“Glee” Episode 305 Recap: “Make of Our Hearts, One Heart”

Kurt and Blaine are getting out of car in the Scandals lot
with their fake IDs. Kurt is from Hawaii, Blaine is 38, but they get
in. “Aloha.”

It’s Drag Queen Wednesday. It’s also apparently 80s night. And
Sebastian is there.

“I really don’t like that guy,” says Kurt as they
walk over to him.

is dismissive. “He’s harmless.” Poor Sebastian.

Sebastian has a beer for Blaine and a Shirley Temple “with
extra cherries” for Kurt, who is the dedicated driver. All the time.

Blaine and Seb are dancing to ABC’s “Poison
Arrow,” when who do you suppose sits down next to Kurt? If you use not the
Interwebz, you will be shocked to discover it’s Dave Karofsky.

“Better keep an eye on your boyfriend,” Dave

Kurt turns around, and recovers fast and well. “So,
how’s life at your new school?”

“Fine,” Dave says. “I just wanted a normal
senior year and to play football without my teammates hearing rumors about

“Just to let you know, I would never have told anyone.
That’s not who I am.” It is, sadly, who Santana is, of course, so perhaps
Dave was wise to transfer.

Kurt looks at Blaine and Sebastian dancing before saying
anything else. “So, you come here all the time?”

Dave nods. “People like me here. I feel accepted.”
He smiles. “I’m what they call a bear cub.”

“Because you look like Yogi?”

“Because I’m burly or something.” His face
changes. “What, is this the part where you judge me?”

“No. As long as you’re not beating people up, I’m all
for being whoever you have to be at your own speed.”

And then he looks at Blaine and Sebastian again.

Dave says, “I’m just trying to get through high school.
Here’s to baby steps.” They toast. And then Kurt jumps up, shimmies out
onto the dance floor, puts himself right in between Sebastian and Blaine, and the two boys
dance to Thelma Houston‘s
“Don’t Leave Me This Way,” which was covered in the 80s by either the
Communards or Bronski Beat, but either way, by Jimmy Somerville.

Later, Kurt is helping a very drunk Blaine – who claims to
have had just one beer – to the car.

“This is the best night of my life,” Blaine enthuses. “I
wanna live here. I just wanna live here and make art and just help people…”

Kurt is tolerant of his drunkenness, and tries to help him
into the back of the car. “Less likely to throw up that way,” he
says. Although he’s wrong.

has other ideas, and pulls Kurt down on top of him. And then everything

Kurt tells him no, first somewhat laughingly, but then
seriously. But there’s a little bit of a struggle, and finally Blaine says, “Let’s just do it. I want

“Stop it,” Kurt says.

“I know you wanted to do it in a field of lilacs with
Sting playing in the background,” Blaine
says, “but who cares about that? It’s all about us, right?”

Kurt is furious. “Right. It’s about us. Which is why I
don’t want to do it on a night you spent half of dancing with another guy. And
that you’re not sober enough to remember the next day.”

bewildered, asks, “Why are you yelling at me?”

Kurt blazes back, “Because I’ve never felt less like
being intimate with someone, and either you can’t tell or you don’t care.”

Kurt. Rules. That is all.

ends up walking home, and Kurt does not go after him.

Did I mention that Kurt rules? How about that Chris Colfer is going to win an Emmy
for this?

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