has stars in his eyes. “Oh, you’ve helped me so much, Kurt, you don’t know. I haven’t come out at school yet, but maybe I will next year.”

Kurt says he’s proud of him for coming so far, and he wants him to be happy, but he’s with Blaine.

Dave didn’t, for some reason, see that coming, and rushes to leave despite Kurt’s offer of friendship. Kurt follows him, and Dave turns and says, “I hope you like the candies. The butterscotch ones are my favorite.”

And then some guy who maybe we’re supposed to know but I don’t recognize says, “Mine, too. Hey, Karofsky.”

Dave says, “Nick.” He’s totally freaking out.

“You guys hanging out for Valentine’s Day?” Nick asks.

Dave denies it, and Kurt tries to help him cover. “No, no. We-we used to go to the same school. We just bumped into each other.”

“That’s exactly what it looked like,” Nick says, clearly not believing it. And poor Dave just tears out of there, and I’m filled with a terrible sense of doom. Would this show really go there? Either to having Karofsky get bashed, or having him do something terrible to himself? Or is he going to dive back deep in the closet and start bashing again himself? I mean, they can’t just leave it like this. Right?

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