Halfway through the song, Dr. Carl (John Stamos)
comes onstage. Dressed head-to-toe in leather. Somebody needs to tell him that
that bar he’s looking for is next to
the school, not inside of it. He accuses Mr.
Schue of trying to steal his woman.
Faced with confrontation, Will performs the amazing
evasive move of freezing time and retreating into a flashback. “How did it get
to this?” his voice-over muses. “How did a production of Rocky Horror turn into my horror?”
It all started,
we’re told, a week ago in the lunch room, where Will found Emma doing something shocking … eating
a sandwich with crusts still on.
When Will comments on this, she laughs it off, saying she
must have forgotten. You see, she and Carl had had such an amazing weekend,
having gone to see Rocky Horror.
Which means that she’s no longer a virgin, which you’d think would make Will
But Will finds this even more shocking than the crusts,
given the movie theater is such a germ-ridden dive. Emma responds that she was
having so much fun she didn’t even notice. In that respect, she’s doing much
better than me these days. I’ve stopped going to movies because, as everybody
knows, bedbugs love them. Having all my clothing and furniture infested by tiny,
insidious mites just for the sake of seeing The
Town? No thank you.
Anyway, Emma is now so taken with Rocky Horror that she and Dr. Carl plan to dress up for Halloween
as characters and go trick-or-treating. I don’t know what’s weirder about that
– that they’re adults who plan to go
trick-or-treating, or that he’s a dentist
who plans to go trick-or-treating. He clearly was one of those four out of five
dentists who went running around demanding his patients chew Trident.
Will thinks to himself that Emma is clearly getting
better, and it’s thanks to Dr. Carl’s influence. This means Dr. Carl is
“winning,” and he can’t have that. So he blurts out that it’s funny she loves Rocky Horror so much because he does
too! In fact, he’s going to have the glee club perform Rocky Horror for the school.
She points out that there’s some pretty risqué material
in it. But he pooh-poohs that by saying he’ll just make some edits.
This comment at least justifies some of the sanitization
evident in the pre-released song clips that had so many people so upset. And
it’s a legitimate issue – schools do wind up having to edit musicals all the
time. Why in my high school alone, when we did Naked Boys Singing, we had to do it fully clothed, so there you go.