Over at Fabrey’s House of Horny Insanity, Quinn tries to get Puck to put another baby inside of her, but he just cuddles her instead. And in Sylvester’s Office of Normal Insanity, Sue finds out she’s lost the election, but vows not to lose Cooter to Beiste. I guess they’re going to fight over him so more? Yaaaaay.
Kurt is wearing a wool poncho, I think. I don’t know. It’s incredible. He mans up — because that is his thing — and congratulates Brittany on her student council victory. Brittany says he’s still the most unicorn of them all, Sugar Motto does a unicorn impersonation, and Blaine reaches across to Kurt and tells him not to give up hope. Ever. They’ll figure something out. Those two, I swear.
Santana and Idina Menzel bring us home with “Constant Craving” and it’s one of the best closing montages we’ve had in a while. The Humell/Hudson clan celebrates Burt’s victory while Kurt forlornly contemplates his future as a fry cook, Beiste does some curls and contemplates her future as Mrs. Beiste-Sylvester, Sugar Sugars in the background, Kurt and Blaine send off his Nyada application, and Rachel slow-mos back down the hall with tear streaming down her face.
In the final scene, Brittany and Santana kiss right on the lips. JUST KIDDING. Rachel confesses that she rigged the election and has been banned from Sectionals.
Don’t worry, you guys: You’ve still got Sugar Motto!