“Glee” recap (5.14): The lost season 4 premiere

 
 

Sam is at home playing video games in the middle of the day for the 60th day in a row, so Blaine — who saved a bunny from traffic and helped a homeless man find a shelter and changed a tire for a taxi driver and tuned all the guitars at the music shop and gave directions to a group of tourists and taught a yoga class, all on the way home from walking Kurt to school — decides to have an intervention. They zoom off to Times Square to sing “Best Day of My Life” with a gaggle of street performers.

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Blaine twirls an extra who looks like she’s in literal shock. Like one minute you’re walking up 42nd St. bitching at your mom and dad about how it’s too damn cold to be outside and they just had to sit on the uncovered top deck of the tour bus, and the next thing you know, Darren Criss is whirling you around in Times Square and you’re peeing yourself. That’s what her face looks like. Like a Saturday morning cereal commercial.

In mime class at NYADA (“And now we will stop to pick a flower, and in front of your eyes, the flower dies”), Kurt spies Blaine, who has gotten permission from Carmen Tibideaux to take this upper classman symposium with Kurt. In fact, he is in six of Kurt’s classes. The mime prof. is like, “And now you’re trapped together in a glass box with the person standing next to you, and the air likes his lungs best and so you will be dead within seconds.” Kurt is not amused. He becomes even less amused when Blaine wont stop futzing around with the Soda Stream machine back at the loft while Artie tries to tell the story of getting mugged.

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Rachel orders hot water with lemon and Sam wants to talk about booking modeling jobs with his new haircut and Artie is so depressed about his laptop and Blaine is doing the soda bubbles and Kurt’s head is about to explode.

Kurt: Oh my god, you guys, just stop.
Rachel: My thing should take precedence right now; Mr. Schue told me I’m the most important person in the world!
Blaine: Wait, Mr. Schue told me I’m the most important person in the world.
Sam: Uhhh, no. That’s what he told me.
Artie: Excuse me, Mr. Schue said that to me.

Uh oh!

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Kurt goes to Elliott to talk things through because Elliott has been blessed with the gift of radiating sexual energy perspective. Kurt was already freaking out about losing his autonomy, but then Blaine brought home a couch full of bed bugs last night and Kurt thinks it’s an omen for their doomed relationship. Elliot smiles at him, says, “You don’t do anything in half-measures, do you?” Kurt doesn’t understand the question and he won’t respond to it. The answer, of course, is in his every outfit, but that’s really neither here nor there at the moment. Elliot says maybe instead of tanking things with the love of his life, he should maybe just talk it out with Blaine and set some boundaries. They sing “Rockstar.” They sound amazing. The land of TV needs so many more best friendships between gay men. These two are a balm.

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