Styled Out: Giving off a gay impression

For some of you this may be hard to believe, but I swear to God there are moments in my life where I wished that there was something on me that just like, screamed “LESBIAN!” When I was a single living lady this desire was a bit more strong but being a lez who leans a bit more on the feminine side of things, I feel like I need a name tag or a badge or something sometimes to ward off unwanted male attention.

Whenever I feel like I need an extra amp or two of gay in my life, and I’m aiming to come off like the dyke that I am, I reach for the obvious — the “wife beater.” (Can we think of a new name for this wardrobe gem, BTW?)

A racer back style tank is great too, yes, but when you’re wearing that ribbed tank straight out of the package it’s like a direct Bat Signal. Double points if you happen to have a tattoo. Last week, some of you mentioned that a tattoo is a stand out way to convey lesbianism, but, again, please make an informed decision if you’re thinking about ink.

I feel like anytime a girl is wearing a tie in a serious manner (i.e. for a special dress up sort of occasion) it’s a straight up signal that she may not be walking on the straight side of the street. The most aesthetically “non-lesbian looking” girl could raise an eyebrow if she showed up at a wedding in a tux versus a dress.

I’ve mentioned them before but Banana Republic makes an illsuit. It’s not over the top expensive and they tailor it to fit. I happen to swoon for girls spiffing themselves up in a traditionally more masculine approach — button-ups are so hot.

Another queer quick-fix is the strategic use of rainbow gear. I know, I know it’s so trite and “baby dyke-ish” but man, if you throw on a rainbow belt with some longer cut offs, few boys will mess with you and the ladies will have a subtle message from the lesbian herself. Anything obviously or visibly rainbow-ish will do. I truly think that rainbow suspenders are good gear to have and jazz up a T-shirt and jeans any day. Steer clear of being too subtle however or everyone will just miss the point.

In the same vein, wearing an article of clothing with a known gay icon like Billie Jean King or Tegan and Sara should do the job of telling it like it is through images.

How do you tell the world you’re a homo?

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