Kurt and Blaine adorably meet Rachel and Mercedes for coffee, and Kurt’s
appalled to find out what’s being going on at McKinley. “Why hasn’t Finn
told me anything about this?” Kurt says. “We live together. I mean, I
bring him warm milk every night just in the hopes we’ll have a little lady
“Warm milk? Really?” Blaine says, a very strange look on his face.
Kurt assures him that it’s delicious, but, ummm, Kurt,
sweetie? I don’t think that’s why Blaine
looked like that.
Rachel says that it’s Finn’s way to take on the burdens of
the group, and sighs that if the two of them were still together, she could
make him feel a lot better.
“Let it go, Rachel,” Kurt says. He should know.
listens to the football team woes, and points out that high school rules only
require the Titans to have four more players. And he promises that he and Kurt
will be there to cheer them on if they work it out.
Kurt agrees enthusiastically. “We love football. Well, Blaine loves football. I
love scarves.” Oh, Kurt. I love you.
So of course, the glee girls decide they’re going to join
the football team. Tina, Rachel and
Mercedes promise to avoid getting hurt by lying down, but Lauren (my new favorite character) sneers, “Not me. I’m gonna
bring the pain.” She reminds them she’s the state champion in Roman-Greco
wrestling, and has three offers from professional wrestling teams for after she
graduates. Go, Lauren!
In the next scene, Sue is pressuring Brittany to agree to let her shoot her out
of a cannon. “I don’t want to die,” Brittany says. Sue is unmoved, and convinces
her to sign the consent form by telling her the cannon’s two little baby
cannons will go hungry if she doesn’t agree.
reluctantly takes the consent form from Sue. “How many m’s in the letter
‘r’” she asks.
“Make an ‘X,’” Sue responds.
On the football field, Karofsky and his gang saunter up to
Finn. Finn tells Karofsky it’s not too late, but he refuses to play. Then the
guys catch sight of the glee girls suited up and coming onto the field.
“What are they doing?” asks Azimio in disbelief.
“What you don’t have the balls to do,” Finn
answers. And he goes to greet his new teammates, who are instructed to lie down
on the field to avoid getting hurt. I don’t think any of them has ever looked hotter. TINA!
The Titans are getting slammed in the first half, when one
of the opposing team knocks Finn down (I’m sure there’s some technical term for
what he did, but I have no idea what it is), and Tina suddenly jumps up, grabs
the ball, and runs. She’s tackled and for a minute it looks like she’s really
hurt – and we see Karofsky in the stands, looking stricken. Mike Chang runs over in best boyfriend
fashion, and it turns out she’s fine.
And Kurt is there, cheering them on, but I don’t see Blaine anywhere – I don’t
see Burt, either, just Finn’s mom. Weird.