“Glee” Episode 215 Recap: “Everybody’s Got a Random!”

 
 

Anyway, Artie’s sitting in the choir room when Will walks
in, announcing that Regionals is in one week, and it’s time to get deep into
their set list. This is so Glee
they don’t even have their set list settled yet, and the competition is in a
week? Sigh. No wonder Vocal Adrenaline kicked their butts.

Will stops talking when he sees Artie’s face, then asks him
what’s wrong.

“My life is over,” Artie says. “How am I supposed
to support a baby?” (I’d say the time to ask that question was before your
little swimmers got loose, dude, but whatever.)

Artie turns to Brittany
and asks, accusingly, “How could you not tell me about this?” Which
reminds me of how he reacted after the first time they had sex, as if it was
all her fault and her doing, and he hadn’t been eager and willing/hating on
Artie.

“I’m so sorry, Artie,” she said. “I didn’t
want to upset you. I thought I could surprise you when I dropped him off. I’m
sure it’s a boy.”

“Ummm,” says Puck,
“Babies don’t get dropped off.”

Will asks if she’s been to the doctor yet, and it turns out that Brittany saw a stork
building a nest on the roof of her family’s garage, and that’s the root of her
belief that she’s pregnant.

Er, wasn’t Brittany
there when Quinn had her baby last
season? Oh, wait, sorry; Glee and
continuity: One of these things is not like the other.

The reaction shots to Brittany’s
statement are just great, especially the patented Santana WTF expression, although
Sam‘s pretty funny, too, given that he’s not exactly the brightest bulb on the
string.

But the whole thing makes Will realize the New Directions
kids might be having sex, but they are woefully ignorant about it. He and Holly
chat about this while she teaches a jazzercise class he’s taking, a concept I
just can’t even begin to understand or accept, so I pretended it wasn’t
happening.

Holly says her theory of sexual education is like the
cookbook that recommends you hide vegetables in other food so children will eat
them without knowing it.

“I’m not following you,” Will says.

“It’s jazzercise, Will,” she replies. “It’s
not that hard.”

But Will meant the sex ed thing, so Holly offers to come
sing to the Glee Club about it, and slip in a little education about STDs.

“And speaking of STDs, how is your dating life?”
Smooth, Holly.

“Right now,” Will tells her, “I’m president
of the Celibacy Club.”

“Too bad,” she says. “That’s a waste of some
fine man-butt.”

The next time the Glee Club meets, Will writes the word
“sexy” on the board. “I sure hope that’s not a requirement for
Regionals,” Santana says, leaning on the piano. “Because with Berry in those tights,
we don’t stand a chance.”

Then Will gives an awkward and euphemistic and inept little
talk about sexual responsibility, which he stumbles and fumbles into an intro
for Holly.

“Sex,” she says. “It’s just like hugging,
only wetter.”

Then she starts grilling them on their sex ed knowledge.
“Finn, is it true you thought you got your girlfriend pregnant via hot
tub?”

“I’ve always been dubious,” he tells her.

“And Brittany,
you think storks bring babies?”

“I get my information from Woody Woodpecker
cartoons,” she says.

Holly says those days are gone, as she’s going to get them
up to speed on the birds and bees.

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