Getting Hitched: Lesbian Weddings in Film and TV


Everyone’s touchingly
happy for the couple and glad to see bad girl Shane settling down, even if they’re
also a little bit surprised. "I want to believe, my friends," Alice says on her radio
show before the big day. "’Cause my friend Shane is getting married this
weekend, and I wanna believe for Shane, and I wanna believe for all the rest of
us who are flailing around in this abyss, trying to feel what we’re supposed to
feel in order to connect in meaningful ways."

Marriage is what connects
us and makes us better people, she says; why do the "defend-the-family
crusaders" work so hard to deny it to us? She continues:

Why can’t
they just wish us well? Hypocrites. Because we’re goin’ to Canada, people, whether you like it
or not, to take our best shot at this connection. And if we fail, it is not
because we are less wholesome than you are. Please. I mean, you guys have been
failing at this miserably since the beginning of recorded history. And if we
succeed, and our love connections actually flourish, and there’s a little less
loneliness in the world, then even I might start believing in miracles.

At first, it looks like
miracles will be happening. Carmen’s family shows up, thanks to Helena‘s largesse, and she
reconciles with her mother.

Shane’s friends throw her
a bachelor party, where Alice
thanks her for past acts of friendship, saying: "Shane, thank you, as a
friend, for saving me from going home with that girl that night. You know the
one I’m talking about. And, as a friend, taking her home yourself. Thank you."

After rappers God-des &
She show up, courtesy of Carmen, to rap a few pointers on a happy marriage, Shane
sneaks up to Carmen’s hotel room and drags her out into the hall for a
passionate make-out session.

We get miracle number two
when Shane’s father and his wife arrive unexpectedly to attend the wedding, and
yet another miracle when we see Carmen’s mother proudly walking her down the

Unfortunately, just before
the ceremony Shane sees her father with another woman, and whatever belief she
had in her ability to commit to Carmen dissolves.

"It’s just who I am,"
he tells her, and those are the exact words Shane sends, via Alice, to let Carmen know the wedding is off.
Carmen is left sobbing at the altar — literally.

The L Word was born into a post-Queer
as Folk
world, and its lesbians inhabit a different cultural space than the
earlier series. The show is both less politically correct and infinitely more
diverse, although the theme of the nature of family, and story lines involving
babies, get as much play as they did in Queer
as Folk

It’s also intriguing that
of all the couples in the show, it was one involving Shane who came closest to
making it to the altar. Melanie and Lindsay were already living together and
parents when we met them; Shane is a player, and certainly voted least likely
to tie the knot by everyone who knew her. Using a fairy-tale wedding as part of
a story of awakening and redemption — albeit with an unhappy ending — is a
lesbian television first, and only.

Same-Sex Weddings in the Movies

When it comes to the
movies, most of those that feature same-sex weddings never make it into
widespread distribution. Instead, we see lots and lots of heterosexual weddings
where LGBT characters are either essential in bringing the straight couple
together, or where the wedding reflects in some way on queer issues such as
marriage equality.

But there are a few
independent films that center around weddings between two women, the most
recent released just this year. It’s unfortunate that there aren’t more, but
consider this: It also means we don’t have our own I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry.


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